FLAPPERS AND PHILOSOPHERS
BY F SCOTT FITZGERALD
To Zelda
1,The Offshore Pirate 2.The Ice
Palace 3.Head and Shoulders 4.The Cut-Glass Bowl 5.Bernice Bobs Her Hair 6.Benediction
7.Dalyrimple Goes Wrong 8.The
Four Fists
1.The Offshore Pirate
I
This unlikely story
begins on a sea that was a blue dream, as colorful as blue-silk stockings, and
beneath a sky as blue as the irises of children's eyes. From the western half
of the sky the sun was shying little golden disks at the sea—if you gazed intently
enough you could see them skip from wave tip to wave tip until they joined a
broad collar of golden coin that was collecting half a mile out and would
eventually be a dazzling sunset. About half-way between the Florida shore and
the golden collar a white steam-yacht, very young and graceful, was riding at
anchor and under a blue-and-white awning aft a yellow-haired girl reclined in a
wicker settee reading The Revolt of the Angels, by Anatole France.
She was about nineteen, slender and supple, with a spoiled
alluring mouth and quick gray eyes full of a radiant curiosity. Her feet,
stockingless, and adorned rather than clad in blue-satin slippers which swung
nonchalantly from her toes, were perched on the arm of a settee adjoining the
one she occupied. And as she read she intermittently regaled herself by a faint
application to her tongue of a half-lemon that she held in her hand. The other
half, sucked dry, lay on the deck at her feet and rocked very gently to and fro
at the almost imperceptible motion of the tide.
The second half-lemon was well-nigh pulpless and the golden collar
had grown astonishing in width, when suddenly the drowsy silence which
enveloped the yacht was broken by the sound of heavy footsteps and an elderly
man topped with orderly gray hair and clad in a white-flannel suit appeared at
the head of the companionway. There he paused for a moment until his eyes
became accustomed to the sun, and then seeing the girl under the awning he uttered
a long even grunt of disapproval.
If he had intended thereby to obtain a rise of any sort he was
doomed to disappointment. The girl calmly turned over two pages, turned back
one, raised the lemon mechanically to tasting distance, and then very faintly but
quite unmistakably yawned.
"Ardita!" said the gray-haired man sternly.
Ardita uttered a small sound indicating nothing.
"Ardita!" he repeated. "Ardita!"
Ardita raised the lemon languidly, allowing three words to slip
out before it reached her tongue.
"Oh, shut up."
"Ardita!"
"What?"
"Will you listen to me—or will I have to get a servant to
hold you while I talk to you?"
The lemon descended very slowly and scornfully.
"Put it in writing."
"Will you have the decency to close that abominable book and
discard that damn lemon for two minutes?"
"Oh, can't you lemme alone for a second?"
"Ardita, I have just received a telephone message from the
shore——"
"Telephone?" She showed for the first time a faint
interest.
"Yes, it was——"
"Do you mean to say," she interrupted wonderingly,
"'at they let you run a wire out here?"
"Yes, and just now——"
"Won't other boats bump into it?"
"No. It's run along the bottom. Five min——"
"Well, I'll be darned! Gosh! Science is golden or
something—isn't it?"
"Will you let me say what I started to?"
"Shoot!"
"Well it seems—well, I am up here—" He paused and
swallowed several times distractedly. "Oh, yes. Young woman, Colonel
Moreland has called up again to ask me to be sure to bring you in to dinner.
His son Toby has come all the way from New York to meet you and he's invited
several other young people. For the last time, will you——"
"No," said Ardita shortly, "I won't. I came along
on this darn cruise with the one idea of going to Palm Beach, and you knew it,
and I absolutely refuse to meet any darn old colonel or any darn young Toby or
any darn old young people or to set foot in any other darn old town in this
crazy state. So you either take me to Palm Beach or else shut up and go
away."
"Very well. This is the last straw. In your infatuation for
this man.—a man who is notorious for his excesses—a man your father would not
have allowed to so much as mention your name—you have rejected the demi-monde
rather than the circles in which you have presumably grown up. From now
on——"
"I know," interrupted Ardita ironically, "from now
on you go your way and I go mine. I've heard that story before. You know I'd
like nothing better."
"From now on," he announced grandiloquently, "you
are no niece of mine. I——"
"O-o-o-oh!" The cry was wrung from Ardita with the agony
of a lost soul. "Will you stop boring me! Will you go 'way! Will you jump
overboard and drown! Do you want me to throw this book at you!"
"If you dare do any——"
Smack! The Revolt of the Angels sailed through the air, missed its
target by the length of a short nose, and bumped cheerfully down the
companionway.
The gray-haired man made an instinctive step backward and then two
cautious steps forward. Ardita jumped to her five feet four and stared at him
defiantly, her gray eyes blazing.
"Keep off!"
"How dare you!" he cried.
"Because I darn please!"
"You've grown unbearable! Your disposition——"
"You've made me that way! No child ever has a bad disposition
unless it's her fancy's fault! Whatever I am, you did it."
Muttering something under his breath her uncle turned and, walking
forward called in a loud voice for the launch. Then he returned to the awning,
where Ardita had again seated herself and resumed her attention to the lemon.
"I am going ashore," he said slowly. "I will be out
again at nine o'clock to-night. When I return we start back to New York, wither
I shall turn you over to your aunt for the rest of your natural, or rather
unnatural, life." He paused and looked at her, and then all at once
something in the utter childness of her beauty seemed to puncture his anger
like an inflated tire, and render him helpless, uncertain, utterly fatuous.
"Ardita," he said not unkindly, "I'm no fool. I've
been round. I know men. And, child, confirmed libertines don't reform until
they're tired—and then they're not themselves—they're husks of
themselves." He looked at her as if expecting agreement, but receiving no
sight or sound of it he continued. "Perhaps the man loves you—that's
possible. He's loved many women and he'll love many more. Less than a month
ago, one month, Ardita, he was involved in a notorious affair with that
red-haired woman, Mimi Merril; promised to give her the diamond bracelet that
the Czar of Russia gave his mother. You know—you read the papers."
"Thrilling scandals by an anxious uncle," yawned Ardita.
"Have it filmed. Wicked clubman making eyes at virtuous flapper. Virtuous
flapper conclusively vamped by his lurid past. Plans to meet him at Palm Beach.
Foiled by anxious uncle."
"Will you tell me why the devil you want to marry him?"
"I'm sure I couldn't say," said Audits shortly.
"Maybe because he's the only man I know, good or bad, who has an
imagination and the courage of his convictions. Maybe it's to get away from the
young fools that spend their vacuous hours pursuing me around the country. But
as for the famous Russian bracelet, you can set your mind at rest on that
score. He's going to give it to me at Palm Beach—if you'll show a little
intelligence."
"How about the—red-haired woman?"
"He hasn't seen her for six months," she said angrily.
"Don't you suppose I have enough pride to see to that? Don't you know by
this time that I can do any darn thing with any darn man I want to?"
She put her chin in the air like the statue of France Aroused, and
then spoiled the pose somewhat by raising the lemon for action.
"Is it the Russian bracelet that fascinates you?"
"No, I'm merely trying to give you the sort of argument that
would appeal to your intelligence. And I wish you'd go 'way," she said,
her temper rising again. "You know I never change my mind. You've been
boring me for three days until I'm about to go crazy. I won't go ashore! Won't!
Do you hear? Won't!"
"Very well," he said, "and you won't go to Palm
Beach either. Of all the selfish, spoiled, uncontrolled disagreeable,
impossible girl I have——"
Splush! The half-lemon caught him in the neck. Simultaneously came
a hail from over the side.
"The launch is ready, Mr. Farnam."
Too full of words and rage to speak, Mr. Farnam cast one utterly
condemning glance at his niece and, turning, ran swiftly down the ladder.
II
Five o'clock robed down from the sun and plumped soundlessly into
the sea. The golden collar widened into a glittering island; and a faint breeze
that had been playing with the edges of the awning and swaying one of the
dangling blue slippers became suddenly freighted with song. It was a chorus of
men in close harmony and in perfect rhythm to an accompanying sound of oars
dealing the blue writers. Ardita lifted her head and listened.
"Carrots and Peas,
Beans on their knees,
Pigs in the seas,
Lucky fellows!
Blow us a breeze,
Blow us a breeze,
Blow us a breeze,
With your bellows."
Ardita's brow wrinkled in astonishment. Sitting very still she
listened eagerly as the chorus took up a second verse.
"Onions and beans,
Marshalls and Deans,
Goldbergs and Greens
And Costellos.
Blow us a breeze,
Blow us a breeze,
Blow us a breeze,
With your bellows."
With an exclamation she tossed her book to the desk, where it
sprawled at a straddle, and hurried to the rail. Fifty feet away a large
rowboat was approaching containing seven men, six of them rowing and one
standing up in the stern keeping time to their song with an orchestra leader's
baton.
"Oysters and Rocks,
Sawdust and socks,
Who could make clocks
Out of cellos?——"
The leader's eyes suddenly rested on Ardita, who was leaning over
the rail spellbound with curiosity. He made a quick movement with his baton and
the singing instantly ceased. She saw that he was the only white man in the
boat—the six rowers were negroes.
"Narcissus ahoy!" he called politely.
"What's the idea of all the discord?" demanded Ardita
cheerfully. "Is this the varsity crew from the county nut farm?"
By this time the boat was scraping the side of the yacht and a
great bulking negro in the bow turned round and grasped the ladder. Thereupon
the leader left his position in the stern and before Ardita had realized his
intention he ran up the ladder and stood breathless before her on the deck.
"The women and children will be spared!" he said
briskly. "All crying babies will be immediately drowned and all males put
in double irons!" Digging her hands excitedly down into the pockets of her
dress Ardita stared at him, speechless with astonishment. He was a young man
with a scornful mouth and the bright blue eyes of a healthy baby set in a dark
sensitive face. His hair was pitch black, damp and curly—the hair of a Grecian
statue gone brunette. He was trimly built, trimly dressed, and graceful as an
agile quarter-back.
"Well, I'll be a son of a gun!" she said dazedly.
They eyed each other coolly.
"Do you surrender the ship?"
"Is this an outburst of wit?" demanded Ardita. "Are
you an idiot—or just being initiated to some fraternity?"
"I asked you if you surrendered the ship."
"I thought the country was dry," said Ardita
disdainfully. "Have you been drinking finger-nail enamel? You better get
off this yacht!"
"What?" the young man's voice expressed incredulity.
"Get off the yacht! You heard me!"
He looked at her for a moment as if considering what she had said.
"No," said his scornful mouth slowly; "No, I won't
get off the yacht. You can get off if you wish."
Going to the rail be gave a curt command and immediately the crew
of the rowboat scrambled up the ladder and ranged themselves in line before
him, a coal-black and burly darky at one end and a miniature mulatto of four
feet nine at to other. They seemed to be uniformly dressed in some sort of blue
costume ornamented with dust, mud, and tatters; over the shoulder of each was
slung a small, heavy-looking white sack, and under their arms they carried
large black cases apparently containing musical instruments.
"'Ten-shun!" commanded the young man, snapping
his own heels together crisply. "Right driss! Front! Step out
here, Babe!"
The smallest Negro took a quick step forward and saluted.
"Take command, go down below, catch the crew and tie 'em
up—all except the engineer. Bring him up to me. Oh, and pile those bags by the
rail there."
"Yas-suh!"
Babe saluted again and wheeling about motioned for the five others
to gather about him. Then after a short whispered consultation they all filed
noiselessly down the companionway.
"Now," said the young man cheerfully to Ardita, who had
witnessed this last scene in withering silence, "if you will swear on your
honor as a flapper—which probably isn't worth much—that you'll keep that
spoiled little mouth of yours tight shut for forty-eight hours, you can row
yourself ashore in our rowboat."
"Otherwise what?"
"Otherwise you're going to sea in a ship."
With a little sigh as for a crisis well passed, the young man sank
into the settee Ardita had lately vacated and stretched his arms lazily. The
corners of his mouth relaxed appreciatively as he looked round at the rich
striped awning, the polished brass, and the luxurious fittings of the deck. His
eye felt on the book, and then on the exhausted lemon.
"Hm," he said, "Stonewall Jackson claimed that
lemon-juice cleared his head. Your head feel pretty clear?"
Ardita disdained to answer.
"Because inside of five minutes you'll have to make a clear
decision whether it's go or stay."
He picked up the book and opened it curiously.
"The Revolt of the Angels. Sounds pretty good. French,
eh?" He stared at her with new interest "You French?"
"No."
"What's your name?"
"Farnam."
"Farnam what?"
"Ardita Farnam."
"Well Ardita, no use standing up there and chewing out the
insides of your mouth. You ought to break those nervous habits while you're
young. Come over here and sit down."
Ardita took a carved jade case from her pocket, extracted a
cigarette and lit it with a conscious coolness, though she knew her hand was
trembling a little; then she crossed over with her supple, swinging walk, and
sitting down in the other settee blew a mouthful of smoke at the awning.
"You can't get me off this yacht," she raid steadily;
"and you haven't got very much sense if you think you'll get far with it.
My uncle'll have wirelesses zigzagging all over this ocean by half past
six."
"Hm."
She looked quickly at his face, caught anxiety stamped there
plainly in the faintest depression of the mouth's corners.
"It's all the same to me," she said, shrugging her
shoulders. "'Tisn't my yacht. I don't mind going for a coupla hours'
cruise. I'll even lend you that book so you'll have something to read on the
revenue boat that takes you up to Sing-Sing."
He laughed scornfully.
"If that's advice you needn't bother. This is part of a plan
arranged before I ever knew this yacht existed. If it hadn't been this one it'd
have been the next one we passed anchored along the coast."
"Who are you?" demanded Ardita suddenly. "And what
are you?"
"You've decided not to go ashore?"
"I never even faintly considered it."
"We're generally known," he said "all seven of us,
as Curtis Carlyle and his Six Black Buddies late of the Winter Garden and the
Midnight Frolic."
"You're singers?"
"We were until to-day. At present, due to those white bags
you see there we're fugitives from justice and if the reward offered for our
capture hasn't by this time reached twenty thousand dollars I miss my
guess."
"What's in the bags?" asked Ardita curiously.
"Well," he said "for the present we'll call
it—mud—Florida mud."
III
Within ten minutes after Curtis Carlyle's interview with a very
frightened engineer the yacht Narcissus was under way, steaming south through a
balmy tropical twilight. The little mulatto, Babe, who seems to have Carlyle's
implicit confidence, took full command of the situation. Mr. Farnam's valet and
the chef, the only members of the crew on board except the engineer, having
shown fight, were now reconsidering, strapped securely to their bunks below.
Trombone Mose, the biggest negro, was set busy with a can of paint obliterating
the name Narcissus from the bow, and substituting the name Hula Hula, and the
others congregated aft and became intently involved in a game of craps.
Having given order for a meal to be prepared and served on deck at
seven-thirty, Carlyle rejoined Ardita, and, sinking back into his settee, half
closed his eyes and fell into a state of profound abstraction.
Ardita scrutinized him carefully—and classed him immediately as a
romantic figure. He gave the effect of towering self-confidence erected on a
slight foundation—just under the surface of each of his decisions she discerned
a hesitancy that was in decided contrast to the arrogant curl of his lips.
"He's not like me," she thought "There's a
difference somewhere." Being a supreme egotist Ardita frequently thought
about herself; never having had her egotism disputed she did it entirely
naturally and with no detraction from her unquestioned charm. Though she was
nineteen she gave the effect of a high-spirited precocious child, and in the
present glow of her youth and beauty all the men and women she had known were
but driftwood on the ripples of her temperament. She had met other egotists—in
fact she found that selfish people bored her rather less than unselfish
people—but as yet there had not been one she had not eventually defeated and
brought to her feet.
But though she recognized an egotist in the settee, she felt none
of that usual shutting of doors in her mind which meant clearing ship for
action; on the contrary her instinct told her that this man was somehow
completely pregnable and quite defenseless. When Ardita defied convention—and
of late it had been her chief amusement—it was from an intense desire to be
herself, and she felt that this man, on the contrary, was preoccupied with his
own defiance.
She was much more interested in him than she was in her own
situation, which affected her as the prospect of a matineé might affect a
ten-year-old child. She had implicit confidence in her ability to take care of
herself under any and all circumstances.
The night deepened. A pale new moon smiled misty-eyed upon the
sea, and as the shore faded dimly out and dark clouds were blown like leaves
along the far horizon a great haze of moonshine suddenly bathed the yacht and
spread an avenue of glittering mail in her swift path. From time to time there
was the bright flare of a match as one of them lighted a cigarette, but except
for the low under-tone of the throbbing engines and the even wash of the waves
about the stern the yacht was quiet as a dream boat star-bound through the
heavens. Round them bowed the smell of the night sea, bringing with it an
infinite languor.
Carlyle broke the silence at last.
"Lucky girl," he sighed "I've always wanted to be
rich—and buy all this beauty."
Ardita yawned.
"I'd rather be you," she said frankly.
"You would—for about a day. But you do seem to possess a lot
of nerve for a flapper."
"I wish you wouldn't call me that."
"Beg your pardon."
"As to nerve," she continued slowly, "it's my one
redeemiug feature. I'm not afraid of anything in heaven or earth."
"Hm, I am."
"To be afraid," said Ardita, "a person has either
to be very great and strong—or else a coward. I'm neither." She paused for
a moment, and eagerness crept into her tone. "But I want to talk about
you. What on earth have you done—and how did you do it?"
"Why?" he demanded cynically. "Going to write a
movie, about me?"
"Go on," she urged. "Lie to me by the moonlight. Do
a fabulous story."
A negro appeared, switched on a string of small lights under the
awning, and began setting the wicker table for supper. And while they ate cold
sliced chicken, salad, artichokes and strawberry jam from the plentiful larder
below, Carlyle began to talk, hesitatingly at first, but eagerly as he saw she
was interested. Ardita scarcely touched her food as she watched his dark young
face—handsome, ironic faintly ineffectual.
He began life as a poor kid in a Tennessee town, he said, so poor
that his people were the only white family in their street. He never remembered
any white children—but there were inevitably a dozen pickaninnies streaming in
his trail, passionate admirers whom he kept in tow by the vividness of his
imagination and the amount of trouble he was always getting them in and out of.
And it seemed that this association diverted a rather unusual musical gift into
a strange channel.
There had been a colored woman named Belle Pope Calhoun who played
the piano at parties given for white children—nice white children that would
have passed Curtis Carlyle with a sniff. But the ragged little "poh
white" used to sit beside her piano by the hour and try to get in an alto
with one of those kazoos that boys hum through. Before he was thirteen he was
picking up a living teasing ragtime out of a battered violin in little cafés
round Nashville. Eight years later the ragtime craze hit the country, and he
took six darkies on the Orpheum circuit. Five of them were boys he had grown up
with; the other was the little mulatto, Babe Divine, who was a wharf nigger
round New York, and long before that a plantation hand in Bermuda, until he
stuck an eight-inch stiletto in his master's back. Almost before Carlyle
realized his good fortune he was on Broadway, with offers of engagements on all
sides, and more money than he had ever dreamed of.
It was about then that a change began in his whole attitude, a
rather curious, embittering change. It was when he realized that he was
spending the golden years of his life gibbering round a stage with a lot of
black men. His act was good of its kind—three trombones, three saxaphones, and
Carlyle's flute—and it was his own peculiar sense of rhythm that made all the
difference; but he began to grow strangely sensitive about it, began to hate
the thought of appearing, dreaded it from day to day.
They were making money—each contract he signed called for more—but
when he went to managers and told them that he wanted to separate from his
sextet and go on as a regular pianist, they laughed at him and told him he was
crazy—it would be an artistic suicide. He used to laugh afterward at the phrase
"artistic suicide." They all used it.
Half a dozen times they played at private dances at three thousand
dollars a night, and it seemed as if these crystallized all his distaste for
his mode of livlihood. They took place in clubs and houses that he couldn't
have gone into in the daytime. After all, he was merely playing to rôle of the
eternal monkey, a sort of sublimated chorus man. He was sick of the very smell
of the theatre, of powder and rouge and the chatter of the greenroom, and the
patronizing approval of the boxes. He couldn't put his heart into it any more.
The idea of a slow approach to the luxury of leisure drove him wild. He was, of
course, progressing toward it, but, like a child, eating his ice-cream so
slowly that he couldn't taste it at all.
He wanted to have a lot of money and time and opportunity to read
and play, and the sort of men and women round him that he could never have—the
kind who, if they thought of him at all, would have considered him rather
contemptible; in short he wanted all those things which he was beginning to
lump under the general head of aristocracy, an aristocracy which it seemed
almost any money could buy except money made as he was making it. He was
twenty-five then, without family or education or any promise that he would
succeed in a business career. He began speculating wildly, and within three
weeks he had lost every cent he had saved.
Then the war came. He went to Plattsburg, and even there his
profession followed him. A brigadier-general called him up to headquarters and
told him he could serve his country better as a band leader—so he spent the war
entertaining celebrities behind the line with a headquarters band. It was not
so bad—except that when the infantry came limping back from the trenches he
wanted to be one of them. The sweat and mud they wore seemed only one of those
ineffable symbols of aristocracy that were forever eluding him.
"It was the private dances that did it. After I came back
from the war the old routine started. We had an offer from a syndicate of
Florida hotels. It was only a question of time then."
He broke off and Ardita looked at him expectantly, but he shook
his head.
"No," he said, "I'm going to tell you about it. I'm
enjoying it too much, and I'm afraid I'd lose a little of that enjoyment if I
shared it with anyone else. I want to hang on to those few breathless, heroic
moments when I stood out before them all and let them know I was more than a
damn bobbing, squawking clown."
From up forward came suddenly the low sound of singing. The
negroes had gathered together on the deck and their voices rose together in a
haunting melody that soared in poignant harmonics toward the moon. And Ardita
listens in enchantment.
"Oh down——
oh down,
Mammy wanna take me down milky way,
Oh down,
oh down,
Pappy say to-morra-a-a-ah
But mammy say to-day,
Yes—mammy say to-day!"
Carlyle sighed and was silent for a moment looking up at the
gathered host of stars blinking like arc-lights in the warm sky. The negroes'
song had died away to a plaintive humming and it seemed as if minute by minute
the brightness and the great silence were increasing until he could almost hear
the midnight toilet of the mermaids as they combed their silver dripping curls
under the moon and gossiped to each other of the fine wrecks they lived on the
green opalescent avenues below.
"You see," said Carlyle softly, "this is the beauty
I want. Beauty has got to be astonishing, astounding—it's got to burst in on
you like a dream, like the exquisite eyes of a girl."
He turned to her, but she was silent.
"You see, don't you, Anita—I mean, Ardita?"
Again she made no answer. She had been sound asleep for some time.
IV
In the dense sun-flooded noon of next day a spot in the sea before
them resolved casually into a green-and-gray islet, apparently composed of a
great granite cliff at its northern end which slanted south through a mile of
vivid coppice and grass to a sandy beach melting lazily into the surf. When
Ardita, reading in her favorite seat, came to the last page of The Revolt of
the Angels, and slamming the book shut looked up and saw it, she gave a little
cry of delight, and called to Carlyle, who was standing moodily by the rail.
"Is this it? Is this where you're going?"
Carlyle shrugged his shoulders carelessly.
"You've got me." He raised his voice and called up to
the acting skipper: "Oh, Babe, is this your island?"
The mulatto's miniature head appeared from round the corner of the
deck-house.
"Yas-suh! This yeah's it."
Carlyle joined Ardita.
"Looks sort of sporting, doesn't it?"
"Yes," she agreed; "but it doesn't look big enough
to be much of a hiding-place."
"You still putting your faith in those wirelesses your uncle
was going to have zigzagging round?"
"No," said Ardita frankly. "I'm all for you. I'd
really like to see you make a get-away."
He laughed.
"You're our Lady Luck. Guess we'll have to keep you with us
as a mascot—for the present anyway."
"You couldn't very well ask me to swim back," she said
coolly. "If you do I'm going to start writing dime novels founded on that
interminable history of your life you gave me last night."
He flushed and stiffened slightly.
"I'm very sorry I bored you."
"Oh, you didn't—until just at the end with some story about
how furious you were because you couldn't dance with the ladies you played
music for."
He rose angrily.
"You have got a darn mean little tongue."
"Excuse me," she said melting into laughter, "but
I'm not used to having men regale me with the story of their life
ambitions—especially if they've lived such deathly platonic lives."
"Why? What do men usually regale you with?"
"Oh, they talk about me," she yawned. "They tell me
I'm the spirit of youth and beauty."
"What do you tell them?"
"Oh, I agree quietly."
"Does every man you meet tell you he loves you?"
Ardita nodded.
"Why shouldn't he? All life is just a progression toward, and
then a recession from, one phrase—'I love you.'"
Carlyle laughed and sat down.
"That's very true. That's—that's not bad. Did you make that
up?"
"Yes—or rather I found it out. It doesn't mean anything
especially. It's just clever."
"It's the sort of remark," he said gravely, "that's
typical of your class."
"Oh," she interrupted impatiently, "don't start
that lecture on aristocracy again! I distrust people who can be intense at this
hour in the morning. It's a mild form of insanity—a sort of breakfast-food jag.
Morning's the time to sleep, swim, and be careless."
Ten minutes later they had swung round in a wide circle as if to
approach the island from the north.
"There's a trick somewhere," commented Ardita
thoughtfully. "He can't mean just to anchor up against this cliff."
They were heading straight in now toward the solid rock, which
must have been well over a hundred feet tall, and not until they were within
fifty yards of it did Ardita see their objective. Then she clapped her hands in
delight. There was a break in the cliff entirely hidden by a curious
overlapping of rock, and through this break the yacht entered and very slowly
traversed a narrow channel of crystal-clear water between high gray walls. Then
they were riding at anchor in a miniature world of green and gold, a gilded bay
smooth as glass and set round with tiny palms, the whole resembling the mirror
lakes and twig trees that children set up in sand piles.
"Not so darned bad!" cried Carlyle excitedly.
"I guess that little coon knows his way round this corner of
the Atlantic."
His exuberance was contagious, and Ardita became quite jubilant.
"It's an absolutely sure-fire hiding-place!"
"Lordy, yes! It's the sort of island you read about."
The rowboat was lowered into the golden lake and they pulled to
shore.
"Come on," said Carlyle as they landed in the slushy
sand, "we'll go exploring."
The fringe of palms was in turn ringed in by a round mile of flat,
sandy country. They followed it south and brushing through a farther rim of
tropical vegetation came out on a pearl-gray virgin beach where Ardita kicked
of her brown golf shoes—she seemed to have permanently abandoned stockings—and
went wading. Then they sauntered back to the yacht, where the indefatigable
Babe had luncheon ready for them. He had posted a lookout on the high cliff to
the north to watch the sea on both sides, though he doubted if the entrance to
the cliff was generally known—he had never even seen a map on which the island
was marked.
"What's its name," asked Ardita—"the island, I
mean?"
"No name 'tall," chuckled Babe. "Reckin she jus'
island, 'at's all."
In the late afternoon they sat with their backs against great
boulders on the highest part of the cliff and Carlyle sketched for her his
vague plans. He was sure they were hot after him by this time. The total
proceeds of the coup he had pulled off and concerning which he still refused to
enlighten her, he estimated as just under a million dollars. He counted on
lying up here several weeks and then setting off southward, keeping well
outside the usual channels of travel rounding the Horn and heading for Callao,
in Peru. The details of coaling and provisioning he was leaving entirely to
Babe who, it seemed, had sailed these seas in every capacity from cabin-boy
aboard a coffee trader to virtual first mate on a Brazillian pirate craft,
whose skipper had long since been hung.
"If he'd been white he'd have been king of South America long
ago," said Carlyle emphatically. "When it comes to intelligence he
makes Booker T. Washington look like a moron. He's got the guile of every race
and nationality whose blood is in his veins, and that's half a dozen or I'm a
liar. He worships me because I'm the only man in the world who can play better
ragtime than he can. We used to sit together on the wharfs down on the New York
water-front, he with a bassoon and me with an oboe, and we'd blend minor keys
in African harmonics a thousand years old until the rats would crawl up the
posts and sit round groaning and squeaking like dogs will in front of a
phonograph."
Ardita roared.
"How you can tell 'em!"
Carlyle grinned.
"I swear that's the gos——"
"What you going to do when you get to Callao?" she
interrupted.
"Take ship for India. I want to be a rajah. I mean it. My
idea is to go up into Afghanistan somewhere, buy up a palace and a reputation,
and then after about five years appear in England with a foreign accent and a
mysterious past. But India first. Do you know, they say that all the gold in
the world drifts very gradually back to India. Something fascinating about that
to me. And I want leisure to read—an immense amount."
"How about after that?"
"Then," he answered defiantly, "comes aristocracy.
Laugh if you want to—but at least you'll have to admit that I know what I
want—which I imagine is more than you do."
"On the contrary," contradicted Ardita, reaching in her
pocket for her cigarette case, "when I met you I was in the midst of a
great uproar of all my friends and relatives because I did know what I
wanted."
"What was it?"
"A man."
He started.
"You mean you were engaged?"
"After a fashion. If you hadn't come aboard I had every
intention of slipping ashore yesterday evening—how long ago it seems—and
meeting him in Palm Beach. He's waiting there for me with a bracelet that once
belonged to Catherine of Russia. Now don't mutter anything about
aristocracy," she put in quickly. "I liked him simply because he had
had an imagination and the utter courage of his convictions."
"But your family disapproved, eh?"
"What there is of it—only a silly uncle and a sillier aunt.
It seems he got into some scandal with a red-haired woman name Mimi
something—it was frightfully exaggerated, he said, and men don't lie to me—and
anyway I didn't care what he'd done; it was the future that counted. And I'd
see to that. When a man's in love with me he doesn't care for other amusements.
I told him to drop her like a hot cake, and he did."
"I feel rather jealous," said Carlyle, frowning—and then
he laughed. "I guess I'll just keep you along with us until we get to
Callao. Then I'll lend you enough money to get back to the States. By that time
you'll have had a chance to think that gentleman over a little more."
"Don't talk to me like that!" fired up Ardita. "I
won't tolerate the parental attitude from anybody! Do you understand me?"
He chuckled and then stopped, rather abashed, as her cold anger seemed to fold
him about and chill him.
"I'm sorry," he offered uncertainly.
"Oh, don't apologize! I can't stand men who say 'I'm sorry'
in that manly, reserved tone. Just shut up!"
A pause ensued, a pause which Carlyle found rather awkward, but
which Ardita seemed not to notice at all as she sat contentedly enjoying her
cigarette and gazing out at the shining sea. After a minute she crawled out on
the rock and lay with her face over the edge looking down. Carlyle, watching
her, reflected how it seemed impossible for her to assume an ungraceful
attitude.
"Oh, look," she cried. "There's a lot of sort of
ledges down there. Wide ones of all different heights."
"We'll go swimming to-night!" she said excitedly.
"By moonlight."
"Wouldn't you rather go in at the beach on the other
end?"
"Not a chance. I like to dive. You can use my uncle's bathing
suit, only it'll fit you like a gunny sack, because he's a very flabby man.
I've got a one-piece that's shocked the natives all along the Atlantic coast
from Biddeford Pool to St. Augustine."
"I suppose you're a shark."
"Yes, I'm pretty good. And I look cute too. A sculptor up at
Rye last summer told me my calves are worth five hundred dollars."
There didn't seem to be any answer to this, so Carlyle was silent,
permitting himself only a discreet interior smile.
V
When the night crept down in shadowy blue and silver they threaded
the shimmering channel in the rowboat and, tying it to a jutting rock, began
climbing the cliff together. The first shelf was ten feet up, wide, and
furnishing a natural diving platform. There they sat down in the bright
moonlight and watched the faint incessant surge of the waters almost stilled
now as the tide set seaward.
"Are you happy?" he asked suddenly.
She nodded.
"Always happy near the sea. You know," she went on,
"I've been thinking all day that you and I are somewhat alike. We're both
rebels—only for different reasons. Two years ago, when I was just eighteen and
you were——"
"Twenty-five."
"——well, we were both conventional successes. I was an
utterly devastating débutante and you were a prosperous musician just
commissioned in the army——"
"Gentleman by act of Congress," he put in ironically.
"Well, at any rate, we both fitted. If our corners were not
rubbed off they were at least pulled in. But deep in us both was something that
made us require more for happiness. I didn't know what I wanted. I went from
man to man, restless, impatient, month by month getting less acquiescent and
more dissatisfied. I used to sit sometimes chewing at the insides of my mouth
and thinking I was going crazy—I had a frightful sense of transiency. I wanted
things now—now—now! Here I was—beautiful—I am, aren't I?"
"Yes," agreed Carlyle tentatively.
Ardita rose suddenly.
"Wait a second. I want to try this delightful-looking
sea."
She walked to the end of the ledge and shot out over the sea,
doubling up in mid-air and then straightening out and entering to water
straight as a blade in a perfect jack-knife dive.
In a minute her voice floated up to him.
"You see, I used to read all day and most of the night. I
began to resent society——"
"Come on up here," he interrupted. "What on earth
are you doing?"
"Just floating round on my back. I'll be up in a minute. Let
me tell you. The only thing I enjoyed was shocking people; wearing something
quite impossible and quite charming to a fancy-dress party, going round with
the fastest men in New York, and getting into some of the most hellish scrapes
imaginable."
The sounds of splashing mingled with her words, and then he heard
her hurried breathing as she began climbing up side to the ledge.
"Go on in!" she called
Obediently he rose and dived. When he emerged, dripping, and made
the climb he found that she was no longer on the ledge, but after a second
frightened he heard her light laughter from another shelf ten feet up. There he
joined her and they both sat quietly for a moment, their arms clasped round
their knees, panting a little from the climb.
"The family were wild," she said suddenly. "They
tried to marry me off. And then when I'd begun to feel that after all life was
scarcely worth living I found something"—her eyes went skyward
exultantly——"I found something!"
Carlyle waited and her words came with a rush.
"Courage—just that; courage as a rule of life, and something
to cling to always. I began to build up this enormous faith in myself. I began
to see that in all my idols in the past some manifestation of courage had
unconsciously been the thing that attracted me. I began separating courage from
the other things of life. All sorts of courage—the beaten, bloody prize-fighter
coming up for more—I used to make men take me to prize-fights; the déclassé
woman sailing through a nest of cats and looking at them as if they were mud
under her feet; the liking what you like always; the utter disregard for other
people's opinions—just to live as I liked always and to die in my own way— Did
you bring up the cigarettes?"
He handed one over and held a match for her gently.
"Still," Ardita continued, "the men kept
gathering—old men and young men, my mental and physical inferiors, most of
them, but all intensely desiring to have me—to own this rather magnificent
proud tradition I'd built up round me. Do you see?"
"Sort of. You never were beaten and you never
apologized."
"Never!"
She sprang to the edge, poised for a moment like a crucified
figure against the sky; then describing a dark parabola plunked without a slash
between two silver ripples twenty feet below.
Her voice floated up to him again.
"And courage to me meant ploughing through that dull gray
mist that comes down on life—not only overriding people and circumstances but
overriding the bleakness of living. A sort of insistence on the value of life
and the worth of transient things."
She was climbing up now, and at her last words her head, with the
damp yellow hair slicked symmetrically back appeared on his level.
"All very well," objected Carlyle. "You can call it
courage, but your courage is really built, after all, on a pride of birth. You
were bred to that defiant attitude. On my gray days even courage is one of the
things that's gray and lifeless."
She was sitting near the edge, hugging her knees and gazing
abstractedly at the white moon; he was farther back, crammed like a grotesque
god into a niche in the rock.
"I don't want to sound like Pollyanna," she began,
"but you haven't grasped me yet. My courage is faith—faith in the eternal
resilience of me—that joy'll come back, and hope and spontaneity. And I feel
that till it does I've got to keep my lips shut and my chin high, and my eyes
wide—not necessarily any silly smiling. Oh, I've been through hell without a
whine quite often—and the female hell is deadlier than the male."
"But supposing," suggested Carlyle, "that before
joy and hope and all that came back the curtain was drawn on you for
good?"
Ardita rose, and going to the wall climbed with some difficulty to
the next ledge, another ten or fifteen feet above.
"Why," she called back "then I'd have won!"
He edged out till he could see her.
"Better not dive from there! You'll break your back," he
said quickly.
She laughed.
"Not I!"
Slowly she spread her arms and stood there swan-like, radiating a
pride in her young perfection that lit a warm glow in Carlyle's heart.
"We're going through the black air with our arms wide and our
feet straight out behind like a dolphin's tail, and we're going to think we'll
never hit the silver down there till suddenly it'll be all warm round us and
full of little kissing, caressing waves."
Then she was in the air, and Carlyle involuntarily held his
breath. He had not realized that the dive was nearly forty feet. It seemed an
eternity before he heard the swift compact sound as she reached the sea.
And it was with his glad sigh of relief when her light watery
laughter curled up the side of the cliff and into his anxious ears that he knew
he loved her.
VI
Time, having no axe to grind, showered down upon them three days
of afternoons. When the sun cleared the port-hole of Ardita's cabin an hour
after dawn she rose cheerily, donned her bathing-suit, and went up on deck. The
negroes would leave their work when they saw her, and crowd, chuckling and
chattering, to the rail as she floated, an agile minnow, on and under the
surface of the clear water. Again in the cool of the afternoon she would
swim—and loll and smoke with Carlyle upon the cliff; or else they would lie on
their sides in the sands of the southern beach, talking little, but watching
the day fade colorfully and tragically into the infinite langour of a tropical
evening.
And with the long, sunny hours Ardita's idea of the episode as
incidental, madcap, a sprig of romance in a desert of reality, gradually left
her. She dreaded the time when he would strike off southward; she dreaded all
the eventualities that presented themselves to her; thoughts were suddenly
troublesome and decisions odious. Had prayers found place in the pagan rituals
of her soul she would have asked of life only to be unmolested for a while,
lazily acquiescent to the ready, naïf flow of Carlyle's ideas, his vivid boyish
imagination, and the vein of monomania that seemed to run crosswise through his
temperament and colored his every action.
But this is not a story of two on an island, nor concerned
primarily with love bred of isolation. It is merely the presentation of two
personalities, and its idyllic setting among the palms of the Gulf Stream is
quite incidental. Most of us are content to exist and breed and fight for the
right to do both, and the dominant idea, the foredoomed attest to control one's
destiny, is reserved for the fortunate or unfortunate few. To me the
interesting thing about Ardita is the courage that will tarnish with her beauty
and youth.
"Take me with you," she said late one night as they sat
lazily in the grass under the shadowy spreading palms. The negroes had brought
ashore their musical instruments, and the sound of weird ragtime was drifting
softly over on the warm breath of the night. "I'd love to reappear in ten
years, as a fabulously wealthy high-caste Indian lady," she continued.
Carlyle looked at her quickly.
"You can, you know."
She laughed.
"Is it a proposal of marriage? Extra! Ardita Farnam becomes
pirate's bride. Society girl kidnapped by ragtime bank robber."
"It wasn't a bank."
"What was it? Why won't you tell me?"
"I don't want to break down your illusions."
"My dear man, I have no illusions about you."
"I mean your illusions about yourself."
She looked up in surprise.
"About myself! What on earth have I got to do with whatever
stray felonies you've committed?"
"That remains to be seen."
She reached over and patted his hand.
"Dear Mr. Curtis Carlyle," she said softly, "are
you in love with me?"
"As if it mattered."
"But it does—because I think I'm in love with you."
He looked at her ironically.
"Thus swelling your January total to half a dozen," he
suggested. "Suppose I call your bluff and ask you to come to India with
me?"
"Shall I?"
He shrugged his shoulders.
"We can get married in Callao."
"What sort of life can you offer me? I don't mean that
unkindly, but seriously; what would become of me if the people who want that
twenty-thousand-dollar reward ever catch up with you?"
"I thought you weren't afraid."
"I never am—but I won't throw my life away just to show one
man I'm not."
"I wish you'd been poor. Just a little poor girl dreaming
over a fence in a warm cow country."
"Wouldn't it have been nice?"
"I'd have enjoyed astonishing you—watching your eyes open on
things. If you only wanted things! Don't you see?"
"I know—like girls who stare into the windows of
jewelry-stores."
"Yes—and want the big oblong watch that's platinum and has
diamonds all round the edge. Only you'd decide it was too expensive and choose
one of white gold for a hundred dollar. Then I'd say: 'Expensive? I should say
not!' And we'd go into the store and pretty soon the platinum one would be
gleaming on your wrist."
"That sounds so nice and vulgar—and fun, doesn't it?"
murmured Ardita.
"Doesn't it? Can't you see us travelling round and spending
money right and left, and being worshipped by bell-boys and waiters? Oh,
blessed are the simple rich for they inherit the earth!"
"I honestly wish we were that way."
"I love you, Ardita," he said gently.
Her face lost its childish look for moment and became oddly grave.
"I love to be with you," she said, "more than with
any man I've ever met. And I like your looks and your dark old hair, and the
way you go over the side of the rail when we come ashore. In fact, Curtis
Carlyle, I like all the things you do when you're perfectly natural. I think
you've got nerve and you know how I feel about that. Sometimes when you're
around I've been tempted to kiss you suddenly and tell you that you were just
an idealistic boy with a lot of caste nonsense in his head. Perhaps if I were
just a little bit older and a little more bored I'd go with you. As it is, I
think I'll go back and marry—that other man."
Over across the silver lake the figures of the negroes writhed and
squirmed in the moonlight like acrobats who, having been too long inactive,
must go through their tacks from sheer surplus energy. In single file they
marched, weaving in concentric circles, now with their heads thrown back, now
bent over their instruments like piping fauns. And from trombone and saxaphone
ceaselessly whined a blended melody, sometimes riotous and jubilant, sometimes
haunting and plaintive as a death-dance from the Congo's heart.
"Let's dance," cried Ardita. "I can't sit still
with that perfect jazz going on."
Taking her hand he led her out into a broad stretch of hard sandy soil
that the moon flooded with great splendor. They floated out like drifting moths
under the rich hazy light, and as the fantastic symphony wept and exulted and
wavered and despaired Ardita's last sense of reality dropped away, and she
abandoned her imagination to the dreamy summer scents of tropical flowers and
the infinite starry spaces overhead, feeling that if she opened her eyes it
would be to find herself dancing with a ghost in a land created by her own
fancy.
"This is what I should call an exclusive private dance,"
he whispered.
"I feel quite mad—but delightfully mad!"
"We're enchanted. The shades of unnumbered generations of
cannibals are watching us from high up on the side of the cliff there."
"And I'll bet the cannibal women are saying that we dance too
close, and that it was immodest of me to come without my nose-ring."
They both laughed softly—and then their laughter died as over
across the lake they heard the trombones stop in the middle of a bar, and the
saxaphones give a startled moan and fade out.
"What's the matter?" called Carlyle.
After a moment's silence they made out the dark figure of a man
rounding the silver lake at a run. As he came closer they saw it was Babe in a
state of unusual excitement. He drew up before them and gasped out his news in
a breath.
"Ship stan'in' off sho' 'bout half a mile suh. Mose, he uz on
watch, he say look's if she's done ancho'd."
"A ship—what kind of a ship?" demanded Carlyle
anxiously.
Dismay was in his voice, and Ardita's heart gave a sudden wrench
as she saw his whole face suddenly droop.
"He say he don't know, suh."
"Are they landing a boat?"
"No, suh."
"We'll go up," said Carlyle.
They ascended the hill in silence, Ardita's hand still resting in
Carlyle's as it had when they finished dancing. She felt it clinch nervously
from time to time as though he were unaware of the contact, but though he hurt
her she made no attempt to remove it. It seemed an hour's climb before they
reached the top and crept cautiously across the silhouetted plateau to the edge
of the cliff. After one short look Carlyle involuntarily gave a little cry. It
was a revenue boat with six-inch guns mounted fore and aft.
"They know!" he said with a short intake of breath.
"They know! They picked up the trail somewhere."
"Are you sure they know about the channel? They may be only
standing by to take a look at the island in the morning. From where they are
they couldn't see the opening in the cliff."
"They could with field-glasses," he said hopelessly. He
looked at his wrist-watch. "It's nearly two now. They won't do anything
until dawn, that's certain. Of course there's always the faint possibility that
they're waiting for some other ship to join; or for a coaler."
"I suppose we may as well stay right here."
The hour passed and they lay there side by side, very silently,
their chins in their hands like dreaming children. In back of them squatted the
negroes, patient, resigned, acquiescent, announcing now and then with sonorous
snores that not even the presence of danger could subdue their unconquerable
African craving for sleep.
Just before five o'clock Babe approached Carlyle. There were half
a dozen rifles aboard the Narcissus he said. Had it been decided to offer no
resistance?
A pretty good fight might be made, he thought, if they worked out
some plan.
Carlyle laughed and shook his head.
"That isn't a Spic army out there, Babe. That's a revenue
boat. It'd be like a bow and arrow trying to fight a machine-gun. If you want
to bury those bags somewhere and take a chance on recovering them later, go on
and do it. But it won't work—they'd dig this island over from one end to the
other. It's a lost battle all round, Babe."
Babe inclined his head silently and turned away, and Carlyle's
voice was husky as he turned to Ardita.
"There's the best friend I ever had. He'd die for me, and be
proud to, if I'd let him."
"You've given up?"
"I've no choice. Of course there's always one way out—the
sure way—but that can wait. I wouldn't miss my trial for anything—it'll be an
interesting experiment in notoriety. 'Miss Farnam testifies that the pirate's
attitude to her was at all times that of a gentleman.'"
"Don't!" she said. "I'm awfully sorry."
When the color faded from the sky and lustreless blue changed to
leaden gray a commotion was visible on the ship's deck, and they made out a
group of officers clad in white duck, gathered near the rail. They had
field-glasses in their hands and were attentively examining the islet.
"It's all up," said Carlyle grimly.
"Damn," whispered Ardita. She felt tears gathering in
her eyes "We'll go back to the yacht," he said. "I prefer that
to being hunted out up here like a 'possum."
Leaving the plateau they descended the hill, and reaching the lake
were rowed out to the yacht by the silent negroes. Then, pale and weary, they
sank into the settees and waited.
Half an hour later in the dim gray light the nose of the revenue
boat appeared in the channel and stopped, evidently fearing that the bay might
be too shallow. From the peaceful look of the yacht, the man and the girl in
the settees, and the negroes lounging curiously against the rail, they
evidently judged that there would be no resistance, for two boats were lowered
casually over the side, one containing an officer and six bluejackets, and the
other, four rowers and in the stern two gray-haired men in yachting flannels.
Ardita and Carlyle stood up, and half unconsciously started toward each other.
Then he paused and putting his hand suddenly into his pocket he
pulled out a round, glittering object and held it out to her.
"What is it?" she asked wonderingly.
"I'm not positive, but I think from the Russian inscription
inside that it's your promised bracelet."
"Where—where on earth——"
"It came out of one of those bags. You see, Curtis Carlyle
and his Six Black Buddies, in the middle of their performance in the tea-room
of the hotel at Palm Beach, suddenly changed their instruments for automatics
and held up the crowd. I took this bracelet from a pretty, overrouged woman
with red hair."
Ardita frowned and then smiled.
"So that's what you did! You have got nerve!"
He bowed.
"A well-known bourgeois quality," he said.
And then dawn slanted dynamically across the deck and flung the
shadows reeling into gray corners. The dew rose and turned to golden mist, thin
as a dream, enveloping them until they seemed gossamer relics of the late
night, infinitely transient and already fading. For a moment sea and sky were
breathless, and dawn held a pink hand over the young mouth of life—then from
out in the lake came the complaint of a rowboat and the swish of oars.
Suddenly against the golden furnace low in the east their two
graceful figures melted into one, and he was kissing her spoiled young mouth.
"It's a sort of glory," he murmured after a second.
She smiled up at him.
"Happy, are you?"
Her sigh was a benediction—an ecstatic surety that she was youth
and beauty now as much as she would ever know. For another instant life was
radiant and time a phantom and their strength eternal—then there was a bumping,
scraping sound as the rowboat scraped alongside.
Up the ladder scrambled the two gray-haired men, the officer and
two of the sailors with their hands on their revolvers. Mr. Farnam folded his
arms and stood looking at his niece.
"So," he said nodding his head slowly.
With a sigh her arms unwound from Carlyle's neck, and her eyes,
transfigured and far away, fell upon the boarding party. Her uncle saw her
upper lip slowly swell into that arrogant pout he knew so well.
"So," he repeated savagely. "So this is your idea
of—of romance. A runaway affair, with a high-seas pirate."
Ardita glanced at him carelessly.
"What an old fool you are!" she said quietly.
"Is that the best you can say for yourself?"
"No," she said as if considering. "No, there's
something else. There's that well-known phrase with which I have ended most of
our conversations for the past few years—'Shut up!'"
And with that she turned, included the two old men, the officer,
and the two sailors in a curt glance of contempt, and walked proudly down the
companionway.
But had she waited an instant longer she would have heard a sound
from her uncle quite unfamiliar in most of their interviews. He gave vent to a
whole-hearted amused chuckle, in which the second old man joined.
The latter turned briskly to Carlyle, who had been regarding this
scene with an air of cryptic amusement.
"Well Toby," he said genially, "you incurable,
hare-brained romantic chaser of rainbows, did you find that she was the person
you wanted?"
Carlyle smiled confidently.
"Why—naturally," he said "I've been perfectly sure
ever since I first heard tell of her wild career. That'd why I had Babe send up
the rocket last night."
"I'm glad you did," said Colonel Moreland gravely.
"We've been keeping pretty close to you in case you should have trouble
with those six strange niggers. And we hoped we'd find you two in some such
compromising position," he sighed. "Well, set a crank to catch a
crank!"
"Your father and I sat up all night hoping for the best—or
perhaps it's the worst. Lord knows you're welcome to her, my boy. She's run me
crazy. Did you give her the Russian bracelet my detective got from that Mimi
woman?"
Carlyle nodded.
"Sh!" he said. "She's coming on deck."
Ardita appeared at the head of the companionway and gave a quick
involuntary glance at Carlyle's wrists. A puzzled look passed across her face.
Back aft the negroes had begun to sing, and the cool lake, fresh with dawn,
echoed serenely to their low voices.
"Ardita," said Carlyle unsteadily.
She swayed a step toward him.
"Ardita," he repeated breathlessly, "I've got to
tell you the—the truth. It was all a plant, Ardita. My name isn't Carlyle. It's
Moreland, Toby Moreland. The story was invented, Ardita, invented out of thin
Florida air."
She stared at him, bewildered, amazement, disbelief, and anger
flowing in quick waves across her face. The three men held their breaths.
Moreland, Senior, took a step toward her; Mr. Farnam's mouth dropped a little
open as he waited, panic-stricken, for the expected crash.
But it did not come. Ardita's face became suddenly radiant, and
with a little laugh she went swiftly to young Moreland and looked up at him
without a trace of wrath in her gray eyes.
"Will you swear," she said quietly "That it was
entirely a product of your own brain?"
"I swear," said young Moreland eagerly.
She drew his head down and kissed him gently.
"What an imagination!" she said softly and almost
enviously. "I want you to lie to me just as sweetly as you know how for
the rest of my life."
The negroes' voices floated drowsily back, mingled in an air that
she had heard them singing before.
"Time is a thief;
Gladness and grief
Cling to the leaf
As it yellows——"
"What was in the bags?" she asked softly.
"Florida mud," he answered. "That was one of the
two true things I told you."
"Perhaps I can guess the other one," she said; and
reaching up on her tiptoes she kissed him softly in the illustration.
The sunlight dripped
over the house like golden paint over an art jar, and the freckling shadows
here and there only intensified the rigor of the bath of light. The Butterworth
and Larkin houses flanking were entrenched behind great stodgy trees; only the
Happer house took the full sun, and all day long faced the dusty road-street
with a tolerant kindly patience. This was the city of Tarleton in southernmost
Georgia, September afternoon.
Up in her bedroom window Sally Carrol Happer rested her
nineteen-year-old chin on a fifty-two-year-old sill and watched Clark Darrow's
ancient Ford turn the corner. The car was hot—being partly metallic it retained
all the heat it absorbed or evolved—and Clark Darrow sitting bolt upright at
the wheel wore a pained, strained expression as though he considered himself a
spare part, and rather likely to break. He laboriously crossed two dust ruts,
the wheels squeaking indignantly at the encounter, and then with a terrifying
expression he gave the steering-gear a final wrench and deposited self and car
approximately in front of the Happer steps. There was a heaving sound, a
death-rattle, followed by a short silence; and then the air was rent by a
startling whistle.
Sally Carrol gazed down sleepily. She started to yawn, but finding
this quite impossible unless she raised her chin from the window-sill, changed
her mind and continued silently to regard the car, whose owner sat brilliantly
if perfunctorily at attention as he waited for an answer to his signal. After a
moment the whistle once more split the dusty air.
"Good mawnin'."
With difficulty Clark twisted his tall body round and bent a
distorted glance on the window.
"Tain't mawnin', Sally Carrol."
"Isn't it, sure enough?"
"What you doin'?"
"Eatin' 'n apple."
"Come on go swimmin'—want to?"
"Reckon so."
"How 'bout hurryin' up?"
"Sure enough."
Sally Carrol sighed voluminously and raised herself with profound
inertia from the floor where she had been occupied in alternately destroyed
parts of a green apple and painting paper dolls for her younger sister. She
approached a mirror, regarded her expression with a pleased and pleasant
languor, dabbed two spots of rouge on her lips and a grain of powder on her
nose, and covered her bobbed corn-colored hair with a rose-littered sunbonnet.
Then she kicked over the painting water, said, "Oh, damn!"—but let it
lay—and left the room.
"How you, Clark?" she inquired a minute later as she
slipped nimbly over the side of the car.
"Mighty fine, Sally Carrol."
"Where we go swimmin'?"
"Out to Walley's Pool. Told Marylyn we'd call by an' get her
an' Joe Ewing."
Clark was dark and lean, and when on foot was rather inclined to
stoop. His eyes were ominous and his expression somewhat petulant except when
startlingly illuminated by one of his frequent smiles. Clark had "a
income"—just enough to keep himself in ease and his car in gasolene—and he
had spent the two years since he graduated from Georgia Tech in dozing round
the lazy streets of his home town, discussing how he could best invest his
capital for an immediate fortune.
Hanging round he found not at all difficult; a crowd of little
girls had grown up beautifully, the amazing Sally Carrol foremost among them;
and they enjoyed being swum with and danced with and made love to in the
flower-filled summery evenings—and they all liked Clark immensely. When
feminine company palled there were half a dozen other youths who were always
just about to do something, and meanwhile were quite willing to join him in a
few holes of golf, or a game of billiards, or the consumption of a quart of
"hard yella licker." Every once in a while one of these
contemporaries made a farewell round of calls before going up to New York or
Philadelphia or Pittsburgh to go into business, but mostly they just stayed
round in this languid paradise of dreamy skies and firefly evenings and noisy
nigger street fairs—and especially of gracious, soft-voiced girls, who were
brought up on memories instead of money.
The Ford having been excited into a sort of restless resentful
life Clark and Sally Carrol rolled and rattled down Valley Avenue into
Jefferson Street, where the dust road became a pavement; along opiate Millicent
Place, where there were half a dozen prosperous, substantial mansions; and on
into the down-town section. Driving was perilous here, for it was shopping
time; the population idled casually across the streets and a drove of
low-moaning oxen were being urged along in front of a placid street-car; even
the shops seemed only yawning their doors and blinking their windows in the
sunshine before retiring into a state of utter and finite coma.
"Sally Carrol," said Clark suddenly, "it a fact
that you're engaged?"
She looked at him quickly.
"Where'd you hear that?"
"Sure enough, you engaged?"
"'At's a nice question!"
"Girl told me you were engaged to a Yankee you met up in
Asheville last summer."
Sally Carrol sighed.
"Never saw such an old town for rumors."
"Don't marry a Yankee, Sally Carrol. We need you round
here."
Sally Carrol was silent a moment.
"Clark," she demanded suddenly, "who on earth shall
I marry?"
"I offer my services."
"Honey, you couldn't support a wife," she answered
cheerfully. "Anyway, I know you too well to fall in love with you."
"'At doesn't mean you ought to marry a Yankee," he
persisted.
"S'pose I love him?"
He shook his head.
"You couldn't. He'd be a lot different from us, every
way."
He broke off as he halted the car in front of a rambling,
dilapidated house. Marylyn Wade and Joe Ewing appeared in the doorway.
"'Lo Sally Carrol."
"Hi!"
"How you-all?"
"Sally Carrol," demanded Marylyn as they started of
again, "you engaged?"
"Lawdy, where'd all this start? Can't I look at a man 'thout
everybody in town engagin' me to him?"
Clark stared straight in front of him at a bolt on the clattering
wind-shield.
"Sally Carrol," he said with a curious intensity,
"don't you 'like us?"
"What?"
"Us down here?"
"Why, Clark, you know I do. I adore all you boys."
"Then why you gettin' engaged to a Yankee?"
"Clark, I don't know. I'm not sure what I'll do, but—well, I
want to go places and see people. I want my mind to grow. I want to live where
things happen on a big scale."
"What you mean?"
"Oh, Clark, I love you, and I love Joe here and Ben Arrot,
and you-all, but you'll—you'll——"
"We'll all be failures?"
"Yes. I don't mean only money failures, but just sort of—of
ineffectual and sad, and—oh, how can I tell you?"
"You mean because we stay here in Tarleton?"
"Yes, Clark; and because you like it and never want to change
things or think or go ahead."
He nodded and she reached over and pressed his hand.
"Clark," she said softly, "I wouldn't change you
for the world. You're sweet the way you are. The things that'll make you fail
I'll love always—the living in the past, the lazy days and nights you have, and
all your carelessness and generosity."
"But you're goin' away?"
"Yes—because I couldn't ever marry you. You've a place in my
heart no one else ever could have, but tied down here I'd get restless. I'd
feel I was—wastin' myself. There's two sides to me, you see. There's the sleepy
old side you love an' there's a sort of energy—the feeling that makes me do
wild things. That's the part of me that may be useful somewhere, that'll last
when I'm not beautiful any more."
She broke of with characteristic suddenness and sighed, "Oh,
sweet cooky!" as her mood changed.
Half closing her eyes and tipping back her head till it rested on
the seat-back she let the savory breeze fan her eyes and ripple the fluffy
curls of her bobbed hair. They were in the country now, hurrying between
tangled growths of bright-green coppice and grass and tall trees that sent
sprays of foliage to hang a cool welcome over the road. Here and there they
passed a battered negro cabin, its oldest white-haired inhabitant smoking a
corncob pipe beside the door, and half a dozen scantily clothed pickaninnies
parading tattered dolls on the wild-grown grass in front. Farther out were lazy
cotton-fields where even the workers seemed intangible shadows lent by the sun
to the earth, not for toil, but to while away some age-old tradition in the
golden September fields. And round the drowsy picturesqueness, over the trees
and shacks and muddy rivers, flowed the heat, never hostile, only comforting,
like a great warm nourishing bosom for the infant earth.
"Sally Carrol, we're here!"
"Poor chile's soun' asleep."
"Honey, you dead at last outa sheer laziness?"
"Water, Sally Carrol! Cool water waitin' for you!"
Her eyes opened sleepily.
"Hi!" she murmured, smiling.
II
In November Harry Bellamy, tall, broad, and brisk, came down from
his Northern city to spend four days. His intention was to settle a matter that
had been hanging fire since he and Sally Carrol had met in Asheville, North
Carolina, in midsummer. The settlement took only a quiet afternoon and an
evening in front of a glowing open fire, for Harry Bellamy had everything she
wanted; and, beside, she loved him—loved him with that side of her she kept
especially for loving. Sally Carrol had several rather clearly defined sides.
On his last afternoon they walked, and she found their steps
tending half-unconsciously toward one of her favorite haunts, the cemetery.
When it came in sight, gray-white and golden-green under the cheerful late sun,
she paused, irresolute, by the iron gate.
"Are you mournful by nature, Harry?" she asked with a
faint smile.
"Mournful? Not I."
"Then let's go in here. It depresses some folks, but I like
it."
They passed through the gateway and followed a path that led
through a wavy valley of graves—dusty-gray and mouldy for the fifties; quaintly
carved with flowers and jars for the seventies; ornate and hideous for the
nineties, with fat marble cherubs lying in sodden sleep on stone pillows, and great
impossible growths of nameless granite flowers.
Occasionally they saw a kneeling figure with tributary flowers,
but over most of the graves lay silence and withered leaves with only the
fragrance that their own shadowy memories could waken in living minds.
They reached the top of a hill where they were fronted by a tall,
round head-stone, freckled with dark spots of damp and half grown over with
vines.
"Margery Lee," she read; "1844-1873. Wasn't she
nice? She died when she was twenty-nine. Dear Margery Lee," she added
softly. "Can't you see her, Harry?"
"Yes, Sally Carrol."
He felt a little hand insert itself into his.
"She was dark, I think; and she always wore her hair with a
ribbon in it, and gorgeous hoop-skirts of Alice blue and old rose."
"Yes."
"Oh, she was sweet, Harry! And she was the sort of girl born
to stand on a wide, pillared porch and welcome folks in. I think perhaps a lot
of men went away to war meanin' to come back to her; but maybe none of 'em ever
did."
He stooped down close to the stone, hunting for any record of
marriage.
"There's nothing here to show."
"Of course not. How could there be anything there better than
just 'Margery Lee,' and that eloquent date?"
She drew close to him and an unexpected lump came into his throat
as her yellow hair brushed his cheek.
"You see how she was, don't you Harry?"
"I see," he agreed gently. "I see through your
precious eyes. You're beautiful now, so I know she must have been."
Silent and close they stood, and he could feel her shoulders
trembling a little. An ambling breeze swept up the hill and stirred the brim of
her floppidy hat.
"Let's go down there!"
She was pointing to a flat stretch on the other side of the hill
where along the green turf were a thousand grayish-white crosses stretching in
endless, ordered rows like the stacked arms of a battalion.
"Those are the Confederate dead," said Sally Carrol
simply.
They walked along and read the inscriptions, always only a name
and a date, sometimes quite indecipherable.
"The last row is the saddest—see, 'way over there. Every
cross has just a date on it and the word 'Unknown.'"
She looked at him and her eyes brimmed with tears.
"I can't tell you how real it is to me, darling—if you don't
know."
"How you feel about it is beautiful to me."
"No, no, it's not me, it's them—that old time that I've tried
to have live in me. These were just men, unimportant evidently or they wouldn't
have been 'unknown'; but they died for the most beautiful thing in the
world—the dead South. You see," she continued, her voice still husky, her
eyes glistening with tears, "people have these dreams they fasten onto
things, and I've always grown up with that dream. It was so easy because it was
all dead and there weren't any disillusions comin' to me. I've tried in a way
to live up to those past standards of noblesse oblige—there's just the last
remnants of it, you know, like the roses of an old garden dying all round
us—streaks of strange courtliness and chivalry in some of these boys an'
stories I used to hear from a Confederate soldier who lived next door, and a
few old darkies. Oh, Harry, there was something, there was something! I
couldn't ever make you understand but it was there."
"I understand," he assured her again quietly.
Sally Carol smiled and dried her eyes on the tip of a handkerchief
protruding from his breast pocket.
"You don't feel depressed, do you, lover? Even when I cry I'm
happy here, and I get a sort of strength from it."
Hand in hand they turned and walked slowly away. Finding soft
grass she drew him down to a seat beside her with their backs against the
remnants of a low broken wall.
"Wish those three old women would clear out," he
complained. "I want to kiss you, Sally Carrol."
"Me, too."
They waited impatiently for the three bent figures to move off,
and then she kissed him until the sky seemed to fade out and all her smiles and
tears to vanish in an ecstasy of eternal seconds.
Afterward they walked slowly back together, while on the corners
twilight played at somnolent black-and-white checkers with the end of day.
"You'll be up about mid-January," he said, "and
you've got to stay a month at least. It'll be slick. There's a winter carnival
on, and if you've never really seen snow it'll be like fairy-land to you.
There'll be skating and skiing and tobogganing and sleigh-riding, and all sorts
of torchlight parades on snow-shoes. They haven't had one for years, so they're
gong to make it a knock-out."
"Will I be cold, Harry?" she asked suddenly.
"You certainly won't. You may freeze your nose, but you won't
be shivery cold. It's hard and dry, you know."
"I guess I'm a summer child. I don't like any cold I've ever
seen."
She broke off and they were both silent for a minute.
"Sally Carol," he said very slowly, "what do you
say to—March?"
"I say I love you."
"March?"
"March, Harry."
III
All night in the Pullman it was very cold. She rang for the porter
to ask for another blanket, and when he couldn't give her one she tried vainly,
by squeezing down into the bottom of her berth and doubling back the
bedclothes, to snatch a few hours' sleep. She wanted to look her best in the
morning.
She rose at six and sliding uncomfortably into her clothes
stumbled up to the diner for a cup of coffee. The snow had filtered into the
vestibules and covered the door with a slippery coating. It was intriguing this
cold, it crept in everywhere. Her breath was quite visible and she blew into
the air with a naïve enjoyment. Seated in the diner she stared out the window
at white hills and valleys and scattered pines whose every branch was a green
platter for a cold feast of snow. Sometimes a solitary farmhouse would fly by,
ugly and bleak and lone on the white waste; and with each one she had an
instant of chill compassion for the souls shut in there waiting for spring.
As she left the diner and swayed back into the Pullman she
experienced a surging rush of energy and wondered if she was feeling the
bracing air of which Harry had spoken. This was the North, the North—her land
now!
"Then blow, ye winds, heighho!
A-roving I will go,"
she chanted exultantly
to herself.
"What's 'at?" inquired the porter politely.
"I said: 'Brush me off.'"
The long wires of the telegraph poles doubled, two tracks ran up
beside the train—three—four; came a succession of white-roofed houses, a
glimpse of a trolley-car with frosted windows, streets—more streets—the city.
She stood for a dazed moment in the frosty station before she saw
three fur-bundled figures descending upon her.
"There she is!"
"Oh, Sally Carrol!"
Sally Carrol dropped her bag.
"Hi!"
A faintly familiar icy-cold face kissed her, and then she was in a
group of faces all apparently emitting great clouds of heavy smoke; she was
shaking hands. There were Gordon, a short, eager man of thirty who looked like
an amateur knocked-about model for Harry, and his wife, Myra, a listless lady
with flaxen hair under a fur automobile cap. Almost immediately Sally Carrol
thought of her as vaguely Scandinavian. A cheerful chauffeur adopted her bag,
and amid ricochets of half-phrases, exclamations and perfunctory listless
"my dears" from Myra, they swept each other from the station.
Then they were in a sedan bound through a crooked succession of
snowy streets where dozens of little boys were hitching sleds behind grocery
wagons and automobiles.
"Oh," cried Sally Carrol, "I want to do that! Can
we Harry?"
"That's for kids. But we might——"
"It looks like such a circus!" she said regretfully.
Home was a rambling frame house set on a white lap of snow, and
there she met a big, gray-haired man of whom she approved, and a lady who was
like an egg, and who kissed her—these were Harry's parents. There was a
breathless indescribable hour crammed full of self-sentences, hot water, bacon
and eggs and confusion; and after that she was alone with Harry in the library,
asking him if she dared smoke.
It was a large room with a Madonna over the fireplace and rows
upon rows of books in covers of light gold and dark gold and shiny red. All the
chairs had little lace squares where one's head should rest, the couch was just
comfortable, the books looked as if they had been read—some—and Sally Carrol
had an instantaneous vision of the battered old library at home, with her
father's huge medical books, and the oil-paintings of her three great-uncles,
and the old couch that had been mended up for forty-five years and was still
luxurious to dream in. This room struck her as being neither attractive nor
particularly otherwise. It was simply a room with a lot of fairly expensive
things in it that all looked about fifteen years old.
"What do you think of it up here?" demanded Harry
eagerly. "Does it surprise you? Is it what you expected I mean?"
"You are, Harry," she said quietly, and reached out her
arms to him.
But after a brief kiss he seemed to extort enthusiasm from her.
"The town, I mean. Do you like it? Can you feel the pep in
the air?"
"Oh, Harry," she laughed, "you'll have to give me
time. You can't just fling questions at me."
She puffed at her cigarette with a sigh of contentment.
"One thing I want to ask you," he began rather
apologetically; "you Southerners put quite an emphasis on family, and all
that—not that it isn't quite all right, but you'll find it a little different
here. I mean—you'll notice a lot of things that'll seem to you sort of vulgar
display at first, Sally Carrol; but just remember that this is a
three-generation town. Everybody has a father, and about half of us have
grandfathers. Back of that we don't go."
"Of course," she murmured.
"Our grandfathers, you see, founded the place, and a lot of
them had to take some pretty queer jobs while they were doing the founding. For
instance there's one woman who at present is about the social model for the
town; well, her father was the first public ash man—things like that."
"Why," said Sally Carol, puzzled, "did you s'pose I
was goin' to make remarks about people?"
"Not at all," interrupted Harry, "and I'm not
apologizing for any one either. It's just that—well, a Southern girl came up
here last summer and said some unfortunate things, and—oh, I just thought I'd
tell you."
Sally Carrol felt suddenly indignant—as though she had been
unjustly spanked—but Harry evidently considered the subject closed, for he went
on with a great surge of enthusiasm.
"It's carnival time, you know. First in ten years. And
there's an ice palace they're building new that's the first they've had since
eighty-five. Built out of blocks of the clearest ice they could find—on a
tremendous scale."
She rose and walking to the window pushed aside the heavy Turkish
portières and looked out.
"Oh!" she cried suddenly. "There's two little boys
makin' a snow man! Harry, do you reckon I can go out an' help 'em?"
"You dream! Come here and kiss me."
She left the window rather reluctantly.
"I don't guess this is a very kissable climate, is it? I
mean, it makes you so you don't want to sit round, doesn't it?"
"We're not going to. I've got a vacation for the first week
you're here, and there's a dinner-dance to-night."
"Oh, Harry," she confessed, subsiding in a heap, half in
his lap, half in the pillows, "I sure do feel confused. I haven't got an
idea whether I'll like it or not, an' I don't know what people expect, or
anythin'. You'll have to tell me, honey."
"I'll tell you," he said softly, "if you'll just
tell me you're glad to be here."
"Glad—just awful glad!" she whispered, insinuating
herself into his arms in her own peculiar way. "Where you are is home for
me, Harry."
And as she said this she had the feeling for almost the first time
in her life that she was acting a part.
That night, amid the gleaming candles of a dinner-party, where the
men seemed to do most of the talking while the girls sat in a haughty and
expensive aloofness, even Harry's presence on her left failed to make her feel
at home.
"They're a good-looking crowd, don't you think?" he
demanded. "Just look round. There's Spud Hubbard, tackle at Princeton last
year, and Junie Morton—he and the red-haired fellow next to him were both Yale
hockey captains; Junie was in my class. Why, the best athletes in the world come
from these States round here. This is a man's country, I tell you. Look at John
J. Fishburn!"
"Who's he?" asked Sally Carrol innocently.
"Don't you know?"
"I've heard the name."
"Greatest wheat man in the Northwest, and one of the greatest
financiers in the country."
She turned suddenly to a voice on her right.
"I guess they forget to introduce us. My name's Roger
Patton."
"My name is Sally Carrol Happer," she said graciously.
"Yes, I know. Harry told me you were coming."
"You a relative?"
"No, I'm a professor."
"Oh," she laughed.
"At the university. You're from the South, aren't you?"
"Yes; Tarleton, Georgia."
She liked him immediately—a reddish-brown mustache under watery
blue eyes that had something in them that these other eyes lacked, some quality
of appreciation. They exchanged stray sentences through dinner, and she made up
her mind to see him again.
After coffee she was introduced to numerous good-looking young men
who danced with conscious precision and seemed to take it for granted that she
wanted to talk about nothing except Harry.
"Heavens," she thought, "They talk as if my being
engaged made me older than they are—as if I'd tell their mothers on them!"
In the South an engaged girl, even a young married woman, expected
the same amount of half-affectionate badinage and flattery that would be
accorded a débutante, but here all that seemed banned. One young man after
getting well started on the subject of Sally Carrol's eyes and, how they had
allured him ever since she entered the room, went into a violent convulsion
when he found she was visiting the Bellamys—was Harry's fiancée. He seemed to
feel as though he had made some risqué and inexcusable blunder, became
immediately formal and left her at the first opportunity.
She was rather glad when Roger Patton cut in on her and suggested
that they sit out a while.
"Well," he inquired, blinking cheerily, "how's
Carmen from the South?"
"Mighty fine. How's—how's Dangerous Dan McGrew? Sorry, but
he's the only Northerner I know much about."
He seemed to enjoy that.
"Of course," he confessed, "as a professor of
literature I'm not supposed to have read Dangerous Dan McGrew."
"Are you a native?"
"No, I'm a Philadelphian. Imported from Harvard to teach
French. But I've been here ten years."
"Nine years, three hundred an' sixty-four days longer than
me."
"Like it here?"
"Uh-huh. Sure do!"
"Really?"
"Well, why not? Don't I look as if I were havin' a good
time?"
"I saw you look out the window a minute ago—and shiver."
"Just my imagination," laughed Sally Carroll "I'm
used to havin' everythin' quiet outside an' sometimes I look out an' see a
flurry of snow an' it's just as if somethin' dead was movin'."
He nodded appreciatively.
"Ever been North before?"
"Spent two Julys in Asheville, North Carolina."
"Nice-looking crowd aren't they?" suggested Patton,
indicating the swirling floor.
Sally Carrol started. This had been Harry's remark.
"Sure are! They're—canine."
"What?"
She flushed.
"I'm sorry; that sounded worse than I meant it. You see I
always think of people as feline or canine, irrespective of sex."
"Which are you?"
"I'm feline. So are you. So are most Southern men an' most of
these girls here."
"What's Harry?"
"Harry's canine distinctly. All the men I've to-night seem to
be canine."
"What does canine imply? A certain conscious masculinity as
opposed to subtlety?"
"Reckon so. I never analyzed it—only I just look at people
an' say 'canine' or 'feline' right off. It's right absurd I guess."
"Not at all. I'm interested. I used to have a theory about
these people. I think they're freezing up."
"What?"
"Well, they're growing' like Swedes—Ibsenesque, you know.
Very gradually getting gloomy and melancholy. It's these long winters. Ever
read Ibsen?"
She shook her head.
"Well, you find in his characters a certain brooding
rigidity. They're righteous, narrow, and cheerless, without infinite
possibilities for great sorrow or joy."
"Without smiles or tears?"
"Exactly. That's my theory. You see there are thousands of
Swedes up here. They come, I imagine, because the climate is very much like
their own, and there's been a gradual mingling. There're probably not half a
dozen here to-night, but—we've had four Swedish governors. Am I boring
you?"
"I'm mighty interested."
"Your future sister-in-law is half Swedish. Personally I like
her, but my theory is that Swedes react rather badly on us as a whole.
Scandinavians, you know, have the largest suicide rate in the world."
"Why do you live here if it's so depressing?"
"Oh, it doesn't get me. I'm pretty well cloistered, and I
suppose books mean more than people to me anyway."
"But writers all speak about the South being tragic. You
know—Spanish señoritas, black hair and daggers an' haunting music."
He shook his head.
"No, the Northern races are the tragic races—they don't
indulge in the cheering luxury of tears."
Sally Carrol thought of her graveyard. She supposed that that was
vaguely what she had meant when she said it didn't depress her.
"The Italians are about the gayest people in the world—but
it's a dull subject," he broke off. "Anyway, I want to tell you
you're marrying a pretty fine man."
Sally Carrol was moved by an impulse of confidence.
"I know. I'm the sort of person who wants to be taken care of
after a certain point, and I feel sure I will be."
"Shall we dance? You know," he continued as they rose,
"it's encouraging to find a girl who knows what she's marrying for.
Nine-tenths of them think of it as a sort of walking into a moving-picture
sunset."
She laughed and liked him immensely.
Two hours later on the way home she nestled near Harry in the back
seat.
"Oh, Harry," she whispered "it's so co-old!"
"But it's warm in here, daring girl."
"But outside it's cold; and oh, that howling wind!"
She buried her face deep in his fur coat and trembled
involuntarily as his cold lips kissed the tip of her ear.
IV
The first week of her visit passed in a whirl. She had her
promised toboggan-ride at the back of an automobile through a chill January
twilight. Swathed in furs she put in a morning tobogganing on the country-club
hill; even tried skiing, to sail through the air for a glorious moment and then
land in a tangled laughing bundle on a soft snow-drift. She liked all the winter
sports, except an afternoon spent snow-shoeing over a glaring plain under pale
yellow sunshine, but she soon realized that these things were for children—that
she was being humored and that the enjoyment round her was only a reflection of
her own.
At first the Bellamy family puzzled her. The men were reliable and
she liked them; to Mr. Bellamy especially, with his iron-gray hair and
energetic dignity, she took an immediate fancy, once she found that he was born
in Kentucky; this made of him a link between the old life and the new. But
toward the women she felt a definite hostility. Myra, her future sister-in-law,
seemed the essence of spiritless conversationality. Her conversation was so
utterly devoid of personality that Sally Carrol, who came from a country where
a certain amount of charm and assurance could be taken for granted in the
women, was inclined to despise her.
"If those women aren't beautiful," she thought,
"they're nothing. They just fade out when you look at them. They're
glorified domestics. Men are the centre of every mixed group."
Lastly there was Mrs. Bellamy, whom Sally Carrol detested. The
first day's impression of an egg had been confirmed—an egg with a cracked,
veiny voice and such an ungracious dumpiness of carriage that Sally Carrol felt
that if she once fell she would surely scramble. In addition, Mrs. Bellamy
seemed to typify the town in being innately hostile to strangers. She called
Sally Carrol "Sally," and could not be persuaded that the double name
was anything more than a tedious ridiculous nickname. To Sally Carrol this
shortening of her name was presenting her to the public half clothed. She loved
"Sally Carrol"; she loathed "Sally." She knew also that
Harry's mother disapproved of her bobbed hair; and she had never dared smoke
down-stairs after that first day when Mrs. Bellamy had come into the library
sniffing violently.
Of all the men she met she preferred Roger Patton, who was a
frequent visitor at the house. He never again alluded to the Ibsenesque
tendency of the populace, but when he came in one day and found her curled upon
the sofa bent over "Peer Gynt" he laughed and told her to forget what
he'd said—that it was all rot.
They had been walking homeward between mounds of high-piled snow
and under a sun which Sally Carrol scarcely recognized. They passed a little
girl done up in gray wool until she resembled a small Teddy bear, and Sally
Carrol could not resist a gasp of maternal appreciation.
"Look! Harry!"
"What?"
"That little girl—did you see her face?"
"Yes, why?"
"It was red as a little strawberry. Oh, she was cute!"
"Why, your own face is almost as red as that already!
Everybody's healthy here. We're out in the cold as soon as we're old enough to
walk. Wonderful climate!"
She looked at him and had to agree. He was mighty healthy-looking;
so was his brother. And she had noticed the new red in her own cheeks that very
morning.
Suddenly their glances were caught and held, and they stared for a
moment at the street-corner ahead of them. A man was standing there, his knees
bent, his eyes gazing upward with a tense expression as though he were about to
make a leap toward the chilly sky. And then they both exploded into a shout of
laughter, for coming closer they discovered it had been a ludicrous momentary
illusion produced by the extreme bagginess of the man's trousers.
"Reckon that's one on us," she laughed.
"He must be Southerner, judging by those trousers,"
suggested Harry mischievously.
"Why, Harry!"
Her surprised look must have irritated him.
"Those damn Southerners!"
Sally Carrol's eyes flashed.
"Don't call 'em that."
"I'm sorry, dear," said Harry, malignantly apologetic,
"but you know what I think of them. They're sort of—sort of
degenerates—not at all like the old Southerners. They've lived so long down
there with all the colored people that they've gotten lazy and shiftless."
"Hush your mouth, Harry!" she cried angrily.
"They're not! They may be lazy—anybody would be in that climate—but
they're my best friends, an' I don't want to hear 'em criticised in any such sweepin'
way. Some of 'em are the finest men in the world."
"Oh, I know. They're all right when they come North to
college, but of all the hangdog, ill-dressed, slovenly lot I ever saw, a bunch
of small-town Southerners are the worst!"
Sally Carrol was clinching her gloved hands and biting her lip
furiously.
"Why," continued Harry, "if there was one in my
class at New Haven, and we all thought that at last we'd found the true type of
Southern aristocrat, but it turned out that he wasn't an aristocrat at all—just
the son of a Northern carpetbagger, who owned about all the cotton round
Mobile."
"A Southerner wouldn't talk the way you're talking now,"
she said evenly.
"They haven't the energy!"
"Or the somethin' else."
"I'm sorry Sally Carrol, but I've heard you say yourself that
you'd never marry——"
"That's quite different. I told you I wouldn't want to tie my
life to any of the boys that are round Tarleton now, but I never made any
sweepin' generalities."
They walked along in silence.
"I probably spread it on a bit thick Sally Carrol. I'm
sorry."
She nodded but made no answer. Five minutes later as they stood in
the hallway she suddenly threw her arms round him.
"Oh, Harry," she cried, her eyes brimming with tears;
"let's get married next week. I'm afraid of having fusses like that. I'm
afraid, Harry. It wouldn't be that way if we were married."
But Harry, being in the wrong, was still irritated.
"That'd be idiotic. We decided on March."
The tears in Sally Carrol's eyes faded; her expression hardened
slightly.
"Very well—I suppose I shouldn't have said that."
Harry melted.
"Dear little nut!" he cried. "Come and kiss me and
let's forget." That very night at the end of a vaudeville performance the
orchestra played "Dixie" and Sally Carrol felt something stronger and
more enduring than her tears and smiles of the day brim up inside her. She
leaned forward gripping the arms of her chair until her face grew crimson.
"Sort of get you dear?" whispered Harry.
But she did not hear him. To the limited throb of the violins and
the inspiring beat of the kettle-drums her own old ghosts were marching by and
on into the darkness, and as fifes whistled and sighed in the low encore they
seemed so nearly out of sight that she could have waved good-by.
"Away, Away,
Away down South in Dixie!
Away, away,
Away down South in Dixie!"
V
It was a particularly cold night. A sudden thaw had nearly cleared
the streets the day before, but now they were traversed again with a powdery
wraith of loose snow that travelled in wavy lines before the feet of the wind,
and filled the lower air with a fine-particled mist. There was no sky—only a
dark, ominous tent that draped in the tops of the streets and was in reality a
vast approaching army of snowflakes—while over it all, chilling away the
comfort from the brown-and-green glow of lighted windows and muffling the
steady trot of the horse pulling their sleigh, interminably washed the north
wind. It was a dismal town after all, she though, dismal.
Sometimes at night it had seemed to her as though no one lived
here—they had all gone long ago—leaving lighted houses to be covered in time by
tombing heaps of sleet. Oh, if there should be snow on her grave! To be beneath
great piles of it all winter long, where even her headstone would be a light
shadow against light shadows. Her grave—a grave that should be flower-strewn
and washed with sun and rain.
She thought again of those isolated country houses that her train
had passed, and of the life there the long winter through—the ceaseless glare
through the windows, the crust forming on the soft drifts of snow, finally the
slow cheerless melting and the harsh spring of which Roger Patton had told her.
Her spring—to lose it forever—with its lilacs and the lazy sweetness it stirred
in her heart. She was laying away that spring—afterward she would lay away that
sweetness.
With a gradual insistence the storm broke. Sally Carrol felt a
film of flakes melt quickly on her eyelashes, and Harry reached over a furry
arm and drew down her complicated flannel cap. Then the small flakes came in
skirmish-line, and the horse bent his neck patiently as a transparency of white
appeared momentarily on his coat.
"Oh, he's cold, Harry," she said quickly.
"Who? The horse? Oh, no, he isn't. He likes it!"
After another ten minutes they turned a corner and came in sight
of their destination. On a tall hill outlined in vivid glaring green against
the wintry sky stood the ice palace. It was three stories in the air, with
battlements and embrasures and narrow icicled windows, and the innumerable
electric lights inside made a gorgeous transparency of the great central hall.
Sally Carrol clutched Harry's hand under the fur robe.
"It's beautiful!" he cried excitedly. "My golly,
it's beautiful, isn't it! They haven't had one here since eighty-five!"
Somehow the notion of there not having been one since eighty-five
oppressed her. Ice was a ghost, and this mansion of it was surely peopled by
those shades of the eighties, with pale faces and blurred snow-filled hair.
"Come on, dear," said Harry.
She followed him out of the sleigh and waited while he hitched the
horse. A party of four—Gordon, Myra, Roger Patton, and another girl—drew up
beside them with a mighty jingle of bells. There were quite a crowd already,
bundled in fur or sheepskin, shouting and calling to each other as they moved
through the snow, which was now so thick that people could scarcely be
distinguished a few yards away.
"It's a hundred and seventy feet tall," Harry was saying
to a muffled figure beside him as they trudged toward the entrance;
"covers six thousand square yards."
She caught snatches of conversation: "One main
hall"—"walls twenty to forty inches thick"—"and the ice
cave has almost a mile of—"—"this Canuck who built it——"
They found their way inside, and dazed by the magic of the great
crystal walls Sally Carrol found herself repeating over and over two lines from
"Kubla Khan":
"It was a miracle of rare device,
A sunny pleasure-dome with caves of ice!"
In the great glittering cavern with the dark shut out she took a
seat on a wooded bench and the evening's oppression lifted. Harry was right—it
was beautiful; and her gaze travelled the smooth surface of the walls, the
blocks for which had been selected for their purity and dearness to obtain this
opalescent, translucent effect.
"Look! Here we go—oh, boy!" cried Harry.
A band in a far corner struck up "Hail, Hail, the Gang's All
Here!" which echoed over to them in wild muddled acoustics, and then the
lights suddenly went out; silence seemed to flow down the icy sides and sweep
over them. Sally Carrol could still see her white breath in the darkness, and a
dim row of pale faces over on the other side.
The music eased to a sighing complaint, and from outside drifted
in the full-throated remnant chant of the marching clubs. It grew louder like
some pæan of a viking tribe traversing an ancient wild; it swelled—they were
coming nearer; then a row of torches appeared, and another and another, and
keeping time with their moccasined feet a long column of gray-mackinawed
figures swept in, snow-shoes slung at their shoulders, torches soaring and
flickering as their voice rose along the great walls.
The gray column ended and another followed, the light streaming
luridly this time over red toboggan caps and flaming crimson mackinaws, and as
they entered they took up the refrain; then came a long platoon of blue and
white, of green, of white, of brown and yellow.
"Those white ones are the Wacouta Club," whispered Harry
eagerly. "Those are the men you've met round at dances."
The volume of the voices grew; the great cavern was a
phantasmagoria of torches waving in great banks of fire, of colors and the
rhythm of soft-leather steps. The leading column turned and halted, platoon
deploys in front of platoon until the whole procession made a solid flag of
flame, and then from thousands of voices burst a mighty shout that filled the
air like a crash of thunder, and sent the torches wavering. It was magnificent,
it was tremendous! To Sally Carol it was the North offering sacrifice on some
mighty altar to the gray pagan God of Snow. As the shout died the band struck
up again and there came more singing, and then long reverberating cheers by each
club. She sat very quiet listening while the staccato cries rent the stillness;
and then she started, for there was a volley of explosion, and great clouds of
smoke went up here and there through the cavern—the flash-light photographers
at work—and the council was over. With the band at their head the clubs formed
in column once more, took up their chant, and began to march out.
"Come on!" shouted Harry. "We want to see the
labyrinths down-stairs before they turn the lights off!"
They all rose and started toward the chute—Harry and Sally Carrol
in the lead, her little mitten buried in his big fur gantlet. At the bottom of
the chute was a long empty room of ice, with the ceiling so low that they had
to stoop—and their hands were parted. Before she realized what he intended
Harry had darted down one of the half-dozen glittering passages that opened
into the room and was only a vague receding blot against the green shimmer.
"Harry!" she called.
"Come on!" he cried back.
She looked round the empty chamber; the rest of the party had
evidently decided to go home, were already outside somewhere in the blundering
snow. She hesitated and then darted in after Harry.
"Harry!" she shouted.
She had reached a turning-point thirty feet down; she heard a
faint muffled answer far to the left, and with a touch of panic fled toward it.
She passed another turning, two more yawning alleys.
"Harry!"
No answer. She started to run straight forward, and then turned
like lightning and sped back the way she had come, enveloped in a sudden icy
terror.
She reached a turn—was it here?—took the left and came to what
should have been the outlet into the long, low room, but it was only another
glittering passage with darkness at the end. She called again, but the walls
gave back a flat, lifeless echo with no reverberations. Retracing her steps she
turned another corner, this time following a wide passage. It was like the
green lane between the parted water of the Red Sea, like a damp vault
connecting empty tombs.
She slipped a little now as she walked, for ice had formed on the
bottom of her overshoes; she had to run her gloves along the half-slippery,
half-sticky walls to keep her balance.
"Harry!"
Still no answer. The sound she made bounced mockingly down to the
end of the passage.
Then on an instant the lights went out, and she was in complete
darkness. She gave a small, frightened cry, and sank down into a cold little
heap on the ice. She felt her left knee do something as she fell, but she
scarcely noticed it as some deep terror far greater than any fear of being lost
settled upon her. She was alone with this presence that came out of the North,
the dreary loneliness that rose from ice-bound whalers in the Arctic seas, from
smokeless, trackless wastes where were strewn the whitened bones of adventure.
It was an icy breath of death; it was rolling down low across the land to
clutch at her.
With a furious, despairing energy she rose again and started
blindly down the darkness. She must get out. She might be lost in here for
days, freeze to death and lie embedded in the ice like corpses she had read of,
kept perfectly preserved until the melting of a glacier. Harry probably thought
she had left with the others—he had gone by now; no one would know until next
day. She reached pitifully for the wall. Forty inches thick, they had
said—forty inches thick!
On both sides of her along the walls she felt things creeping,
damp souls that haunted this palace, this town, this North.
"Oh, send somebody—send somebody!" she cried aloud.
Clark Darrow—he would understand; or Joe Ewing; she couldn't be
left here to wander forever—to be frozen, heart, body, and soul. This her—this
Sally Carrol! Why, she was a happy thing. She was a happy little girl. She
liked warmth and summer and Dixie. These things were foreign—foreign.
"You're not crying," something said aloud. "You'll
never cry any more. Your tears would just freeze; all tears freeze up
here!"
She sprawled full length on the ice.
"Oh, God!" she faltered.
A long single file of minutes went by, and with a great weariness
she felt her eyes dosing. Then some one seemed to sit down near her and take
her face in warm, soft hands. She looked up gratefully.
"Why it's Margery Lee," she crooned softly to herself.
"I knew you'd come." It really was Margery Lee, and she was just as
Sally Carrol had known she would be, with a young, white brow, and wide
welcoming eyes, and a hoop-skirt of some soft material that was quite
comforting to rest on.
"Margery Lee."
It was getting darker now and darker—all those tombstones ought to
be repainted sure enough, only that would spoil 'em, of course. Still, you
ought to be able to see 'em.
Then after a succession of moments that went fast and then slow,
but seemed to be ultimately resolving themselves into a multitude of blurred
rays converging toward a pale-yellow sun, she heard a great cracking noise
break her new-found stillness.
It was the sun, it was a light; a torch, and a torch beyond that,
and another one, and voices; a face took flesh below the torch, heavy arms
raised her and she felt something on her cheek—it felt wet. Some one had seized
her and was rubbing her face with snow. How ridiculous—with snow!
"Sally Carrol! Sally Carrol!"
It was Dangerous Dan McGrew; and two other faces she didn't know.
"Child, child! We've been looking for you two hours! Harry's
half-crazy!"
Things came rushing back into place—the singing, the torches, the
great shout of the marching clubs. She squirmed in Patton's arms and gave a
long low cry.
"Oh, I want to get out of here! I'm going back home. Take me
home"——her voice rose to a scream that sent a chill to Harry's heart as he
came racing down the next passage—"to-morrow!" she cried with
delirious, unstrained passion—"To-morrow! To-morrow! To-morrow!"
VI
The wealth of golden sunlight poured a quite enervating yet oddly
comforting heat over the house where day long it faced the dusty stretch of
road. Two birds were making a great to-do in a cool spot found among the
branches of a tree next door, and down the street a colored woman was
announcing herself melodiously as a purveyor of strawberries. It was April
afternoon.
Sally Carrol Happer, resting her chin on her arm, and her arm on
an old window-seat, gazed sleepily down over the spangled dust whence the heat
waves were rising for the first time this spring. She was watching a very
ancient Ford turn a perilous corner and rattle and groan to a jolting stop at
the end of the walk. See made no sound and in a minute a strident familiar
whistle rent the air. Sally Carrol smiled and blinked.
"Good mawnin'."
A head appeared tortuously from under the car-top below.
"Tain't mawnin', Sally Carrol."
"Sure enough!" she said in affected surprise. "I
guess maybe not."
"What you doin'?"
"Eatin' a green peach. 'Spect to die any minute."
Clark twisted himself a last impossible notch to get a view of her
face.
"Water's warm as a kettla steam, Sally Carol. Wanta go
swimmin'?"
"Hate to move," sighed Sally Carol lazily, "but I
reckon so."
In 1915 Horace Tarbox
was thirteen years old. In that year he took the examinations for entrance to
Princeton University and received the Grade A—excellent—in Cæsar, Cicero,
Vergil, Xenophon, Homer, Algebra, Plane Geometry, Solid Geometry, and
Chemistry.
Two years later while George M. Cohan was composing "Over
There," Horace was leading the sophomore class by several lengths and
digging out theses on "The Syllogism as an Obsolete Scholastic Form,"
and during the battle of Château-Thierry he was sitting at his desk deciding
whether or not to wait until his seventeenth birthday before beginning his
series of essays on "The Pragmatic Bias of the New Realists."
After a while some newsboy told him that the war was over, and he
was glad, because it meant that Peat Brothers, publishers, would get out their
new edition of "Spinoza's Improvement of the Understanding." Wars
were all very well in their way, made young men self-reliant or something but
Horace felt that he could never forgive the President for allowing a brass band
to play under his window the night of the false armistice, causing him to leave
three important sentences out of his thesis on "German Idealism."
The next year he went up to Yale to take his degree as Master of
Arts.
He was seventeen then, tall and slender, with near-sighted gray
eyes and an air of keeping himself utterly detached from the mere words he let
drop.
"I never feel as though I'm talking to him,"
expostulated Professor Dillinger to a sympathetic colleague. "He makes me
feel as though I were talking to his representative. I always expect him to
say: 'Well, I'll ask myself and find out.'"
And then, just as nonchalantly as though Horace Tarbox had been
Mr. Beef the butcher or Mr. Hat the haberdasher, life reached in, seized him,
handled him, stretched him, and unrolled him like a piece of Irish lace on a
Saturday-afternoon bargain-counter.
To move in the literary fashion I should say that this was all
because when way back in colonial days the hardy pioneers had come to a bald
place in Connecticut and asked of each other, "Now, what shall we build
here?" the hardiest one among 'em had answered: "Let's build a town
where theatrical managers can try out musical comedies!" How afterward
they founded Yale College there, to try the musical comedies on, is a story
every one knows. At any rate one December, "Home James" opened at the
Shubert, and all the students encored Marcia Meadow, who sang a song about the
Blundering Blimp in the first act and did a shaky, shivery, celebrated dance in
the last.
Marcia was nineteen. She didn't have wings, but audiences agreed
generally that she didn't need them. She was a blonde by natural pigment, and
she wore no paint on the streets at high noon. Outside of that she was no
better than most women.
It was Charlie Moon who promised her five thousand Pall Malls if
she would pay a call on Horace Tarbox, prodigy extraordinary. Charlie was a
senior in Sheffield, and he and Horace were first cousins. They liked and
pitied each other.
Horace had been particularly busy that night. The failure of the
Frenchman Laurier to appreciate the significance of the new realists was
preying on his mind. In fact, his only reaction to a low, clear-cut rap at his
study was to make him speculate as to whether any rap would have actual existence
without an ear there to hear it. He fancied he was verging more and more toward
pragmatism. But at that moment, though he did not know it, he was verging with
astounding rapidity toward something quite different.
The rap sounded—three seconds leaked by—the rap sounded.
"Come in," muttered Horace automatically.
He heard the door open and then close, but, bent over his book in
the big armchair before the fire, he did not look up.
"Leave it on the bed in the other room," he said
absently.
"Leave what on the bed in the other room?"
Marcia Meadow had to talk her songs, but her speaking voice was
like byplay on a harp.
"The laundry."
"I can't."
Horace stirred impatiently in his chair.
"Why can't you?"
"Why, because I haven't got it."
"Hm!" he replied testily. "Suppose you go back and
get it."
Across the fire from Horace was another easychair. He was
accustomed to change to it in the course of an evening by way of exercise and
variety. One chair he called Berkeley, the other he called Hume. He suddenly
heard a sound as of a rustling, diaphanous form sinking into Hume. He glanced
up.
"Well," said Marcia with the sweet smile she used in Act
Two ("Oh, so the Duke liked my dancing!") "Well, Omar Khayyam,
here I am beside you singing in the wilderness."
Horace stared at her dazedly. The momentary suspicion came to him
that she existed there only as a phantom of his imagination. Women didn't come
into men's rooms and sink into men's Humes. Women brought laundry and took your
seat in the street-car and married you later on when you were old enough to
know fetters.
This woman had clearly materialized out of Hume. The very froth of
her brown gauzy dress was art emanation from Hume's leather arm there! If he
looked long enough he would see Hume right through her and then he would be
alone again in the room. He passed his fist across his eyes. He really must
take up those trapeze exercises again.
"For Pete's sake, don't look so critical!" objected the
emanation pleasantly. "I feel as if you were going to wish me away with
that patent dome of yours. And then there wouldn't be anything left of me
except my shadow in your eyes."
Horace coughed. Coughing was one of his two gestures. When he
talked you forgot he had a body at all. It was like hearing a phonograph record
by a singer who had been dead a long time.
"What do you want?" he asked.
"I want them letters," whined Marcia
melodramatically—"them letters of mine you bought from my grandsire in
1881."
Horace considered.
"I haven't got your letters," he said evenly. "I am
only seventeen years old. My father was not born until March 3, 1879. You
evidently have me confused with some one else."
"You're only seventeen?" repeated March suspiciously.
"Only seventeen."
"I knew a girl," said Marcia reminiscently, "who
went on the ten-twenty-thirty when she was sixteen. She was so stuck on herself
that she could never say 'sixteen' without putting the 'only' before it. We got
to calling her 'Only Jessie.' And she's just where she was when she
started—only worse. 'Only' is a bad habit, Omar—it sounds like an alibi."
"My name is not Omar."
"I know," agreed Marcia, nodding—"your name's
Horace. I just call you Omar because you remind me of a smoked cigarette."
"And I haven't your letters. I doubt if I've ever met your
grandfather. In fact, I think it very improbable that you yourself were alive
in 1881."
Marcia stared at him in wonder.
"Me—1881? Why sure! I was second-line stuff when the
Florodora Sextette was still in the convent. I was the original nurse to Mrs.
Sol Smith's Juliette. Why, Omar, I was a canteen singer during the War of 1812."
Horace's mind made a sudden successful leap, and he grinned.
"Did Charlie Moon put you up to this?"
Marcia regarded him inscrutably.
"Who's Charlie Moon?"
"Small—wide nostrils—big ears."
She grew several inches and sniffed.
"I'm not in the habit of noticing my friends' nostrils.
"Then it was Charlie?"
Marcia bit her lip—and then yawned. "Oh, let's change the
subject, Omar. I'll pull a snore in this chair in a minute."
"Yes," replied Horace gravely, "Hume has often been
considered soporific——"
"Who's your friend—and will he die?"
Then of a sudden Horace Tarbox rose slenderly and began to pace
the room with his hands in his pockets. This was his other gesture.
"I don't care for this," he said as if he were talking
to himself—"at all. Not that I mind your being here—I don't. You're quite
a pretty little thing, but I don't like Charlie Moon's sending you up here. Am
I a laboratory experiment on which the janitors as well as the chemists can
make experiments? Is my intellectual development humorous in any way? Do I look
like the pictures of the little Boston boy in the comic magazines? Has that
callow ass, Moon, with his eternal tales about his week in Paris, any right
to——"
"No," interrupted Marcia emphatically. "And you're
a sweet boy. Come here and kiss me."
Horace stopped quickly in front of her.
"Why do you want me to kiss you?" he asked intently,
"Do you just go round kissing people?"
"Why, yes," admitted Marcia, unruffled. "'At's all
life is. Just going round kissing people."
"Well," replied Horace emphatically, "I must say
your ideas are horribly garbled! In the first place life isn't just that, and
in the second place. I won't kiss you. It might get to be a habit and I can't
get rid of habits. This year I've got in the habit of lolling in bed until
seven-thirty——"
Marcia nodded understandingly.
"Do you ever have any fun?" she asked.
"What do you mean by fun?"
"See here," said Marcia sternly, "I like you, Omar,
but I wish you'd talk as if you had a line on what you were saying. You sound
as if you were gargling a lot of words in your mouth and lost a bet every time
you spilled a few. I asked you if you ever had any fun."
Horace shook his head.
"Later, perhaps," he answered. "You see I'm a plan.
I'm an experiment. I don't say that I don't get tired of it sometimes—I do.
Yet—oh, I can't explain! But what you and Charlie Moon call fun wouldn't be fun
to me."
"Please explain."
Horace stared at her, started to speak and then, changing his
mind, resumed his walk. After an unsuccessful attempt to determine whether or
not he was looking at her Marcia smiled at him.
"Please explain."
Horace turned.
"If I do, will you promise to tell Charlie Moon that I wasn't
in?"
"Uh-uh."
"Very well, then. Here's my history: I was a 'why' child. I
wanted to see the wheels go round. My father was a young economics professor at
Princeton. He brought me up on the system of answering every question I asked
him to the best of his ability. My response to that gave him the idea of making
an experiment in precocity. To aid in the massacre I had ear trouble—seven
operations between the age of nine and twelve. Of course this kept me apart
from other boys and made me ripe for forcing. Anyway, while my generation was
laboring through Uncle Remus I was honestly enjoying Catullus in the original.
"I passed off my college examinations when I was thirteen
because I couldn't help it. My chief associates were professors, and I took a
tremendous pride in knowing that I had a fine intelligence, for though I was
unusually gifted I was not abnormal in other ways. When I was sixteen I got
tired of being a freak; I decided that some one had made a bad mistake. Still
as I'd gone that far I concluded to finish it up by taking my degree of Master
of Arts. My chief interest in life is the study of modern philosophy. I am a
realist of the School of Anton Laurier—with Bergsonian trimmings—and I'll be
eighteen years old in two months. That's all."
"Whew!" exclaimed Marcia. "That's enough! You do a
neat job with the parts of speech."
"Satisfied?"
"No, you haven't kissed me."
"It's not in my programme," demurred Horace.
"Understand that I don't pretend to be above physical things. They have
their place, but——"
"Oh, don't be so darned reasonable!"
"I can't help it."
"I hate these slot-machine people."
"I assure you I——" began Horace.
"Oh shut up!"
"My own rationality——"
"I didn't say anything about your nationality. You're
Amuricun, ar'n't you?"
"Yes."
"Well, that's O.K. with me. I got a notion I want to see you
do something that isn't in your highbrow programme. I want to see if a
what-ch-call-em with Brazilian trimmings—that thing you said you were—can be a
little human."
Horace shook his head again.
"I won't kiss you."
"My life is blighted," muttered Marcia tragically.
"I'm a beaten woman. I'll go through life without ever having a kiss with
Brazilian trimmings." She sighed. "Anyways, Omar, will you come and
see my show?"
"What show?"
"I'm a wicked actress from 'Home James'!"
"Light opera?"
"Yes—at a stretch. One of the characters is a Brazilian
rice-planter. That might interest you."
"I saw 'The Bohemian Girl' once," reflected Horace
aloud. "I enjoyed it—to some extent——"
"Then you'll come?"
"Well, I'm—I'm——"
"Oh, I know—you've got to run down to Brazil for the
week-end."
"Not at all. I'd be delighted to come——"
Marcia clapped her hands.
"Goodyforyou! I'll mail you a ticket—Thursday night?"
"Why, I——"
"Good! Thursday night it is."
She stood up and walking close to him laid both hands on his
shoulders.
"I like you, Omar. I'm sorry I tried to kid you. I thought
you'd be sort of frozen, but you're a nice boy."
He eyed her sardonically.
"I'm several thousand generations older than you are."
"You carry your age well."
They shook hands gravely.
"My name's Marcia Meadow," she said emphatically.
"'Member it— Marcia Meadow. And I won't tell Charlie Moon you were
in."
An instant later as she was skimming down the last flight of
stairs three at a time she heard a voice call over the upper banister:
"Oh, say——"
She stopped and looked up—made out a vague form leaning over.
"Oh, say!" called the prodigy again. "Can you hear
me?"
"Here's your connection Omar."
"I hope I haven't given you the impression that I consider
kissing intrinsically irrational."
"Impression? Why, you didn't even give me the kiss! Never
fret—so long."
Two doors near her opened curiously at the sound of a feminine
voice. A tentative cough sounded from above. Gathering her skirts, Marcia dived
wildly down the last flight, and was swallowed up in the murky Connecticut air
outside.
Up-stairs Horace paced the floor of his study. From time to time
he glanced toward Berkeley waiting there in suave dark-red reputability, an
open book lying suggestively on his cushions. And then he found that his
circuit of the floor was bringing him each time nearer to Hume. There was
something about Hume that was strangely and inexpressibly different. The
diaphanous form still seemed hovering near, and had Horace sat there he would
have felt as if he were sitting on a lady's lap. And though Horace couldn't
have named the quality of difference, there was such a quality—quite intangible
to the speculative mind, but real, nevertheless. Hume was radiating something
that in all the two hundred years of his influence he had never radiated
before.
Hume was radiating attar of roses.
II
On Thursday night Horace Tarbox sat in an aisle seat in the fifth
row and witnessed "Home James." Oddly enough he found that he was
enjoying himself. The cynical students near him were annoyed at his audible
appreciation of time-honored jokes in the Hammerstein tradition. But Horace was
waiting with anxiety for Marcia Meadow singing her song about a Jazz-bound
Blundering Blimp. When she did appear, radiant under a floppity flower-faced
hat, a warm glow settled over him, and when the song was over he did not join
in the storm of applause. He felt somewhat numb.
In the intermission after the second act an usher materialized
beside him, demanded to know if he were Mr. Tarbox, and then handed him a note
written in a round adolescent band. Horace read it in some confusion, while the
usher lingered with withering patience in the aisle.
"Dear Omar: After the show I always grow an awful hunger. If
you want to satisfy it for me in the Taft Grill just communicate your answer to
the big-timber guide that brought this and oblige.
Your friend,
Marcia Meadow."
"Tell her,"—he coughed—"tell her that it will be
quite all right. I'll meet her in front of the theatre."
The big-timber guide smiled arrogantly.
"I giss she meant for you to come roun' t' the stage
door."
"Where—where is it?"
"Ou'side. Tunayulef. Down ee alley."
"What?"
"Ou'side. Turn to y' left! Down ee alley!"
The arrogant person withdrew. A freshman behind Horace snickered.
Then half an hour later, sitting in the Taft Grill opposite the
hair that was yellow by natural pigment, the prodigy was saying an odd thing.
"Do you have to do that dance in the last act?" he was
asking earnestly—"I mean, would they dismiss you if you refused to do
it?"
Marcia grinned.
"It's fun to do it. I like to do it."
And then Horace came out with a faux pas.
"I should think you'd detest it," he remarked
succinctly. "The people behind me were making remarks about your
bosom."
Marcia blushed fiery red.
"I can't help that," she said quickly. "The dance
to me is only a sort of acrobatic stunt. Lord, it's hard enough to do! I rub
liniment into my shoulders for an hour every night."
"Do you have—fun while you're on the stage?"
"Uh-huh—sure! I got in the habit of having people look at me,
Omar, and I like it."
"Hm!" Horace sank into a brownish study.
"How's the Brazilian trimmings?"
"Hm!" repeated Horace, and then after a pause:
"Where does the play go from here?"
"New York."
"For how long?"
"All depends. Winter—maybe."
"Oh!"
"Coming up to lay eyes on me, Omar, or aren't you int'rested?
Not as nice here, is it, as it was up in your room? I wish we was there
now."
"I feel idiotic in this place," confessed Horace,
looking round him nervously.
"Too bad! We got along pretty well."
At this he looked suddenly so melancholy that she changed her
tone, and reaching over patted his hand.
"Ever take an actress out to supper before?"
"No," said Horace miserably, "and I never will
again. I don't know why I came to-night. Here under all these lights and with
all these people laughing and chattering I feel completely out of my sphere. I
don't know what to talk to you about."
"We'll talk about me. We talked about you last time."
"Very well."
"Well, my name really is Meadow, but my first name isn't
Marcia— it's Veronica. I'm nineteen. Question—how did the girl make her leap to
the footlights? Answer—she was born in Passaic, New Jersey, and up to a year
ago she got the right to breathe by pushing Nabiscoes in Marcel's tea-room in
Trenton. She started going with a guy named Robbins, a singer in the Trent
House cabaret, and he got her to try a song and dance with him one evening. In
a month we were filling the supper-room every night. Then we went to New York
with meet-my-friend letters thick as a pile of napkins.
"In two days we landed a job at Divinerries', and I learned
to shimmy from a kid at the Palais Royal. We stayed at Divinerries' six months
until one night Peter Boyce Wendell, the columnist, ate his milk-toast there.
Next morning a poem about Marvellous Marcia came out in his newspaper, and
within two days I had three vaudeville offers and a chance at the Midnight
Frolic. I wrote Wendell a thank-you letter, and he printed it in his
column—said that the style was like Carlyle's, only more rugged and that I
ought to quit dancing and do North American literature. This got me a coupla
more vaudeville offers and a chance as an ingénue in a regular show. I took
it—and here I am, Omar."
When she finished they sat for a moment in silence she draping the
last skeins of a Welsh rabbit on her fork and waiting for him to speak.
"Let's get out of here," he said suddenly.
Marcia's eyes hardened.
"What's the idea? Am I making you sick?"
"No, but I don't like it here. I don't like to be sitting
here with you."
Without another word Marcia signalled for the waiter.
"What's the check?" she demanded briskly "My
part—the rabbit and the ginger ale."
Horace watched blankly as the waiter figured it.
"See here," he began, "I intended to pay for yours
too. You're my guest."
With a half-sigh Marcia rose from the table and walked from the
room. Horace, his face a document in bewilderment, laid a bill down and
followed her out, up the stairs and into the lobby. He overtook her in front of
the elevator and they faced each other.
"See here," he repeated "You're my guest. Have I
said something to offend you?"
After an instant of wonder Marcia's eyes softened.
"You're a rude fella!" she said slowly. "Don't you
know you're rude?"
"I can't help it," said Horace with a directness she
found quite disarming. "You know I like you."
"You said you didn't like being with me."
"I didn't like it."
"Why not?" Fire blazed suddenly from the gray forests of
his eyes.
"Because I didn't. I've formed the habit of liking you. I've
been thinking of nothing much else for two days."
"Well, if you——"
"Wait a minute," he interrupted. "I've got
something to say. It's this: in six weeks I'll be eighteen years old. When I'm
eighteen years old I'm coming up to New York to see you. Is there some place in
New York where we can go and not have a lot of people in the room?"
"Sure!" smiled Marcia. "You can come up to my
'partment. Sleep on the couch if you want to."
"I can't sleep on couches," he said shortly. "But I
want to talk to you."
"Why, sure," repeated Marcia, "in my
'partment."
In his excitement Horace put his hands in his pockets.
"All right—just so I can see you alone. I want to talk to you
as we talked up in my room."
"Honey boy," cried Marcia, laughing, "is it that
you want to kiss me?"
"Yes," Horace almost shouted. "I'll kiss you if you
want me to."
The elevator man was looking at them reproachfully. Marcia edged
toward the grated door.
"I'll drop you a post-card," she said.
Horace's eyes were quite wild.
"Send me a post-card! I'll come up any time after January
first. I'll be eighteen then."
And as she stepped into the elevator he coughed enigmatically, yet
with a vague challenge, at the calling, and walked quickly away.
III
He was there again. She saw him when she took her first glance at
the restless Manhattan audience—down in the front row with his head bent a bit
forward and his gray eyes fixed on her. And she knew that to him they were
alone together in a world where the high-rouged row of ballet faces and the
massed whines of the violins were as imperceivable as powder on a marble Venus.
An instinctive defiance rose within her.
"Silly boy!" she said to herself hurriedly, and she
didn't take her encore.
"What do they expect for a hundred a week—perpetual
motion?" she grumbled to herself in the wings.
"What's the trouble? Marcia?"
"Guy I don't like down in front."
During the last act as she waited for her specialty she had an odd
attack of stage fright. She had never sent Horace the promised post-card. Last
night she had pretended not to see him— had hurried from the theatre
immediately after her dance to pass a sleepless night in her apartment,
thinking—as she had so often in the last month—of his pale, rather intent face,
his slim, boyish fore, the merciless, unworldly abstraction that made him
charming to her.
And now that he had come she felt vaguely sorry—as though an
unwonted responsibility was being forced on her.
"Infant prodigy!" she said aloud.
"What?" demanded the negro comedian standing beside her.
"Nothing—just talking about myself."
On the stage she felt better. This was her dance—and she always
felt that the way she did it wasn't suggestive any more than to some men every
pretty girl is suggestive. She made it a stunt.
"Uptown, downtown, jelly on a spoon,
After sundown shiver by the moon."
He was not watching her now. She saw that clearly. He was looking
very deliberately at a castle on the back drop, wearing that expression he had
worn in the Taft Grill. A wave of exasperation swept over her—he was
criticising her.
"That's the vibration that thrills me,
Funny how affection fi-lls me
Uptown, downtown——"
Unconquerable revulsion seized her. She was suddenly and horribly
conscious of her audience as she had never been since her first appearance. Was
that a leer on a pallid face in the front row, a droop of disgust on one young
girl's mouth? These shoulders of hers—these shoulders shaking—were they hers?
Were they real? Surely shoulders weren't made for this!
"Then—you'll see at a glance
I'll need some funeral ushers with St. Vitus dance
At the end of the world I'll——"
The bassoon and two cellos crashed into a final chord. She paused
and poised a moment on her toes with every muscle tense, her young face looking
out dully at the audience in what one young girl afterward called "such a
curious, puzzled look," and then without bowing rushed from the stage.
Into the dressing-room she sped, kicked out of one dress and into another, and
caught a taxi outside.
Her apartment was very warm—small, it was, with a row of
professional pictures and sets of Kipling and O. Henry which she had bought
once from a blue-eyed agent and read occasionally. And there were several
chairs which matched, but were none of them comfortable, and a pink-shaded lamp
with blackbirds painted on it and an atmosphere of other stifled pink
throughout. There were nice things in it—nice things unrelentingly hostile to
each other, offspring of a vicarious, impatient taste acting in stray moments.
The worst was typified by a great picture framed in oak bark of Passaic as seen
from the Erie Railroad—altogether a frantic, oddly extravagant, oddly penurious
attempt to make a cheerful room. Marcia knew it was a failure.
Into this room came the prodigy and took her two hands awkwardly.
"I followed you this time," he said.
"Oh!"
"I want you to marry me," he said.
Her arms went out to him. She kissed his mouth with a sort of
passionate wholesomeness.
"There!"
"I love you," he said.
She kissed him again and then with a little sigh flung herself
into an armchair and half lay there, shaken with absurd laughter.
"Why, you infant prodigy!" she cried.
"Very well, call me that if you want to. I once told you that
I was ten thousand years older than you—I am."
She laughed again.
"I don't like to be disapproved of."
"No one's ever going to disapprove of you again."
"Omar," she asked, "why do you want to marry
me?"
The prodigy rose and put his hands in his pockets.
"Because I love you, Marcia Meadow."
And then she stopped calling him Omar.
"Dear boy," she said, "you know I sort of love you.
There's something about you—I can't tell what—that just puts my heart through
the wringer every time I'm round you. But honey—" She paused.
"But what?"
"But lots of things. But you're only just eighteen, and I'm
nearly twenty."
"Nonsense!" he interrupted. "Put it this way—that
I'm in my nineteenth year and you're nineteen. That makes us pretty
close—without counting that other ten thousand years I mentioned."
Marcia laughed.
"But there are some more 'buts.' Your people——
"My people!" exclaimed the prodigy ferociously. "My
people tried to make a monstrosity out of me." His face grew quite crimson
at the enormity of what he was going to say. "My people can go way back
and sit down!"
"My heavens!" cried Marcia in alarm. "All that? On
tacks, I suppose."
"Tacks—yes," he agreed wildly—"on anything. The
more I think of how they allowed me to become a little dried-up mummy——"
"What makes you thank you're that?" asked Marcia
quietly—"me?"
"Yes. Every person I've met on the streets since I met you
has made me jealous because they knew what love was before I did. I used to
call it the 'sex impulse.' Heavens!"
"There's more 'buts,'" said Marcia
"What are they?"
"How could we live?"
"I'll make a living."
"You're in college."
"Do you think I care anything about taking a Master of Arts
degree?"
"You want to be Master of Me, hey?"
"Yes! What? I mean, no!"
Marcia laughed, and crossing swiftly over sat in his lap. He put
his arm round her wildly and implanted the vestige of a kiss somewhere near her
neck.
"There's something white about you," mused Marcia
"but it doesn't sound very logical."
"Oh, don't be so darned reasonable!"
"I can't help it," said Marcia.
"I hate these slot-machine people!"
"But we——"
"Oh, shut up!"
And as Marcia couldn't talk through her ears she had to.
IV
Horace and Marcia were married early in February. The sensation in
academic circles both at Yale and Princeton was tremendous. Horace Tarbox, who
at fourteen had been played up in the Sunday magazines sections of metropolitan
newspapers, was throwing over his career, his chance of being a world authority
on American philosophy, by marrying a chorus girl—they made Marcia a chorus
girl. But like all modern stories it was a four-and-a-half-day wonder.
They took a flat in Harlem. After two weeks' search, during which
his idea of the value of academic knowledge faded unmercifully, Horace took a
position as clerk with a South American export company—some one had told him
that exporting was the coming thing. Marcia was to stay in her show for a few
months—anyway until he got on his feet. He was getting a hundred and
twenty-five to start with, and though of course they told him it was only a
question of months until he would be earning double that, Marcia refused even
to consider giving up the hundred and fifty a week that she was getting at the
time.
"We'll call ourselves Head and Shoulders, dear," she
said softly, "and the shoulders'll have to keep shaking a little longer
until the old head gets started."
"I hate it," he objected gloomily.
"Well," she replied emphatically, "Your salary wouldn't
keep us in a tenement. Don't think I want to be public—I don't. I want to be
yours. But I'd be a half-wit to sit in one room and count the sunflowers on the
wall-paper while I waited for you. When you pull down three hundred a month
I'll quit."
And much as it hurt his pride, Horace had to admit that hers was
the wiser course.
March mellowed into April. May read a gorgeous riot act to the
parks and waters of Manhatten, and they were very happy. Horace, who had no
habits whatsoever—he had never had time to form any—proved the most adaptable
of husbands, and as Marcia entirely lacked opinions on the subjects that
engrossed him there were very few jottings and bumping. Their minds moved in
different spheres. Marcia acted as practical factotum, and Horace lived either
in his old world of abstract ideas or in a sort of triumphantly earthy worship
and adoration of his wife. She was a continual source of astonishment to
him—the freshness and originality of her mind, her dynamic, clear-headed
energy, and her unfailing good humor.
And Marcia's co-workers in the nine-o'clock show, whither she had
transferred her talents, were impressed with her tremendous pride in her
husband's mental powers. Horace they knew only as a very slim, tight-lipped,
and immature-looking young man, who waited every night to take her home.
"Horace," said Marcia one evening when she met him as
usual at eleven, "you looked like a ghost standing there against the
street lights. You losing weight?"
He shook his head vaguely.
"I don't know. They raised me to a hundred and thirty-five
dollars to-day, and——"
"I don't care," said Marcia severely. "You're
killing yourself working at night. You read those big books on economy——"
"Economics," corrected Horace.
"Well, you read 'em every night long after I'm asleep. And
you're getting all stooped over like you were before we were married."
"But, Marcia, I've got to——"
"No, you haven't dear. I guess I'm running this shop for the
present, and I won't let my fella ruin his health and eyes. You got to get some
exercise."
"I do. Every morning I——"
"Oh, I know! But those dumb-bells of yours wouldn't give a
consumptive two degrees of fever. I mean real exercise. You've got to join a
gymnasium. 'Member you told me you were such a trick gymnast once that they
tried to get you out for the team in college and they couldn't because you had
a standing date with Herb Spencer?"
"I used to enjoy it," mused Horace, "but it would
take up too much time now."
"All right," said Marcia. "I'll make a bargain with
you. You join a gym and I'll read one of those books from the brown row of
'em."
"'Pepys' Diary'? Why, that ought to be enjoyable. He's very
light."
"Not for me—he isn't. It'll be like digesting plate glass.
But you been telling me how much it'd broaden my lookout. Well, you go to a gym
three nights a week and I'll take one big dose of Sammy."
Horace hesitated.
"Well——"
"Come on, now! You do some giant swings for me and I'll chase
some culture for you."
So Horace finally consented, and all through a baking summer he
spent three and sometimes four evenings a week experimenting on the trapeze in
Skipper's Gymnasium. And in August he admitted to Marcia that it made him
capable of more mental work during the day.
"Mens sana in corpore sano," he said.
"Don't believe in it," replied Marcia. "I tried one
of those patent medicines once and they're all bunk. You stick to
gymnastics."
One night in early September while he was going through one of his
contortions on the rings in the nearly deserted room he was addressed by a
meditative fat man whom he had noticed watching him for several nights.
"Say, lad, do that stunt you were doin' last night."
Horace grinned at him from his perch.
"I invented it," he said. "I got the idea from the
fourth proposition of Euclid."
"What circus he with?"
"He's dead."
"Well, he must of broke his neck doin' that stunt. I set here
last night thinkin' sure you was goin' to break yours."
"Like this!" said Horace, and swinging onto the trapeze
he did his stunt.
"Don't it kill your neck an' shoulder muscles?"
"It did at first, but inside of a week I wrote the Quod
erat demonstrandum on it."
"Hm!"
Horace swung idly on the trapeze.
"Ever think of takin' it up professionally?" asked the
fat man.
"Not I."
"Good money in it if you're willin' to do stunts like 'at an'
can get away with it."
"Here's another," chirped Horace eagerly, and the fat
man's mouth dropped suddenly agape as he watched this pink-jerseyed Prometheus
again defy the gods and Isaac Newton.
The night following this encounter Horace got home from work to
find a rather pale Marcia stretched out on the sofa waiting for him.
"I fainted twice to-day," she began without
preliminaries.
"What?"
"Yep. You see baby's due in four months now. Doctor says I
ought to have quit dancing two weeks ago."
Horace sat down and thought it over.
"I'm glad of course," he said pensively—"I mean
glad that we're going to have a baby. But this means a lot of expense."
"I've got two hundred and fifty in the bank," said Marcia
hopefully, "and two weeks' pay coming."
Horace computed quickly.
"Inducing my salary, that'll give us nearly fourteen hundred
for the next six months."
Marcia looked blue.
"That all? Course I can get a job singing somewhere this
month. And I can go to work again in March."
"Of course nothing!" said Horace gruffly. "You'll
stay right here. Let's see now—there'll be doctor's bills and a nurse, besides
the maid: We've got to have some more money."
"Well," said Marcia wearily, "I don't know where
it's coming from. It's up to the old head now. Shoulders is out of
business."
Horace rose and pulled on his coat.
"Where are you going?"
"I've got an idea," he answered. "I'll be right
back."
Ten minutes later as he headed down the street toward Skipper's
Gymnasium he felt a placid wonder, quite unmixed with humor, at what he was
going to do. How he would have gaped at himself a year before! How every one
would have gaped! But when you opened your door at the rap of life you let in
many things.
The gymnasium was brightly lit, and when his eyes became
accustomed to the glare he found the meditative fat man seated on a pile of
canvas mats smoking a big cigar.
"Say," began Horace directly, "were you in earnest
last night when you said I could make money on my trapeze stunts?"
"Why, yes," said the fat man in surprise.
"Well, I've been thinking it over, and I believe I'd like to
try it. I could work at night and on Saturday afternoons—and regularly if the
pay is high enough."
The fat men looked at his watch.
"Well," he said, "Charlie Paulson's the man to see.
He'll book you inside of four days, once he sees you work out. He won't be in
now, but I'll get hold of him for to-morrow night."
The fat man was as good as his word. Charlie Paulson arrived next
night and put in a wondrous hour watching the prodigy swap through the air in
amazing parabolas, and on the night following he brought two age men with him
who looked as though they had been born smoking black cigars and talking about
money in low, passionate voices. Then on the succeeding Saturday Horace
Tarbox's torso made its first professional appearance in a gymnastic exhibition
at the Coleman Street Gardens. But though the audience numbered nearly five
thousand people, Horace felt no nervousness. From his childhood he had read
papers to audiences—learned that trick of detaching himself.
"Marcia," he said cheerfully later that same night,
"I think we're out of the woods. Paulson thinks he can get me an opening
at the Hippodrome, and that means an all-winter engagement. The Hippodrome you
know, is a big——"
"Yes, I believe I've heard of it," interrupted Marcia,
"but I want to know about this stunt you're doing. It isn't any
spectacular suicide, is it?"
"It's nothing," said Horace quietly. "But if you
can think of an nicer way of a man killing himself than taking a risk for you,
why that's the way I want to die."
Marcia reached up and wound both arms tightly round his neck.
"Kiss me," she whispered, "and call me 'dear
heart.' I love to hear you say 'dear heart.' And bring me a book to read
to-morrow. No more Sam Pepys, but something trick and trashy. I've been wild
for something to do all day. I felt like writing letters, but I didn't have
anybody to write to."
"Write to me," said Horace. "I'll read them."
"I wish I could," breathed Marcia. "If I knew words
enough I could write you the longest love-letter in the world—and never get
tired."
But after two more months Marcia grew very tired indeed, and for a
row of nights it was a very anxious, weary-looking young athlete who walked out
before the Hippodrome crowd. Then there were two days when his place was taken
by a young man who wore pale blue instead of white, and got very little
applause. But after the two days Horace appeared again, and those who sat close
to the stage remarked an expression of beatific happiness on that young
acrobat's face even when he was twisting breathlessly in the air an the middle
of his amazing and original shoulder swing. After that performance he laughed
at the elevator man and dashed up the stairs to the flat five steps at a
time—and then tiptoed very carefully into a quiet room.
"Marcia," he whispered.
"Hello!" She smiled up at him wanly. "Horace,
there's something I want you to do. Look in my top bureau drawer and you'll
find a big stack of paper. It's a book—sort of—Horace. I wrote it down in these
last three months while I've been laid up. I wish you'd take it to that Peter
Boyce Wendell who put my letter in his paper. He could tell you whether it'd be
a good book. I wrote it just the way I talk, just the way I wrote that letter
to him. It's just a story about a lot of things that happened to me. Will you
take it to him, Horace?"
"Yes, darling."
He leaned over the bed until his head was beside her on the
pillow, and began stroking back her yellow hair.
"Dearest Marcia," he said softly.
"No," she murmured, "call me what I told you to
call me."
"Dear heart," he whispered passionately—"dearest
heart."
"What'll we call her?"
They rested a minute in happy, drowsy content, while Horace
considered.
"We'll call her Marcia Hume Tarbox," he said at length.
"Why the Hume?"
"Because he's the fellow who first introduced us."
"That so?" she murmured, sleepily surprised. "I
thought his name was Moon."
Her eyes dosed, and after a moment the slow lengthening surge of
the bedclothes over her breast showed that she was asleep.
Horace tiptoed over to the bureau and opening the top drawer found
a heap of closely scrawled, lead-smeared pages. He looked at the first sheet:
SANDRA
PEPYS, SYNCOPATED BY Marcia Tarbox
He smiled. So Samuel Pepys had made an impression on her after
all. He turned a page and began to read. His smile deepened—he read on. Half an
hour passed and he became aware that Marcia had waked and was watching him from
the bed.
"Honey," came in a whisper.
"What Marcia?"
"Do you like it?"
Horace coughed.
"I seem to be reading on. It's bright."
"Take it to Peter Boyce Wendell. Tell him you got the highest
marks in Princeton once and that you ought to know when a book's good. Tell him
this one's a world beater."
"All right, Marcia," Horace said gently.
Her eyes closed again and Horace crossing over kissed her
forehead—stood there for a moment with a look of tender pity. Then he left the
room.
All that night the sprawly writing on the pages, the constant
mistakes in spelling and grammar, and the weird punctuation danced before his
eyes. He woke several times in the night, each time full of a welling chaotic
sympathy for this desire of Marcia's soul to express itself in words. To him
there was something infinitely pathetic about it, and for the first time in
months he began to turn over in his mind his own half-forgotten dreams.
He had meant to write a series of books, to popularize the new
realism as Schopenhauer had popularized pessimism and William James pragmatism.
But life hadn't come that way. Life took hold of people and forced
them into flying rings. He laughed to think of that rap at his door, the
diaphanous shadow in Hume, Marcia's threatened kiss.
"And it's still me," he said aloud in wonder as he lay
awake in the darkness. "I'm the man who sat in Berkeley with temerity to
wonder if that rap would have had actual existence had my ear not been there to
hear it. I'm still that man. I could be electrocuted for the crimes he
committed.
"Poor gauzy souls trying to express ourselves in something
tangible. Marcia with her written book; I with my unwritten ones. Trying to
choose our mediums and then taking what we get—and being glad."
V
"Sandra Pepys, Syncopated," with an introduction by
Peter Boyce Wendell the columnist, appeared serially in Jordan's
Magazine, and came out in book form in March. From its first published
instalment it attracted attention far and wide. A trite enough subject—a girl
from a small New Jersey town coming to New York to go on the stage—treated
simply, with a peculiar vividness of phrasing and a haunting undertone of
sadness in the very inadequacy of its vocabulary, it made an irresistible
appeal.
Peter Boyce Wendell, who happened at that time to be advocating
the enrichment of the American language by the immediate adoption of expressive
vernacular words, stood as its sponsor and thundered his indorsement over the
placid bromides of the conventional reviewers.
Marcia received three hundred dollars an instalment for the serial
publication, which came at an opportune time, for though Horace's monthly
salary at the Hippodrome was now more than Marcia's had ever been, young Marcia
was emitting shrill cries which they interpreted as a demand for country air.
So early April found them installed in a bungalow in Westchester County, with a
place for a lawn, a place for a garage, and a place for everything, including a
sound-proof impregnable study, in which Marcia faithfully promised Mr. Jordan
she would shut herself up when her daughter's demands began to be abated, and
compose immortally illiterate literature.
"It's not half bad," thought Horace one night as he was
on his way from the station to his house. He was considering several prospects
that had opened up, a four months' vaudeville offer in five figures, a chance
to go back to Princeton in charge of all gymnasium work. Odd! He had once
intended to go back there in charge of all philosophic work, and now he had not
even been stirred by the arrival in New York of Anton Laurier, his old idol.
The gravel crunched raucously under his heel. He saw the lights of
his sitting-room gleaming and noticed a big car standing in the drive. Probably
Mr. Jordan again, come to persuade Marcia to settle down' to work.
She had heard the sound of his approach and her form was
silhouetted against the lighted door as she came out to meet him. "There's
some Frenchman here," she whispered nervously. "I can't pronounce his
name, but he sounds awful deep. You'll have to jaw with him."
"What Frenchman?"
"You can't prove it by me. He drove up an hour ago with Mr.
Jordan, and said he wanted to meet Sandra Pepys, and all that sort of
thing."
Two men rose from chairs as they went inside.
"Hello Tarbox," said Jordan. "I've just been
bringing together two celebrities. I've brought M'sieur Laurier out with me.
M'sieur Laurier, let me present Mr. Tarbox, Mrs. Tarbox's husband."
"Not Anton Laurier!" exclaimed Horace.
"But, yes. I must come. I have to come. I have read the book
of Madame, and I have been charmed"—he fumbled in his pocket—"ah I
have read of you too. In this newspaper which I read to-day it has your
name."
He finally produced a clipping from a magazine.
"Read it!" he said eagerly. "It has about you
too."
Horace's eye skipped down the page.
"A distinct contribution to American dialect
literature," it said. "No attempt at literary tone; the book derives
its very quality from this fact, as did 'Huckleberry Finn.'"
Horace's eyes caught a passage lower down; he became suddenly
aghast—read on hurriedly:
"Marcia Tarbox's connection with the stage is not only as a
spectator but as the wife of a performer. She was married last year to Horace
Tarbox, who every evening delights the children at the Hippodrome with his
wondrous flying performance. It is said that the young couple have dubbed
themselves Head and Shoulders, referring doubtless to the fact that Mrs. Tarbox
supplies the literary and mental qualities, while the supple and agile shoulder
of her husband contribute their share to the family fortunes.
"Mrs. Tarbox seems to merit that much-abused title—'prodigy.'
Only twenty——"
Horace stopped reading, and with a very odd expression in his eyes
gazed intently at Anton Laurier.
"I want to advise you—" he began hoarsely.
"What?"
"About raps. Don't answer them! Let them alone—have a padded
door."
There was a rough stone
age and a smooth stone age and a bronze age, and many years afterward a
cut-glass age. In the cut-glass age, when young ladies had persuaded young men
with long, curly mustaches to marry them, they sat down several months
afterward and wrote thank-you notes for all sorts of cut-glass
presents—punch-bowls, finger-bowls, dinner-glasses, wine-glasses, ice-cream dishes,
bonbon dishes, decanters, and vases—for, though cut glass was nothing new in
the nineties, it was then especially busy reflecting the dazzling light of
fashion from the Back Bay to the fastnesses of the Middle West.
After the wedding the punch-bowls were arranged in the sideboard
with the big bowl in the centre; the glasses were set up in the china-closet;
the candlesticks were put at both ends of things—and then the struggle for
existence began. The bonbon dish lost its little handle and became a pin-tray
upstairs; a promenading cat knocked the little bowl off the sideboard, and the
hired girl chipped the middle-sized one with the sugar-dish; then the
wine-glasses succumbed to leg fractures, and even the dinner-glasses
disappeared one by one like the ten little niggers, the last one ending up,
scarred and maimed as a tooth-brush holder among other shabby genteels on the
bathroom shelf. But by the time all this had happened the cut-glass age was
over, anyway.
It was well past its first glory on the day the curious Mrs. Roger
Fairboalt came to see the beautiful Mrs. Harold Piper.
"My dear," said the curious Mrs. Roger
Fairboalt, "I love your house. I think it's quite artistic."
"I'm so glad," said the beautiful Mrs.
Harold Piper, lights appearing in her young, dark eyes; "and you must come
often. I'm almost always alone in the afternoon."
Mrs. Fairboalt would have liked to remark that she didn't believe
this at all and couldn't see how she'd be expected to—it was all over town that
Mr. Freddy Gedney had been dropping in on Mrs. Piper five afternoons a week for
the past six months. Mrs. Fairboalt was at that ripe age where she distrusted
all beautiful women——
"I love the dining-room most," she said,
"all that marvellous china, and that huge cut-glass
bowl."
Mrs. Piper laughed, so prettily that Mrs. Fairboalt's lingering
reservations about the Freddy Gedney story quite vanished.
"Oh, that big bowl!" Mrs. Piper's mouth forming the
words was a vivid rose petal. "There's a story about that bowl——"
"Oh——"
"You remember young Carleton Canby? Well, he was very
attentive at one time, and the night I told him I was going to marry Harold,
seven years ago in ninety-two, he drew himself way up and said: 'Evylyn, I'm
going to give a present that's as hard as you are and as beautiful and as empty
and as easy to see through.' He frightened me a little—his eyes were so black.
I thought he was going to deed me a haunted house or something that would
explode when you opened it. That bowl came, and of course it's beautiful. Its diameter
or circumference or something is two and a half feet—or perhaps it's three and
a half. Anyway, the sideboard is really too small for it; it sticks way
out."
"My dear, wasn't that odd! And he
left town about then didn't he?" Mrs. Fairboalt was scribbling italicized
notes on her memory—"hard, beautiful, empty, and easy to see
through."
"Yes, he went West—or South—or somewhere," answered Mrs.
Piper, radiating that divine vagueness that helps to lift beauty out of time.
Mrs. Fairboalt drew on her gloves, approving the effect of
largeness given by the open sweep from the spacious music-room through the
library, disclosing a part of the dining-room beyond. It was really the nicest
smaller house in town, and Mrs. Piper had talked of moving to a larger one on
Devereaux Avenue. Harold Piper must be coining money.
As she turned into the sidewalk under the gathering autumn dusk
she assumed that disapproving, faintly unpleasant expression that almost all
successful women of forty wear on the street.
If _I_ were Harold Piper, she thought, I'd spend a little less
time on business and a little more time at home. Some friend should
speak to him.
But if Mrs. Fairboalt had considered it a successful afternoon she
would have named it a triumph had she waited two minutes longer. For while she
was still a black receding figure a hundred yards down the street, a very
good-looking distraught young man turned up the walk to the Piper house. Mrs.
Piper answered the door-bell herself, and with a rather dismayed expression led
him quickly into the library.
"I had to see you," he began wildly; "your note
played the devil with me. Did Harold frighten you into this?"
She shook her head.
"I'm through, Fred," she said slowly, and her lips had
never looked to him so much like tearings from a rose. "He came home last
night sick with it. Jessie Piper's sense of duty was to much for her, so she
went down to his office and told him. He was hurt and—oh, I can't help seeing
it his way, Fred. He says we've been club gossip all summer and he didn't know
it, and now he understands snatches of conversation he's caught and veiled
hints people have dropped about me. He's mighty angry, Fred, and he loves me
and I love him—rather."
Gedney nodded slowly and half closed his eyes.
"Yes," he said "yes, my trouble's like yours. I can
see other people's points of view too plainly." His gray eyes met her dark
ones frankly. "The blessed thing's over. My God, Evylyn, I've been sitting
down at the office all day looking at the outside of your letter, and looking
at it and looking at it——"
"You've got to go, Fred," she said steadily, and the
slight emphasis of hurry in her voice was a new thrust for him. "I gave
him my word of honor I wouldn't see you. I know just how far I can go with
Harold, and being here with you this evening is one of the things I can't
do."
They were still standing, and as she spoke she made a little
movement toward the door. Gedney looked at her miserably, trying, here at the end,
to treasure up a last picture of her—and then suddenly both of them were
stiffened into marble at the sound of steps on the walk outside. Instantly her
arm reached out grasping the lapel of his coat—half urged, half swung him
through the big door into the dark dining-room.
"I'll make him go up-stairs," she whispered close to his
ear; "don't move till you hear him on the stairs. Then go out the front
way."
Then he was alone listening as she greeted her husband in the
hall.
Harold Piper was thirty-six, nine years older than his wife. He
was handsome—with marginal notes: these being eyes that were too close
together, and a certain woodenness when his face was in repose. His attitude
toward this Gedney matter was typical of all his attitudes. He had told Evylyn
that he considered the subject closed and would never reproach her nor allude
to it in any form; and he told himself that this was rather a big way of
looking at it—that she was not a little impressed. Yet, like all men who are
preoccupied with their own broadness, he was exceptionally narrow.
He greeted Evylyn with emphasized cordiality this evening.
"You'll have to hurry and dress, Harold," she said
eagerly; "we're going to the Bronsons'."
He nodded.
"It doesn't take me long to dress, dear," and, his words
trailing off, he walked on into the library. Evylyn's heart clattered loudly.
"Harold——" she began, with a little catch in her voice,
and followed him in. He was lighting a cigarette. "You'll have to hurry,
Harold," she finished, standing in the doorway.
"Why?" he asked a trifle impatiently; "you're not
dressed yourself yet, Evie."
He stretched out in a Morris chair and unfolded a newspaper. With
a sinking sensation Evylyn saw that this meant at least ten minutes—and Gedney
was standing breathless in the next room. Supposing Harold decided that before
he went upstairs he wanted a drink from the decanter on the sideboard. Then it
occurred to her to forestall this contingency by bringing him the decanter and
a glass. She dreaded calling his attention to the dining-room in any way, but
she couldn't risk the other chance.
But at the same moment Harold rose and, throwing his paper down,
came toward her.
"Evie, dear," he said, bending and putting his arms
about her, "I hope you're not thinking about last night——" She moved
close to him, trembling. "I know," he continued, "it was just an
imprudent friendship on your part. We all make mistakes."
Evylyn hardly heard him. She was wondering if by sheer clinging to
him she could draw him out and up the stairs. She thought of playing sick,
asking to be carried up—unfortunately she knew he would lay her on the couch
and bring her whiskey.
Suddenly her nervous tension moved up a last impossible notch. She
had heard a very faint but quite unmistakable creak from the floor of the
dining room. Fred was trying to get out the back way.
Then her heart took a flying leap as a hollow ringing note like a
gong echoed and re-echoed through the house. Gedney's arm had struck the big
cut-glass bowl.
"What's that!" cried Harold. "Who's there?"
She clung to him but he broke away, and the room seemed to crash
about her ears. She heard the pantry-door swing open, a scuffle, the rattle of
a tin pan, and in wild despair she rushed into the kitchen and pulled up the
gas. Her husband's arm slowly unwound from Gedney's neck, and he stood there
very still, first in amazement, then with pain dawning in his face.
"My golly!" he said in bewilderment, and then repeated:
"My golly!"
He turned as if to jump again at Gedney, stopped, his muscles
visibly relaxed, and he gave a bitter little laugh.
"You people—you people——" Evylyn's arms were around him
and her eyes were pleading with him frantically, but he pushed her away and
sank dazed into a kitchen chair, his face like porcelain. "You've been
doing things to me, Evylyn. Why, you little devil! You little devil!"
She had never felt so sorry for him; she had never loved him so
much.
"It wasn't her fault," said Gedney rather humbly.
"I just came." But Piper shook his head, and his expression when he
stared up was as if some physical accident had jarred his mind into a temporary
inability to function. His eyes, grown suddenly pitiful, struck a deep,
unsounded chord in Evylyn—and simultaneously a furious anger surged in her. She
felt her eyelids burning; she stamped her foot violently; her hands scurried
nervously over the table as if searching for a weapon, and then she flung
herself wildly at Gedney.
"Get out!" she screamed, dark eves blazing, little fists
beating helplessly on his outstretched arm. "You did this! Get out of
here—get out—get out! get out!"
II
Concerning Mrs. Harold Piper at thirty-five, opinion was
divided—women said she was still handsome; men said she was pretty no longer.
And this was probably because the qualities in her beauty that women had feared
and men had followed had vanished. Her eyes were still as large and as dark and
as sad, but the mystery had departed; their sadness was no longer eternal, only
human, and she had developed a habit, when she was startled or annoyed, of
twitching her brows together and blinking several times. Her mouth also had
lost: the red had receded and the faint down-turning of its corners when she
smiled, that had added to the sadness of the eyes and been vaguely mocking and
beautiful, was quite gone. When she smiled now the corners of her lips turned
up. Back in the days when she revelled in her own beauty Evylyn had enjoyed
that smile of hers—she had accentuated it. When she stopped accentuating it, it
faded out and the last of her mystery with it.
Evylyn had ceased accentuating her smile within a month after the
Freddy Gedney affair. Externally things had gone an very much as they had
before. But in those few minutes during which she had discovered how much she
loved her husband, Evylyn had realized how indelibly she had hurt him. For a
month she struggled against aching silences, wild reproaches and
accusations—she pled with him, made quiet, pitiful little love to him, and he
laughed at her bitterly—and then she, too, slipped gradually into silence and a
shadowy, impenetrable barrier dropped between them. The surge of love that had
risen in her she lavished on Donald, her little boy, realizing him almost
wonderingly as a part of her life.
The next year a piling up of mutual interests and responsibilities
and some stray flicker from the past brought husband and wife together
again—but after a rather pathetic flood of passion Evylyn realized that her
great opportunity was gone. There simply wasn't anything left. She might have
been youth and love for both—but that time of silence had slowly dried up the
springs of affection and her own desire to drink again of them was dead.
She began for the first time to seek women friends, to prefer
books she had read before, to sew a little where she could watch her two
children to whom she was devoted. She worried about little things—if she saw
crumbs on the dinner-table her mind drifted off the conversation: she was
receding gradually into middle age.
Her thirty-fifth birthday had been an exceptionally busy one, for
they were entertaining on short notice that night, as she stood in her bedroom
window in the late afternoon she discovered that she was quite tired. Ten years
before she would have lain down and slept, but now she had a feeling that
things needed watching: maids were cleaning down-stairs, bric-à-brac was all
over the floor, and there were sure to be grocery-men that had to be talked to
imperatively—and then there was a letter to write Donald, who was fourteen and
in his first year away at school.
She had nearly decided to lie down, nevertheless, when she heard a
sudden familiar signal from little Julie down-stairs. She compressed her lips,
her brows twitched together, and she blinked.
"Julie!" she called.
"Ah-h-h-ow!" prolonged Julie plaintively. Then the voice
of Hilda, the second maid, floated up the stairs.
"She cut herself a little, Mis' Piper."
Evylyn flew to her sewing-basket, rummaged until she found a torn
handkerchief, and hurried downstairs. In a moment Julie was crying in her arms
as she searched for the cut, faint, disparaging evidences of which appeared on
Julie's dress.
"My thu-umb!" explained Julie.
"Oh-h-h-h, t'urts."
"It was the bowl here, the he one," said Hilda
apologetically. "It was waitin' on the floor while I polished the
sideboard, and Julie come along an' went to foolin' with it. She yust scratch
herself."
Evylyn frowned heavily at Hilda, and twisting Julie decisively in
her lap, began tearing strips of the handkerchief.
"Now—let's see it, dear."
Julie held it up and Evelyn pounced.
"There!"
Julie surveyed her swathed thumb doubtfully. She crooked it; it
waggled. A pleased, interested look appeared in her tear-stained face. She
sniffled and waggled it again.
"You precious!" cried Evylyn and kissed her,
but before she left the room she levelled another frown at Hilda. Careless!
Servants all that way nowadays. If she could get a good Irishwoman—but you
couldn't any more—and these Swedes——
At five o'clock Harold arrived and, coming up to her room,
threatened in a suspiciously jovial tone to kiss her thirty-five times for her
birthday. Evylyn resisted.
"You've been drinking," she said shortly, and then added
qualitatively, "a little. You know I loathe the smell of it."
"Evie," he said after a pause, seating himself in a
chair by the window, "I can tell you something now. I guess you've known
things haven't beep going quite right down-town."
She was standing at the window combing her hair, but at these
words she turned and looked at him.
"How do you mean? You've always said there was room for more
than one wholesale hardware house in town." Her voice expressed some
alarm.
"There was," said Harold significantly,
"but this Clarence Ahearn is a smart man."
"I was surprised when you said he was coming to dinner."
"Evie," he went on, with another slap at his knee,
"after January first 'The Clarence Ahearn Company' becomes 'The Ahearn,
Piper Company'—and 'Piper Brothers' as a company ceases to exist."
Evylyn was startled. The sound of his name in second place was
somehow hostile to her; still he appeared jubilant.
"I don't understand, Harold."
"Well, Evie, Ahearn has been fooling around with Marx. If
those two had combined we'd have been the little fellow, struggling along,
picking up smaller orders, hanging back on risks. It's a question of capital,
Evie, and 'Ahearn and Marx' would have had the business just like 'Ahearn and
Piper' is going to now." He paused and coughed and a little cloud of
whiskey floated up to her nostrils. "Tell you the truth, Evie, I've
suspected that Ahearn's wife had something to do with it. Ambitious little
lady, I'm told. Guess she knew the Marxes couldn't help her much here."
"Is she—common?" asked Evie.
"Never met her, I'm sure—but I don't doubt it. Clarence Ahearn's
name's been up at the Country Club five months—no action taken." He waved
his hand disparagingly. "Ahearn and I had lunch together to-day and just
about clinched it, so I thought it'd be nice to have him and his wife up
to-night—just have nine, mostly family. After all, it's a big thing for me, and
of course we'll have to see something of them, Evie."
"Yes," said Evie thoughtfully, "I suppose we
will."
Evylyn was not disturbed over the social end of it—but the idea of
"Piper Brothers" becoming "The Ahearn, Piper Company"
startled her. It seemed like going down in the world.
Half an hour later, as she began to dress for dinner, she heard
his voice from down-stairs.
"Oh, Evie, come down!"
She went out into the hall and called over the banister:
"What is it?"
"I want you to help me make some of that punch before
dinner."
Hurriedly rehooking her dress, she descended the stairs and found
him grouping the essentials on the dining-room table. She went to the sideboard
and, lifting one of the bowls, carried it over.
"Oh, no," he protested, "let's use the big one.
There'll be Ahearn and his wife and you and I and Milton, that's five, and Tom
and Jessie, that's seven: and your sister and Joe Ambler, that's nine. You
don't know how quick that stuff goes when you make it."
"We'll use this bowl," she insisted. "It'll hold
plenty. You know how Tom is."
Tom Lowrie, husband to Jessie, Harold's first cousin, was rather
inclined to finish anything in a liquid way that he began.
Harold shook his head.
"Don't be foolish. That one holds only about three quarts and
there's nine of us, and the servants'll want some—and it isn't strong punch.
It's so much more cheerful to have a lot, Evie; we don't have to drink all of
it."
"I say the small one."
Again he shook his head obstinately.
"No; be reasonable."
"I am reasonable," she said shortly.
"I don't want any drunken men in the house."
"Who said you did?"
"Then use the small bowl."
"Now, Evie——"
He grasped the smaller bowl to lift it back. Instantly her hands
were on it, holding it down. There was a momentary struggle, and then, with a
little exasperated grunt, he raised his side, slipped it from her fingers, and
carried it to the sideboard.
She looked at him and tried to make her expression contemptuous,
but he only laughed. Acknowledging her defeat but disclaiming all future
interest in the punch, she left the room.
III
At seven-thirty, her cheeks glowing and her high-piled hair
gleaming with a suspicion of brilliantine, Evylyn descended the stairs. Mrs.
Ahearn, a little woman concealing a slight nervousness under red hair and an
extreme Empire gown, greeted her volubly. Evelyn disliked her on the spot, but
the husband she rather approved of. He had keen blue eyes and a natural gift of
pleasing people that might have made him, socially, had he not so obviously
committed the blunder of marrying too early in his career.
"I'm glad to know Piper's wife," he said simply.
"It looks as though your husband and I are going to see a lot of each
other in the future."
She bowed, smiled graciously, and turned to greet the others:
Milton Piper, Harold's quiet, unassertive younger brother; the two Lowries,
Jessie and Tom; Irene, her own unmarried sister; and finally Joe Ambler, a
confirmed bachelor and Irene's perennial beau.
Harold led the way into dinner.
"We're having a punch evening," he announced
jovially—Evylyn saw that he had already sampled his concoction—"so there
won't be any cocktails except the punch. It's m' wife's greatest achievement,
Mrs. Ahearn; she'll give you the recipe if you want it; but owing to a
slight"—he caught his wife's eye and paused —"to a slight
indisposition; I'm responsible for this batch. Here's how!"
All through dinner there was punch, and Evylyn, noticing that
Ahearn and Milton Piper and all the women were shaking their heads negatively
at the maid, knew she had been right about the bowl; it was still half full.
She resolved to caution Harold directly afterward, but when the women left the
table Mrs. Ahearn cornered her, and she found herself talking cities and
dressmakers with a polite show of interest.
"We've moved around a lot," chattered Mrs. Ahearn, her
red head nodding violently. "Oh, yes, we've never stayed so long in a town
before—but I do hope we're here for good. I like it here; don't you?"
"Well, you see, I've always lived here, so, naturally——"
"Oh, that's true," said Mrs. Ahearn and laughed.
Clarence always used to tell me he had to have a wife he could come home to and
say: "Well, we're going to Chicago to-morrow to live, so pack up."
"I got so I never expected to live anywhere."
She laughed her little laugh again; Evylyn suspected that it was her society
laugh.
"Your husband is a very able man, I imagine."
"Oh, yes," Mrs. Ahearn assured her eagerly. "He's
brainy, Clarence is. Ideas and enthusiasm, you know. Finds out what he wants
and then goes and gets it."
Evylyn nodded. She was wondering if the men were still drinking
punch back in the dining-room. Mrs. Ahearn's history kept unfolding jerkily,
but Evylyn had ceased to listen. The first odor of massed cigars began to drift
in. It wasn't really a large house, she reflected; on an evening like this the
library sometimes grew blue with smoke, and next day one had to leave the
windows open for hours to air the heavy staleness out of the curtains. Perhaps
this partnership might . . . she began to speculate on a new house . . .
Mrs. Ahearn's voice drifted in on her:
"I really would like the recipe if you have it written down
somewhere——"
Then there was a sound of chairs in the dining-room and the men
strolled in. Evylyn saw at once that her worst fears were realized. Harold's
face was flushed and his words ran together at the ends of sentences, while Tom
Lowrie lurched when he walked and narrowly missed Irene's lap when he tried to
sink onto the couch beside her. He sat there blinking dazedly at the company.
Evylyn found herself blinking back at him, but she saw no humor in it. Joe
Ambler was smiling contentedly and purring on his cigar. Only Ahearn and Milton
Piper seemed unaffected.
"It's a pretty fine town, Ahearn," said Ambler,
"you'll find that."
"I've found it so," said Ahearn pleasantly.
"You find it more, Ahearn," said Harold, nodding
emphatically "'f I've an'thin' do 'th it."
He soared into a eulogy of the city, and Evylyn wondered
uncomfortably if it bored every one as it bored her. Apparently not. They were
all listening attentively. Evylyn broke in at the first gap.
"Where've you been living, Mr. Ahearn?" she asked
interestedly. Then she remembered that Mrs. Ahearn had told her, but it didn't
matter. Harold mustn't talk so much. He was such an ass when
he'd been drinking. But he plopped directly back in.
"Tell you, Ahearn. Firs' you wanna get a house up here on the
hill. Get Stearne house or Ridgeway house. Wanna have it so people say:
'There's Ahearn house.' Solid, you know, tha's effec' it gives."
Evylyn flushed. This didn't sound right at all. Still Ahearn
didn't seem to notice anything amiss, only nodded gravely.
"Have you been looking——" But her words trailed off
unheard as Harold's voice boomed on.
"Get house—tha's start. Then you get know people. Snobbish
town first toward outsider, but not long—after know you. People like
you"—he indicated Ahearn and his wife with a sweeping gesture—"all
right. Cordial as an'thin' once get by first barrer-bar-barrer—" He
swallowed, and then said "barrier," repeated it masterfully.
Evylyn looked appealingly at her brother-in-law, but before he
could intercede a thick mumble had come crowding out of Tom Lowrie, hindered by
the dead cigar which he gripped firmly with his teeth.
"Huma uma ho huma ahdy um——"
"What?" demanded Harold earnestly.
Resignedly and with difficulty Tom removed the cigar—that is, he
removed part of it, and then blew the remainder with a whut sound
across the room, where it landed liquidly and limply in Mrs. Ahearn's lap.
"Beg pardon," he mumbled, and rose with the vague
intention of going after it. Milton's hand on his coat collapsed him in time,
and Mrs. Ahearn not ungracefully flounced the tobacco from her skirt to the
floor, never once looking at it.
"I was sayin'," continued Tom thickly, "'fore 'at
happened,"—he waved his hand apologetically toward Mrs. Ahearn—"I was
sayin' I heard all truth that Country Club matter."
Milton leaned and whispered something to him.
"Lemme 'lone," he said petulantly; "know what I'm
doin'. 'Ats what they came for."
Evylyn sat there in a panic, trying to make her mouth form words.
She saw her sister's sardonic expression and Mrs. Ahearn's face turning a vivid
red. Ahearn was looking down at his watch-chain, fingering it.
"I heard who's been keepin' y' out, an' he's not a bit
better'n you. I can fix whole damn thing up. Would've before, but I didn't know
you. Harol' tol' me you felt bad about the thing——"
Milton Piper rose suddenly and awkwardly to his feet. In a second
every one was standing tensely and Milton was saying something very hurriedly
about having to go early, and the Ahearns were listening with eager intentness.
Then Mrs. Ahearn swallowed and turned with a forced smile toward Jessie. Evylyn
saw Tom lurch forward and put his hand on Ahearns shoulder—and suddenly she was
listening to a new, anxious voice at her elbow, and, turning, found Hilda, the
second maid.
"Please, Mis' Piper, I tank Yulie got her hand poisoned. It's
all swole up and her cheeks is hot and she's moanin' an' groanin'——"
"Julie is?" Evylyn asked sharply. The party suddenly
receded. She turned quickly, sought with her eyes for Mrs. Ahearn, slipped
toward her.
"If you'll excuse me, Mrs.—" She had momentarily
forgotten the name, but she went right on: "My little girl's been taken
sick. I'll be down when I can." She turned and ran quickly up the stairs,
retaining a confused picture of rays of cigar smoke and a loud discussion in
the centre of the room that seemed to be developing into an argument.
Switching on the light in the nursery, she found Julie tossing
feverishly and giving out odd little cries. She put her hand against the
cheeks. They were burning. With an exclamation she followed the arm down under
the cover until she found the hand. Hilda was right. The whole thumb was
swollen to the wrist and in the centre was a little inflamed sore.
Blood-poisoning! her mind cried in terror. The bandage had come off the cut and
she'd gotten something in it. She'd cut it at three o'clock—it was now nearly
eleven. Eight hours. Blood-poisoning couldn't possibly develop so soon.
She rushed to the 'phone.
Doctor Martin across the street was out. Doctor Foulke, their
family physician, didn't answer. She racked her brains and in desperation
called her throat specialist, and bit her lip furiously while he looked up the
numbers of two physicians. During that interminable moment she thought she
heard loud voices down-stairs—but she seemed to be in another world now. After
fifteen minutes she located a physician who sounded angry and sulky at being
called out of bed. She ran back to the nursery and, looking at the hand, found
it was somewhat more swollen.
"Oh, God!" she cried, and kneeling beside the bed began
smoothing back Julie's hair over and over. With a vague idea of getting some
hot water, she rose and stared toward the door, but the lace of her dress
caught in the bed-rail and she fell forward on her hands and knees. She
struggled up and jerked frantically at the lace. The bed moved and Julie
groaned. Then more quietly but with suddenly fumbling fingers she found the
pleat in front, tore the whole pannier completely off, and rushed from the
room.
Out in the hall she heard a single loud, insistent voice, but as
she reached the head of the stairs it ceased and an outer door banged.
The music-room came into view. Only Harold and Milton were there,
the former leaning against a chair, his face very pale, his collar open, and
his mouth moving loosely.
"What's the matter?"
Milton looked at her anxiously.
"There was a little trouble——"
Then Harold saw her and, straightening up with an effort, began to
speak.
"Sult m'own cousin m'own house. God damn common nouveau rish.
'Sult m'own cousin——"
"Tom had trouble with Ahearn and Harold interfered,"
said Milton. "My Lord Milton," cried Evylyn, "couldn't you have
done something?"
"I tried; I——"
"Julie's sick," she interrupted; "she's poisoned
herself. Get him to bed if you can."
Harold looked up.
"Julie sick?"
Paying no attention, Evylyn brushed by through the dining-room,
catching sight, with a burst of horror, of the big punch-bowl still on the
table, the liquid from melted ice in its bottom. She heard steps on the front
stairs—it was Milton helping Harold up—and then a mumble: "Why, Julie's
a'righ'."
"Don't let him go into the nursery!" she shouted.
The hours blurred into a nightmare. The doctor arrived just before
midnight and within a half-hour had lanced the wound. He left at two after
giving her the addresses of two nurses to call up and promising to return at
half past six. It was blood-poisoning.
At four, leaving Hilda by the bedside, she went to her room, and
slipping with a shudder out of her evening dress, kicked it into a corner. She
put on a house dress and returned to the nursery while Hilda went to make
coffee.
Not until noon could she bring herself to look into Harold's room,
but when she did it was to find him awake and staring very miserably at the
ceiling. He turned blood-shot hollow eyes upon her. For a minute she hated him,
couldn't speak. A husky voice came from the bed.
"What time is it?"
"Noon."
"I made a damn fool——"
"It doesn't matter," she said sharply. "Julie's got
blood-poisoning. They may"—she choked over the words—"they think
she'll have to lose her hand."
"What?"
"She cut herself on that—that bowl."
"Last night?"
"Oh, what does it matter?" see cried; "she's got
blood-poisoning. Can't you hear?" He looked at her bewildered—sat half-way
up in bed.
"I'll get dressed," he said.
Her anger subsided and a great wave of weariness and pity for him
rolled over her. After all, it was his trouble, too.
"Yes," she answered listlessly, "I suppose you'd
better."
IV
If Evylyn's beauty had hesitated an her early thirties it came to
an abrupt decision just afterward and completely left her. A tentative outlay
of wrinkles on her face suddenly deepened and flesh collected rapidly on her
legs and hips and arms. Her mannerism of drawing her brows together had become
an expression—it was habitual when she was reading or speaking and even while
she slept. She was forty-six.
As in most families whose fortunes have gone down rather than up,
she and Harold had drifted into a colorless antagonism. In repose they looked
at each other with the toleration they might have felt for broken old chairs;
Evylyn worried a little when he was sick and did her best to be cheerful under
the wearying depression of living with a disappointed man.
Family bridge was over for the evening and she sighed with relief.
She had made more mistakes than usual this evening and she didn't care. Irene
shouldn't have made that remark about the infantry being particularly
dangerous. There had been no letter for three weeks now, and, while this was
nothing out of the ordinary, it never failed to make her nervous; naturally she
hadn't known how many clubs were out.
Harold had gone up-stairs, so she stepped out on the porch for a
breath of fresh air. There was a bright glamour of moonlight diffusing on the
sidewalks and lawns, and with a little half yawn, half laugh, she remembered
one long moonlight affair of her youth. It was astonishing to think that life
had once been the sum of her current love-affairs. It was now the sum of her
current problems.
There was the problem of Julie—Julie was thirteen, and lately she
was growing more and more sensitive about her deformity and preferred to stay
always in her room reading. A few years before she had been frightened at the
idea of going to school, and Evylyn could not bring herself to send her, so she
grew up in her mother's shadow, a pitiful little figure with the artificial
hand that she made no attempt to use but kept forlornly in her pocket. Lately
she had been taking lessons in using it because Evylyn had feared she would
cease to lift the arm altogether, but after the lessons, unless she made a move
with it in listless obedience to her mother, the little hand would creep back
to the pocket of her dress. For a while her dresses were made without pockets,
but Julie had moped around the house so miserably at a loss all one month that
Evylyn weakened and never tried the experiment again.
The problem of Donald had been different from the start. She had
attempted vainly to keep him near her as she had tried to teach Julie to lean
less on her—lately the problem of Donald had been snatched out of her hands;
his division had been abroad for three months.
She yawned again—life was a thing for youth. What a happy youth
she must have had! She remembered her pony, Bijou, and the trip to Europe with
her mother when she was eighteen——
"Very, very complicated," she said aloud and severely to
the moon, and, stepping inside, was about to close the door when she heard a
noise in the library and started.
It was Martha, the middle-aged servant: they kept only one now.
"Why, Martha!" she said in surprise.
Martha turned quickly.
"Oh, I thought you was up-stairs. I was jist——"
"Is anything the matter?"
Martha hesitated.
"No; I——" She stood there fidgeting. "It was a
letter, Mrs. Piper, that I put somewhere.
"A letter? Your own letter?" asked Evylyn.
"No, it was to you. 'Twas this afternoon, Mrs. Piper, in the
last mail. The postman give it to me and then the back door-bell rang. I had it
in my hand, so I must have stuck it somewhere. I thought I'd just slip in now
and find it."
"What sort of a letter? From Mr. Donald?"
"No, it was an advertisement, maybe, or a business letter. It
was a long narrow one, I remember."
They began a search through the music-room, looking on trays and
mantelpieces, and then through the library, feeling on the tops of rows of
books. Martha paused in despair.
"I can't think where. I went straight to the kitchen. The
dining-room, maybe." She started hopefully for the dining-room, but turned
suddenly at the sound of a gasp behind her. Evylyn had sat down heavily in a
Morris chair, her brows drawn very close together eyes blanking furiously.
"Are you sick?"
For a minute there was no answer. Evylyn sat there very still and
Martha could see the very quick rise and fall of her bosom.
"Are you sick?" she repeated.
"No," said Evylyn slowly, "but I know where the
letter is. Go 'way, Martha. I know."
Wonderingly, Martha withdrew, and still Evylyn sat there, only the
muscles around her eyes moving—contracting and relaxing and contracting again.
She knew now where the letter was—she knew as well as if she had put it there
herself. And she felt instinctively and unquestionably what the letter was. It
was long and narrow like an advertisement, but up in the corner in large
letters it said "War Department" and, in smaller letters below,
"Official Business." She knew it lay there in the big bowl with her
name in ink on the outside and her soul's death within.
Rising uncertainly, she walked toward the dining-room, feeling her
way along the bookcases and through the doorway. After a moment she found the
light and switched it on.
There was the bowl, reflecting the electric light in crimson
squares edged with black and yellow squares edged with blue, ponderous and
glittering, grotesquely and triumphantly ominous. She took a step forward and
paused again; another step and she would see over the top and into the
inside—another step and she would see an edge of white—another step—her hands
fell on the rough, cold surface—
In a moment she was tearing it open, fumbling with an obstinate
fold, holding it before her while the typewritten page glared out and struck at
her. Then it fluttered like a bird to the floor. The house that had seemed
whirring, buzzing a moment since, was suddenly very quiet; a breath of air
crept in through the open front door carrying the noise of a passing motor; she
heard faint sounds from upstairs and then a grinding racket in the pipe behind
the bookcases-her husband turning of a water-tap——
And in that instant it was as if this were not, after all,
Donald's hour except in so far as he was a marker in the insidious contest that
had gone on in sudden surges and long, listless interludes between Evylyn and
this cold, malignant thing of beauty, a gift of enmity from a man whose face
she had long since forgotten. With its massive, brooding passivity it lay there
in the centre of her house as it had lain for years, throwing out the ice-like
beams of a thousand eyes, perverse glitterings merging each into each, never
aging, never changing.
Evylyn sat down on the edge of the table and stared at it
fascinated. It seemed to be smiling now, a very cruel smile, as if to say:
"You see, this time I didn't have to hurt you directly. I
didn't bother. You know it was I who took your son away. You know how cold I am
and how hard and how beautiful, because once you were just as cold and hard and
beautiful."
The bowl seemed suddenly to turn itself over and then to distend
and swell until it became a great canopy that glittered and trembled over the
room, over the house, and, as the walls melted slowly into mist, Evylyn saw
that it was still moving out, out and far away from her, shutting off far
horizons and suns and moons and stars except as inky blots seen faintly through
it. And under it walked all the people, and the light that came through to them
was refracted and twisted until shadow seamed light and light seemed
shadow—until the whole panoply of the world became changed and distorted under
the twinkling heaven of the bowl.
Then there came a far-away, booming voice like a low, clear bell.
It came from the centre of the bowl and down the great sides to the ground and
then bounced toward her eagerly.
"You see, I am fate," it shouted, "and stronger
than your puny plans; and I am how-things-turn-out and I am different from your
little dreams, and I am the flight of time and the end of beauty and
unfulfilled desire; all the accidents and imperceptions and the little minutes
that shape the crucial hours are mine. I am the exception that proves no rules,
the limits of your control, the condiment in the dish of life."
The booming sound stopped; the echoes rolled away over the wide
land to the edge of the bowl that bounded the world and up the great sides and
back to the centre where they hummed for a moment and died. Then the great
walls began slowly to bear down upon her, growing smaller and smaller, coming
closer and closer as if to crush her; and as she clinched her hands and waited
for the swift bruise of the cold glass, the bowl gave a sudden wrench and
turned over—and lay there on the side-board, shining and inscrutable,
reflecting in a hundred prisms, myriad, many-colored glints and gleams and
crossings and interlaces of light.
The cold wind blew in again through to front door, and with a
desperate, frantic energy Evylyn stretched both her arms around the bowl. She
must be quick—she must be strong. She tightened her arms until they ached,
tauted the thin strips of muscle under her soft flesh, and with a mighty effort
raised it and held it. She felt the wind blow cold on her back where her dress
had come apart from the strain of her effort, and as she felt it she turned
toward it and staggered under the great weight out through the library and on
toward the front door. She must be quick—she must be strong. The blood in her
arms throbbed dully and her knees kept giving way under her, but the feel of
the cool glass was good.
Out the front door she tottered and over to the stone steps, and
there, summoning every fibre of her soul and body for a last effort, swung
herself half around—for a second, as she tried to loose her hold, her numb
fingers clung to the rough surface, and in that second she slipped and, losing
balance, toppled forward with a despairing cry, her arms still around the bowl
. . . down . . .
Over the way lights went on; far down the block the crash was
heard, and pedestrians rushed up wonderingly; up-stairs a tired man awoke from
the edge of sleep and a little girl whimpered in a haunted doze. And all over
the moonlit sidewalk around the still, black form, hundreds of prisms and cubes
and splinters of glass reflected the light in little gleams of blue, and black
edged with yellow, and yellow, and crimson edged with black.
After dark on Saturday
night one could stand on the first tee of the golf-course and see the
country-club windows as a yellow expanse over a very black and wavy ocean. The
waves of this ocean, so to speak, were the heads of many curious caddies, a few
of the more ingenious chauffeurs, the golf professional's deaf sister—and there
were usually several stray, diffident waves who might have rolled inside had
they so desired. This was the gallery.
The balcony was inside. It consisted of the circle of wicker
chairs that lined the wall of the combination clubroom and ballroom. At these
Saturday-night dances it was largely feminine; a great babel of middle-aged
ladies with sharp eyes and icy hearts behind lorgnettes and large bosoms. The
main function of the balcony was critical, it occasionally showed grudging
admiration, but never approval, for it is well known among ladies over
thirty-five that when the younger set dance in the summer-time it is with the
very worst intentions in the world, and if they are not bombarded with stony
eyes stray couples will dance weird barbaric interludes in the corners, and the
more popular, more dangerous, girls will sometimes be kissed in the parked
limousines of unsuspecting dowagers.
But, after all, this critical circle is not close enough to the
stage to see the actors' faces and catch the subtler byplay. It can only frown
and lean, ask questions and make satisfactory deductions from its set of
postulates, such as the one which states that every young man with a large
income leads the life of a hunted partridge. It never really appreciates the
drama of the shifting, semi-cruel world of adolescence. No; boxes,
orchestra-circle, principals, and chorus be represented by the medley of faces
and voices that sway to the plaintive African rhythm of Dyer's dance orchestra.
From sixteen-year-old Otis Ormonde, who has two more years at Hill
School, to G. Reece Stoddard, over whose bureau at home hangs a Harvard law
diploma; from little Madeleine Hogue, whose hair still feels strange and
uncomfortable on top of her head, to Bessie MacRae, who has been the life of
the party a little too long—more than ten years—the medley is not only the
centre of the stage but contains the only people capable of getting an unobstructed
view of it.
With a flourish and a bang the music stops. The couples exchange
artificial, effortless smiles, facetiously repeat "la-de-da-da dum-dum,"
and then the clatter of young feminine voices soars over the burst of clapping.
A few disappointed stags caught in midfloor as they had been about
to cut in subsided listlessly back to the walls, because this was not like the
riotous Christmas dances—these summer hops were considered just pleasantly warm
and exciting, where even the younger marrieds rose and performed ancient
waltzes and terrifying fox trots to the tolerant amusement of their younger
brothers and sisters.
Warren McIntyre, who casually attended Yale, being one of the
unfortunate stags, felt in his dinner-coat pocket for a cigarette and strolled
out onto the wide, semidark veranda, where couples were scattered at tables,
filling the lantern-hung night with vague words and hazy laughter. He nodded
here and there at the less absorbed and as he passed each couple some
half-forgotten fragment of a story played in his mind, for it was not a large
city and every one was Who's Who to every one else's past. There, for example,
were Jim Strain and Ethel Demorest, who had been privately engaged for three
years. Every one knew that as soon as Jim managed to hold a job for more than
two months she would marry him. Yet how bored they both looked, and how wearily
Ethel regarded Jim sometimes, as if she wondered why she had trained the vines
of her affection on such a wind-shaken poplar.
Warren was nineteen and rather pitying with those of his friends
who hadn't gone East to college. But, like most boys, he bragged tremendously
about the girls of his city when he was away from it. There was Genevieve
Ormonde, who regularly made the rounds of dances, house-parties, and football
games at Princeton, Yale, Williams, and Cornell; there was black-eyed Roberta
Dillon, who was quite as famous to her own generation as Hiram Johnson or Ty
Cobb; and, of course, there was Marjorie Harvey, who besides having a fairylike
face and a dazzling, bewildering tongue was already justly celebrated for
having turned five cart-wheels in succession during the last pump-and-slipper
dance at New Haven.
Warren, who had grown up across the street from Marjorie, had long
been "crazy about her." Sometimes she seemed to reciprocate his
feeling with a faint gratitude, but she had tried him by her infallible test
and informed him gravely that she did not love him. Her test was that when she
was away from him she forgot him and had affairs with other boys. Warren found
this discouraging, especially as Marjorie had been making little trips all
summer, and for the first two or three days after each arrival home he saw
great heaps of mail on the Harveys' hall table addressed to her in various masculine
handwritings. To make matters worse, all during the month of August she had
been visited by her cousin Bernice from Eau Claire, and it seemed impossible to
see her alone. It was always necessary to hunt round and find some one to take
care of Bernice. As August waned this was becoming more and more difficult.
Much as Warren worshipped Marjorie he had to admit that Cousin
Bernice was sorta dopeless. She was pretty, with dark hair and high color, but
she was no fun on a party. Every Saturday night he danced a long arduous duty
dance with her to please Marjorie, but he had never been anything but bored in
her company.
"Warren"——a soft voice at his elbow broke in upon his
thoughts, and he turned to see Marjorie, flushed and radiant as usual. She laid
a hand on his shoulder and a glow settled almost imperceptibly over him.
"Warren," she whispered "do something for me—dance
with Bernice. She's been stuck with little Otis Ormonde for almost an
hour."
Warren's glow faded.
"Why—sure," he answered half-heartedly.
"You don't mind, do you? I'll see that you don't get
stuck."
"'Sall right."
Marjorie smiled—that smile that was thanks enough.
"You're an angel, and I'm obliged loads."
With a sigh the angel glanced round the veranda, but Bernice and
Otis were not in sight. He wandered back inside, and there in front of the
women's dressing-room he found Otis in the centre of a group of young men who
were convulsed with laughter. Otis was brandishing a piece of timber he had
picked up, and discoursing volubly.
"She's gone in to fix her hair," he announced wildly.
"I'm waiting to dance another hour with her."
Their laughter was renewed.
"Why don't some of you cut in?" cried Otis resentfully.
"She likes more variety."
"Why, Otis," suggested a friend "you've just barely
got used to her."
"Why the two-by-four, Otis?" inquired Warren, smiling.
"The two-by-four? Oh, this? This is a club. When she comes
out I'll hit her on the head and knock her in again."
Warren collapsed on a settee and howled with glee.
"Never mind, Otis," he articulated finally. "I'm
relieving you this time."
Otis simulated a sudden fainting attack and handed the stick to
Warren.
"If you need it, old man," he said hoarsely.
No matter how beautiful or brilliant a girl may be, the reputation
of not being frequently cut in on makes her position at a dance unfortunate.
Perhaps boys prefer her company to that of the butterflies with whom they dance
a dozen times an but, youth in this jazz-nourished generation is
temperamentally restless, and the idea of fox-trotting more than one full fox
trot with the same girl is distasteful, not to say odious. When it comes to
several dances and the intermissions between she can be quite sure that a young
man, once relieved, will never tread on her wayward toes again.
Warren danced the next full dance with Bernice, and finally,
thankful for the intermission, he led her to a table on the veranda. There was
a moment's silence while she did unimpressive things with her fan.
"It's hotter here than in Eau Claire," she said.
Warren stifled a sigh and nodded. It might be for all he knew or
cared. He wondered idly whether she was a poor conversationalist because she
got no attention or got no attention because she was a poor conversationalist.
"You going to be here much longer?" he asked and then
turned rather red. She might suspect his reasons for asking.
"Another week," she answered, and stared at him as if to
lunge at his next remark when it left his lips.
Warren fidgeted. Then with a sudden charitable impulse he decided
to try part of his line on her. He turned and looked at her eyes.
"You've got an awfully kissable mouth," he began
quietly.
This was a remark that he sometimes made to girls at college proms
when they were talking in just such half dark as this. Bernice distinctly
jumped. She turned an ungraceful red and became clumsy with her fan. No one had
ever made such a remark to her before.
"Fresh!"——the word had slipped out before she realized
it, and she bit her lip. Too late she decided to be amused, and offered him a
flustered smile.
Warren was annoyed. Though not accustomed to have that remark
taken seriously, still it usually provoked a laugh or a paragraph of
sentimental banter. And he hated to be called fresh, except in a joking way.
His charitable impulse died and he switched the topic.
"Jim Strain and Ethel Demorest sitting out as usual," he
commented.
This was more in Bernice's line, but a faint regret mingled with
her relief as the subject changed. Men did not talk to her about kissable
mouths, but she knew that they talked in some such way to other girls.
"Oh, yes," she said, and laughed. "I hear they've
been mooning around for years without a red penny. Isn't it silly?"
Warren's disgust increased. Jim Strain was a close friend of his
brother's, and anyway he considered it bad form to sneer at people for not
having money. But Bernice had had no intention of sneering. She was merely
nervous.
II
When Marjorie and Bernice reached home at half after midnight they
said good night at the top of the stairs. Though cousins, they were not
intimates. As a matter of fact Marjorie had no female intimates—she considered
girls stupid. Bernice on the contrary all through this parent-arranged visit
had rather longed to exchange those confidences flavored with giggles and tears
that she considered an indispensable factor in all feminine intercourse. But in
this respect she found Marjorie rather cold; felt somehow the same difficulty
in talking to her that she had in talking to men. Marjorie never giggled, was
never frightened, seldom embarrassed, and in fact had very few of the qualities
which Bernice considered appropriately and blessedly feminine.
As Bernice busied herself with tooth-brush and paste this night
she wondered for the hundredth time why she never had any attention when she
was away from home. That her family were the wealthiest in Eau Claire; that her
mother entertained tremendously, gave little diners for her daughter before all
dances and bought her a car of her own to drive round in, never occurred to her
as factors in her home-town social success. Like most girls she had been
brought up on the warm milk prepared by Annie Fellows Johnston and on novels in
which the female was beloved because of certain mysterious womanly qualities,
always mentioned but never displayed.
Bernice felt a vague pain that she was not at present engaged in
being popular. She did not know that had it not been for Marjorie's campaigning
she would have danced the entire evening with one man; but she knew that even
in Eau Claire other girls with less position and less pulchritude were given a
much bigger rush. She attributed this to something subtly unscrupulous in those
girls. It had never worried her, and if it had her mother would have assured
her that the other girls cheapened themselves and that men really respected
girls like Bernice.
She turned out the light in her bathroom, and on an impulse
decided to go in and chat for a moment with her aunt Josephine, whose light was
still on. Her soft slippers bore her noiselessly down the carpeted hall, but
hearing voices inside she stopped near the partly openers door. Then she caught
her own name, and without any definite intention of eavesdropping lingered—and
the thread of the conversation going on inside pierced her consciousness
sharply as if it had been drawn through with a needle.
"She's absolutely hopeless!" It was Marjorie's voice.
"Oh, I know what you're going to say! So many people have told you how
pretty and sweet she is, and how she can cook! What of it? She has a bum time.
Men don't like her."
"What's a little cheap popularity?"
Mrs. Harvey sounded annoyed.
"It's everything when you're eighteen," said Marjorie
emphatically. "I've done my best. I've been polite and I've made men dance
with her, but they just won't stand being bored. When I think of that gorgeous
coloring wasted on such a ninny, and think what Martha Carey could do with
it—oh!"
"There's no courtesy these days."
Mrs. Harvey's voice implied that modern situations were too much
for her. When she was a girl all young ladies who belonged to nice families had
glorious times.
"Well," said Marjorie, "no girl can permanently
bolster up a lame-duck visitor, because these days it's every girl for herself.
I've even tried to drop hints about clothes and things, and she's been
furious—given me the funniest looks. She's sensitive enough to know she's not
getting away with much, but I'll bet she consoles herself by thinking that
she's very virtuous and that I'm too gay and fickle and will come to a bad end.
All unpopular girls think that way. Sour grapes! Sarah Hopkins refers to
Genevieve and Roberta and me as gardenia girls! I'll bet she'd give ten years
of her life and her European education to be a gardenia girl and have three or
four men in love with her and be cut in on every few feet at dances."
"It seems to me," interrupted Mrs. Harvey rather
wearily, "that you ought to be able to do something for Bernice. I know
she's not very vivacious."
Marjorie groaned.
"Vivacious! Good grief! I've never heard her say anything to
a boy except that it's hot or the floor's crowded or that she's going to school
in New York next year. Sometimes she asks them what kind of car they have and
tells them the kind she has. Thrilling!"
There was a short silence and then Mrs. Harvey took up her
refrain:
"All I know is that other girls not half so sweet and
attractive get partners. Martha Carey, for instance, is stout and loud, and her
mother is distinctly common. Roberta Dillon is so thin this year that she looks
as though Arizona were the place for her. She's dancing herself to death."
"But, mother," objected Marjorie impatiently,
"Martha is cheerful and awfully witty and an awfully slick girl, and
Roberta's a marvellous dancer. She's been popular for ages!"
Mrs. Harvey yawned.
"I think it's that crazy Indian blood in Bernice," continued
Marjorie. "Maybe she's a reversion to type. Indian women all just sat
round and never said anything."
"Go to bed, you silly child," laughed Mrs. Harvey.
"I wouldn't have told you that if I'd thought you were going to remember
it. And I think most of your ideas are perfectly idiotic," she finished
sleepily.
There was another silence, while Marjorie considered whether or
not convincing her mother was worth the trouble. People over forty can seldom
be permanently convinced of anything. At eighteen our convictions are hills
from which we look; at forty-five they are caves in which we hide.
Having decided this, Marjorie said good night. When she came out
into the hall it was quite empty.
III
While Marjorie was breakfasting late next day Bernice came into
the room with a rather formal good morning, sat down opposite, stared intently
over and slightly moistened her lips.
"What's on your mind?" inquired Marjorie, rather
puzzled.
Bernice paused before she threw her hand-grenade.
"I heard what you said about me to your mother last
night."
Marjorie was startled, but she showed only a faintly heightened
color and her voice was quite even when she spoke.
"Where were you?"
"In the hall. I didn't mean to listen—at first."
After an involuntary look of contempt Marjorie dropped her eyes
and became very interested in balancing a stray corn-flake on her finger.
"I guess I'd better go back to Eau Claire—if I'm such a
nuisance." Bernice's lower lip was trembling violently and she continued
on a wavering note: "I've tried to be nice, and—and I've been first
neglected and then insulted. No one ever visited me and got such
treatment."
Marjorie was silent.
"But I'm in the way, I see. I'm a drag on you. Your friends don't
like me." She paused, and then remembered another one of her grievances.
"Of course I was furious last week when you tried to hint to me that that
dress was unbecoming. Don't you think I know how to dress myself?"
"No," murmured less than half-aloud.
"What?"
"I didn't hint anything," said Marjorie succinctly.
"I said, as I remember, that it was better to wear a becoming dress three
times straight than to alternate it with two frights."
"Do you think that was a very nice thing to say?"
"I wasn't trying to be nice." Then after a pause:
"When do you want to go?"
Bernice drew in her breath sharply.
"Oh!" It was a little half-cry.
Marjorie looked up in surprise.
"Didn't you say you were going?"
"Yes, but——"
"Oh, you were only bluffing!"
They stared at each other across the breakfast-table for a moment.
Misty waves were passing before Bernice's eyes, while Marjorie's face wore that
rather hard expression that she used when slightly intoxicated undergraduate's
were making love to her.
"So you were bluffing," she repeated as if it were what
she might have expected.
Bernice admitted it by bursting into tears. Marjorie's eyes showed
boredom.
"You're my cousin," sobbed Bernice. "I'm
v-v-visiting you. I was to stay a month, and if I go home my mother will know
and she'll wah-wonder——"
Marjorie waited until the shower of broken words collapsed into
little sniffles.
"I'll give you my month's allowance," she said coldly,
"and you can spend this last week anywhere you want. There's a very nice
hotel——"
Bernice's sobs rose to a flute note, and rising of a sudden she
fled from the room.
An hour later, while Marjorie was in the library absorbed in composing
one of those non-committal marvelously elusive letters that only a young girl
can write, Bernice reappeared, very red-eyed, and consciously calm. She cast no
glance at Marjorie but took a book at random from the shelf and sat down as if
to read. Marjorie seemed absorbed in her letter and continued writing. When the
clock showed noon Bernice closed her book with a snap.
"I suppose I'd better get my railroad ticket."
This was not the beginning of the speech she had rehearsed
up-stairs, but as Marjorie was not getting her cues—wasn't urging her to be
reasonable; it's an a mistake—it was the best opening she could muster.
"Just wait till I finish this letter," said Marjorie
without looking round. "I want to get it off in the next mail."
After another minute, during which her pen scratched busily, she
turned round and relaxed with an air of "at your service." Again
Bernice had to speak.
"Do you want me to go home?"
"Well," said Marjorie, considering, "I suppose if
you're not having a good time you'd better go. No use being miserable."
"Don't you think common kindness——"
"Oh, please don't quote 'Little Women'!" cried Marjorie
impatiently. "That's out of style."
"You think so?"
"Heavens, yes! What modern girl could live like those inane
females?"
"They were the models for our mothers."
Marjorie laughed.
"Yes, they were—not! Besides, our mothers were all very well
in their way, but they know very little about their daughters' problems."
Bernice drew herself up.
"Please don't talk about my mother."
Marjorie laughed.
"I don't think I mentioned her."
Bernice felt that she was being led away from her subject.
"Do you think you've treated me very well?"
"I've done my best. You're rather hard material to work
with."
The lids of Bernice's eyes reddened.
"I think you're hard and selfish, and you haven't a feminine
quality in you."
"Oh, my Lord!" cried Marjorie in desperation "You
little nut! Girls like you are responsible for all the tiresome colorless
marriages; all those ghastly inefficiencies that pass as feminine qualities.
What a blow it must be when a man with imagination marries the beautiful bundle
of clothes that he's been building ideals round, and finds that she's just a
weak, whining, cowardly mass of affectations!"
Bernice's mouth had slipped half open.
"The womanly woman!" continued Marjorie. "Her whole
early life is occupied in whining criticisms of girls like me who really do
have a good time."
Bernice's jaw descended farther as Marjorie's voice rose.
"There's some excuse for an ugly girl whining. If I'd been
irretrievably ugly I'd never have forgiven my parents for bringing me into the
world. But you're starting life without any handicap—" Marjorie's little
fist clinched, "If you expect me to weep with you you'll be disappointed.
Go or stay, just as you like." And picking up her letters she left the room.
Bernice claimed a headache and failed to appear at luncheon. They
had a matinée date for the afternoon, but the headache persisting, Marjorie
made explanation to a not very downcast boy. But when she returned late in the
afternoon she found Bernice with a strangely set face waiting for her in her
bedroom.
"I've decided," began Bernice without preliminaries,
"that maybe you're right about things—possibly not. But if you'll tell me
why your friends aren't—aren't interested in me I'll see if I can do what you
want me to."
Marjorie was at the mirror shaking down her hair.
"Do you mean it?"
"Yes."
"Without reservations? Will you do exactly what I say?"
"Well, I——"
"Well nothing! Will you do exactly as I say?"
"If they're sensible things."
"They're not! You're no case for sensible things."
"Are you going to make—to recommend——"
"Yes, everything. If I tell you to take boxing-lessons you'll
have to do it. Write home and tell your mother you're going' to stay another
two weeks.
"If you'll tell me——"
"All right—I'll just give you a few examples now. First you
have no ease of manner. Why? Because you're never sure about your personal
appearance. When a girl feels that she's perfectly groomed and dressed she can
forget that part of her. That's charm. The more parts of yourself you can
afford to forget the more charm you have."
"Don't I look all right?"
"No; for instance you never take care of your eyebrows.
They're black and lustrous, but by leaving them straggly they're a blemish.
They'd be beautiful if you'd take care of them in one-tenth the time you take
doing nothing. You're going to brush them so that they'll grow straight."
Bernice raised the brows in question.
"Do you mean to say that men notice eyebrows?"
"Yes—subconsciously. And when you go home you ought to have
your teeth straightened a little. It's almost imperceptible, still——"
"But I thought," interrupted Bernice in bewilderment,
"that you despised little dainty feminine things like that."
"I hate dainty minds," answered Marjorie. "But a
girl has to be dainty in person. If she looks like a million dollars she can
talk about Russia, ping-pong, or the League of Nations and get away with
it."
"What else?"
"Oh, I'm just beginning! There's your dancing."
"Don't I dance all right?"
"No, you don't—you lean on a man; yes, you do—ever so
slightly. I noticed it when we were dancing together yesterday. And you dance
standing up straight instead of bending over a little. Probably some old lady
on the side-line once told you that you looked so dignified that way. But
except with a very small girl it's much harder on the man, and he's the one
that counts."
"Go on." Bernice's brain was reeling.
"Well, you've got to learn to be nice to men who are sad
birds. You look as if you'd been insulted whenever you're thrown with any
except the most popular boys. Why, Bernice, I'm cut in on every few feet—and
who does most of it? Why, those very sad birds. No girl can afford to neglect
them. They're the big part of any crowd. Young boys too shy to talk are the
very best conversational practice. Clumsy boys are the best dancing practice.
If you can follow them and yet look graceful you can follow a baby tank across
a barb-wire sky-scraper."
Bernice sighed profoundly, but Marjorie was not through.
"If you go to a dance and really amuse, say, three sad birds
that dance with you; if you talk so well to them that they forget they're stuck
with you, you've done something. They'll come back next time, and gradually so
many sad birds will dance with you that the attractive boys will see there's no
danger of being stuck—then they'll dance with you."
"Yes," agreed Bernice faintly. "I think I begin to
see."
"And finally," concluded Marjorie, "poise and charm
will just come. You'll wake up some morning knowing you've attained it and men
will know it too."
Bernice rose.
"It's been awfully kind of you—but nobody's ever talked to me
like this before, and I feel sort of startled."
Marjorie made no answer but gazed pensively at her own image in
the mirror.
"You're a peach to help me," continued Bernice.
Still Marjorie did not answer, and Bernice thought she had seemed
too grateful.
"I know you don't like sentiment," she said timidly.
Marjorie turned to her quickly.
"Oh, I wasn't thinking about that. I was considering whether
we hadn't better bob your hair."
Bernice collapsed backward upon the bed.
IV
On the following Wednesday evening there was a dinner-dance at the
country club. When the guests strolled in Bernice found her place-card with a
slight feeling of irritation. Though at her right sat G. Reece Stoddard, a most
desirable and distinguished young bachelor, the all-important left held only
Charley Paulson. Charley lacked height, beauty, and social shrewdness, and in
her new enlightenment Bernice decided that his only qualification to be her
partner was that he had never been stuck with her. But this feeling of
irritation left with the last of the soup-plates, and Marjorie's specific
instruction came to her. Swallowing her pride she turned to Charley Paulson and
plunged.
"Do you think I ought to bob my hair, Mr. Charley
Paulson?"
Charley looked up in surprise.
"Why?"
"Because I'm considering it. It's such a sure and easy way of
attracting attention."
Charley smiled pleasantly. He could not know this had been
rehearsed. He replied that he didn't know much about bobbed hair. But Bernice
was there to tell him.
"I want to be a society vampire, you see," she announced
coolly, and went on to inform him that bobbed hair was the necessary prelude.
She added that she wanted to ask his advice, because she had heard he was so
critical about girls.
Charley, who knew as much about the psychology of women as he did
of the mental states of Buddhist contemplatives, felt vaguely flattered.
"So I've decided," she continued, her voice rising
slightly, "that early next week I'm going down to the Sevier Hotel
barber-shop, sit in the first chair, and get my hair bobbed." She faltered
noticing that the people near her had paused in their conversation and were
listening; but after a confused second Marjorie's coaching told, and she
finished her paragraph to the vicinity at large. "Of course I'm charging
admission, but if you'll all come down and encourage me I'll issue passes for
the inside seats."
There was a ripple of appreciative laughter, and under cover of it
G. Reece Stoddard leaned over quickly and said close to her ear: "I'll
take a box right now."
She met his eyes and smiled as if he had said something
surprisingly brilliant.
"Do you believe in bobbed hair?" asked G. Reece in the
same undertone.
"I think it's unmoral," affirmed Bernice gravely.
"But, of course, you've either got to amuse people or feed 'em or shock
'em." Marjorie had culled this from Oscar Wilde. It was greeted with a
ripple of laughter from the men and a series of quick, intent looks from the
girls. And then as though she had said nothing of wit or moment Bernice turned
again to Charley and spoke confidentially in his ear.
"I want to ask you your opinion of several people. I imagine
you're a wonderful judge of character."
Charley thrilled faintly—paid her a subtle compliment by
overturning her water.
Two hours later, while Warren McIntyre was standing passively in
the stag line abstractedly watching the dancers and wondering whither and with
whom Marjorie had disappeared, an unrelated perception began to creep slowly
upon him—a perception that Bernice, cousin to Marjorie, had been cut in on
several times in the past five minutes. He closed his eyes, opened them and
looked again. Several minutes back she had been dancing with a visiting boy, a
matter easily accounted for; a visiting boy would know no better. But now she
was dancing with some one else, and there was Charley Paulson headed for her
with enthusiastic determination in his eye. Funny—Charley seldom danced with
more than three girls an evening.
Warren was distinctly surprised when—the exchange having been
effected—the man relieved proved to be none ether than G. Reece Stoddard
himself. And G. Reece seemed not at all jubilant at being relieved. Next time
Bernice danced near, Warren regarded her intently. Yes, she was pretty,
distinctly pretty; and to-night her face seemed really vivacious. She had that
look that no woman, however histrionically proficient, can successfully
counterfeit—she looked as if she were having a good time. He liked the way she
had her hair arranged, wondered if it was brilliantine that made it glisten so.
And that dress was becoming—a dark red that set off her shadowy eyes and high
coloring. He remembered that he had thought her pretty when she first came to
town, before he had realized that she was dull. Too bad she was dull—dull girls
unbearable—certainly pretty though.
His thoughts zigzagged back to Marjorie. This disappearance would
be like other disappearances. When she reappeared he would demand where she had
been—would be told emphatically that it was none of his business. What a pity
she was so sure of him! She basked in the knowledge that no other girl in town
interested him; she defied him to fall in love with Genevieve or Roberta.
Warren sighed. The way to Marjorie's affections was a labyrinth
indeed. He looked up. Bernice was again dancing with the visiting boy. Half
unconsciously he took a step out from the stag line in her direction, and hesitated.
Then he said to himself that it was charity. He walked toward her—collided
suddenly with G. Reece Stoddard.
"Pardon me," said Warren.
But G. Reece had not stopped to apologize. He had again cut in on
Bernice.
That night at one o'clock Marjorie, with one hand on the
electric-light switch in the hall, turned to take a last look at Bernice's
sparkling eyes.
"So it worked?"
"Oh, Marjorie, yes!" cried Bernice.
"I saw you were having a gay time."
"I did! The only trouble was that about midnight I ran short
of talk. I had to repeat myself—with different men of course. I hope they won't
compare notes."
"Men don't," said Marjorie, yawning, "and it
wouldn't matter if they did—they'd think you were even trickier."
She snapped out the light, and as they started up the stairs
Bernice grasped the banister thankfully. For the first time in her life she had
been danced tired.
"You see," said Marjorie it the top of the stairs,
"one man sees another man cut in and he thinks there must be something
there. Well, we'll fix up some new stuff to-morrow. Good night."
"Good night."
As Bernice took down her hair she passed the evening before her in
review. She had followed instructions exactly. Even when Charley Paulson cut in
for the eighth time she had simulated delight and had apparently been both
interested and flattered. She had not talked about the weather or Eau Claire or
automobiles or her school, but had confined her conversation to me, you, and
us.
But a few minutes before she fell asleep a rebellious thought was
churning drowsily in her brain—after all, it was she who had done it. Marjorie,
to be sure, had given her her conversation, but then Marjorie got much of her
conversation out of things she read. Bernice had bought the red dress, though
she had never valued it highly before Marjorie dug it out of her trunk—and her
own voice had said the words, her own lips had smiled, her own feet had danced.
Marjorie nice girl—vain, though—nice evening—nice boys—like
Warren—Warren—Warren—what's his name—Warren——
She fell asleep.
V
To Bernice the next week was a revelation. With the feeling that
people really enjoyed looking at her and listening to her came the foundation
of self-confidence. Of course there were numerous mistakes at first. She did
not know, for instance, that Draycott Deyo was studying for the ministry; she
was unaware that he had cut in on her because he thought she was a quiet,
reserved girl. Had she known these things she would not have treated him to the
line which began "Hello, Shell Shock!" and continued with the bathtub
story—"It takes a frightful lot of energy to fix my hair in the
summer—there's so much of it—so I always fix it first and powder my face and
put on my hat; then I get into the bathtub, and dress afterward. Don't you
think that's the best plan?"
Though Draycott Deyo was in the throes of difficulties concerning
baptism by immersion and might possibly have seen a connection, it must be
admitted that he did not. He considered feminine bathing an immoral subject,
and gave her some of his ideas on the depravity of modern society.
But to offset that unfortunate occurrence Bernice had several
signal successes to her credit. Little Otis Ormonde pleaded off from a trip
East and elected instead to follow her with a puppylike devotion, to the
amusement of his crowd and to the irritation of G. Reece Stoddard, several of
whose afternoon calls Otis completely ruined by the disgusting tenderness of
the glances he bent on Bernice. He even told her the story of the two-by-four
and the dressing-room to show her how frightfully mistaken he and every one
else had been in their first judgment of her. Bernice laughed off that incident
with a slight sinking sensation.
Of all Bernice's conversation perhaps the best known and most
universally approved was the line about the bobbing of her hair.
"Oh, Bernice, when you goin' to get the hair bobbed?"
"Day after to-morrow maybe," she would reply, laughing.
"Will you come and see me? Because I'm counting on you, you know."
"Will we? You know! But you better hurry up."
Bernice, whose tonsorial intentions were strictly dishonorable,
would laugh again.
"Pretty soon now. You'd be surprised."
But perhaps the most significant symbol of her success was the
gray car of the hypercritical Warren McIntyre, parked daily in front of the
Harvey house. At first the parlor-maid was distinctly startled when he asked
for Bernice instead of Marjorie; after a week of it she told the cook that Miss
Bernice had gotta holda Miss Marjorie's best fella.
And Miss Bernice had. Perhaps it began with Warren's desire to
rouse jealousy in Marjorie; perhaps it was the familiar though unrecognized
strain of Marjorie in Bernice's conversation; perhaps it was both of these and
something of sincere attraction besides. But somehow the collective mind of the
younger set knew within a week that Marjorie's most reliable beau had made an
amazing face-about and was giving an indisputable rush to Marjorie's guest. The
question of the moment was how Marjorie would take it. Warren called Bernice on
the 'phone twice a day, sent her notes, and they were frequently seen together
in his roadster, obviously engrossed in one of those tense, significant
conversations as to whether or not he was sincere.
Marjorie on being twitted only laughed. She said she was mighty glad
that Warren had at last found some one who appreciated him. So the younger set
laughed, too, and guessed that Marjorie didn't care and let it go at that.
One afternoon when there were only three days left of her visit
Bernice was waiting in the hall for Warren, with whom she was going to a bridge
party. She was in rather a blissful mood, and when Marjorie—also bound for the
party—appeared beside her and began casually to adjust her hat in the mirror,
Bernice was utterly unprepared for anything in the nature of a clash. Marjorie
did her work very coldly and succinctly in three sentences.
"You may as well get Warren out of your head," she said
coldly.
"What?" Bernice was utterly astounded.
"You may as well stop making a fool of yourself over Warren
McIntyre. He doesn't care a snap of his fingers about you."
For a tense moment they regarded each other—Marjorie scornful,
aloof; Bernice astounded, half-angry, half-afraid. Then two cars drove up in
front of the house and there was a riotous honking. Both of them gasped
faintly, turned, and side by side hurried out.
All through the bridge party Bernice strove in vain to master a
rising uneasiness. She had offended Marjorie, the sphinx of sphinxes. With the
most wholesome and innocent intentions in the world she had stolen Marjorie's
property. She felt suddenly and horribly guilty. After the bridge game, when
they sat in an informal circle and the conversation became general, the storm
gradually broke. Little Otis Ormonde inadvertently precipitated it.
"When you going back to kindergarten, Otis?" some one
had asked.
"Me? Day Bernice gets her hair bobbed."
"Then your education's over," said Marjorie quickly.
"That's only a bluff of hers. I should think you'd have realized."
"That a fact?" demanded Otis, giving Bernice a
reproachful glance.
Bernice's ears burned as she tried to think up an effectual
come-back. In the face of this direct attack her imagination was paralyzed.
"There's a lot of bluffs in the world," continued
Marjorie quite pleasantly. "I should think you'd be young enough to know
that, Otis."
"Well," said Otis, "maybe so. But gee! With a line
like Bernice's——"
"Really?" yawned Marjorie. "What's her latest bon
mot?"
No one seemed to know. In fact, Bernice, having trifled with her
muse's beau, had said nothing memorable of late.
"Was that really all a line?" asked Roberta curiously.
Bernice hesitated. She felt that wit in some form was demanded of
her, but under her cousin's suddenly frigid eyes she was completely
incapacitated.
"I don't know," she stalled.
"Splush!" said Marjorie. "Admit it!"
Bernice saw that Warren's eyes had left a ukulele he had been
tinkering with and were fixed on her questioningly.
"Oh, I don't know!" she repeated steadily. Her cheeks
were glowing.
"Splush!" remarked Marjorie again.
"Come through, Bernice," urged Otis. "Tell her
where to get off." Bernice looked round again—she seemed unable to get
away from Warren's eyes.
"I like bobbed hair," she said hurriedly, as if he had
asked her a question, "and I intend to bob mine."
"When?" demanded Marjorie.
"Any time."
"No time like the present," suggested Roberta.
Otis jumped to his feet.
"Good stuff!" he cried. "We'll have a summer
bobbing party. Sevier Hotel barber-shop, I think you said."
In an instant all were on their feet. Bernice's heart throbbed
violently.
"What?" she gasped.
Out of the group came Marjorie's voice, very clear and
contemptuous.
"Don't worry—she'll back out!"
"Come on, Bernice!" cried Otis, starting toward the
door.
Four eyes—Warren's and Marjorie's—stared at her, challenged her,
defied her. For another second she wavered wildly.
"All right," she said swiftly "I don't care if I
do."
An eternity of minutes later, riding down-town through the late
afternoon beside Warren, the others following in Roberta's car close behind,
Bernice had all the sensations of Marie Antoinette bound for the guillotine in
a tumbrel. Vaguely she wondered why she did not cry out that it was all a
mistake. It was all she could do to keep from clutching her hair with both
bands to protect it from the suddenly hostile world. Yet she did neither. Even
the thought of her mother was no deterrent now. This was the test supreme of
her sportsmanship; her right to walk unchallenged in the starry heaven of
popular girls.
Warren was moodily silent, and when they came to the hotel he drew
up at the curb and nodded to Bernice to precede him out. Roberta's car emptied
a laughing crowd into the shop, which presented two bold plate-glass windows to
the street.
Bernice stood on the curb and looked at the sign, Sevier
Barber-Shop. It was a guillotine indeed, and the hangman was the first barber,
who, attired in a white coat and smoking a cigarette, leaned nonchalantly
against the first chair. He must have heard of her; he must have been waiting
all week, smoking eternal cigarettes beside that portentous,
too-often-mentioned first chair. Would they blind-fold her? No, but they would
tie a white cloth round her neck lest any of her blood—nonsense—hair—should get
on her clothes.
"All right, Bernice," said Warren quickly.
With her chin in the air she crossed the sidewalk, pushed open the
swinging screen-door, and giving not a glance to the uproarious, riotous row
that occupied the waiting bench, went up to the fat barber.
"I want you to bob my hair."
The first barber's mouth slid somewhat open. His cigarette dropped
to the floor.
"Huh?"
"My hair—bob it!"
Refusing further preliminaries, Bernice took her seat on high. A
man in the chair next to her turned on his side and gave her a glance, half
lather, half amazement. One barber started and spoiled little Willy Schuneman's
monthly haircut. Mr. O'Reilly in the last chair grunted and swore musically in
ancient Gaelic as a razor bit into his cheek. Two bootblacks became wide-eyed
and rushed for her feet. No, Bernice didn't care for a shine.
Outside a passer-by stopped and stared; a couple joined him; half
a dozen small boys' nose sprang into life, flattened against the glass; and
snatches of conversation borne on the summer breeze drifted in through the
screen-door.
"Lookada long hair on a kid!"
"Where'd yuh get 'at stuff? 'At's a bearded lady he just
finished shavin'."
But Bernice saw nothing, heard nothing. Her only living sense told
her that this man in the white coat had removed one tortoise-shell comb and
then another; that his fingers were fumbling clumsily with unfamiliar hairpins;
that this hair, this wonderful hair of hers, was going—she would never again
feel its long voluptuous pull as it hung in a dark-brown glory down her back.
For a second she was near breaking down, and then the picture before her swam
mechanically into her vision—Marjorie's mouth curling in a faint ironic smile
as if to say:
"Give up and get down! You tried to buck me and I called your
bluff. You see you haven't got a prayer."
And some last energy rose up in Bernice, for she clinched her
hands under the white cloth, and there was a curious narrowing of her eyes that
Marjorie remarked on to some one long afterward.
Twenty minutes later the barber swung her round to face the
mirror, and she flinched at the full extent of the damage that had been
wrought. Her hair was not curls and now it lay in lank lifeless blocks on both
sides of her suddenly pale face. It was ugly as sin—she had known it would be
ugly as sin. Her face's chief charm had been a Madonna-like simplicity. Now
that was gone and she was—well frightfully mediocre—not stagy; only ridiculous,
like a Greenwich Villager who had left her spectacles at home.
As she climbed down from the chair she tried to smile—failed
miserably. She saw two of the girls exchange glances; noticed Marjorie's mouth
curved in attenuated mockery—and that Warren's eyes were suddenly very cold.
"You see,"—her words fell into an awkward
pause—"I've done it."
"Yes, you've—done it," admitted Warren.
"Do you like it?"
There was a half-hearted "Sure" from two or three
voices, another awkward pause, and then Marjorie turned swiftly and with
serpentlike intensity to Warren.
"Would you mind running me down to the cleaners?" she
asked. "I've simply got to get a dress there before supper. Roberta's
driving right home and she can take the others."
Warren stared abstractedly at some infinite speck out the window.
Then for an instant his eyes rested coldly on Bernice before they turned to
Marjorie.
"Be glad to," he said slowly.
VI
Bernice did not fully realize the outrageous trap that had been
set for her until she met her aunt's amazed glance just before dinner.
"Why Bernice!"
"I've bobbed it, Aunt Josephine."
"Why, child!"
"Do you like it?"
"Why Bernice!"
"I suppose I've shocked you."
"No, but what'll Mrs. Deyo think tomorrow night? Bernice, you
should have waited until after the Deyo's dance—you should have waited if you
wanted to do that."
"It was sudden, Aunt Josephine. Anyway, why does it matter to
Mrs. Deyo particularly?"
"Why child," cried Mrs. Harvey, "in her paper on
'The Foibles of the Younger Generation' that she read at the last meeting of
the Thursday Club she devoted fifteen minutes to bobbed hair. It's her pet
abomination. And the dance is for you and Marjorie!"
"I'm sorry."
"Oh, Bernice, what'll your mother say? She'll think I let you
do it."
"I'm sorry."
Dinner was an agony. She had made a hasty attempt with a
curling-iron, and burned her finger and much hair. She could see that her aunt
was both worried and grieved, and her uncle kept saying, "Well, I'll be
darned!" over and over in a hurt and faintly hostile torte. And Marjorie
sat very quietly, intrenched behind a faint smile, a faintly mocking smile.
Somehow she got through the evening. Three boy's called; Marjorie
disappeared with one of them, and Bernice made a listless unsuccessful attempt
to entertain the two others—sighed thankfully as she climbed the stairs to her
room at half past ten. What a day!
When she had undressed for the night the door opened and Marjorie
came in.
"Bernice," she said "I'm awfully sorry about the
Deyo dance. I'll give you my word of honor I'd forgotten all about it."
"'Sall right," said Bernice shortly. Standing before the
mirror she passed her comb slowly through her short hair.
"I'll take you down-town to-morrow," continued Marjorie,
"and the hairdresser'll fix it so you'll look slick. I didn't imagine
you'd go through with it. I'm really mighty sorry."
"Oh, 'sall right!"
"Still it's your last night, so I suppose it won't matter much."
Then Bernice winced as Marjorie tossed her own hair over her
shoulders and began to twist it slowly into two long blond braids until in her
cream-colored negligée she looked like a delicate painting of some Saxon
princess. Fascinated, Bernice watched the braids grow. Heavy and luxurious they
were moving under the supple fingers like restive snakes—and to Bernice
remained this relic and the curling-iron and a to-morrow full of eyes. She
could see G. Reece Stoddard, who liked her, assuming his Harvard manner and
telling his dinner partner that Bernice shouldn't have been allowed to go to
the movies so much; she could see Draycott Deyo exchanging glances with his
mother and then being conscientiously charitable to her. But then perhaps by
to-morrow Mrs. Deyo would have heard the news; would send round an icy little
note requesting that she fail to appear—and behind her back they would all
laugh and know that Marjorie had made a fool of her; that her chance at beauty
had been sacrificed to the jealous whim of a selfish girl. She sat down
suddenly before the mirror, biting the inside of her cheek.
"I like it," she said with an effort. "I think
it'll be becoming."
Marjorie smiled.
"It looks all right. For heaven's sake, don't let it worry
you!"
"I won't."
"Good night Bernice."
But as the door closed something snapped within Bernice. She
sprang dynamically to her feet, clinching her hands, then swiftly and noiseless
crossed over to her bed and from underneath it dragged out her suitcase. Into
it she tossed toilet articles and a change of clothing, Then she turned to her
trunk and quickly dumped in two drawerfulls of lingerie and stammer dresses.
She moved quietly, but deadly efficiency, and in three-quarters of an hour her
trunk was locked and strapped and she was fully dressed in a becoming new
travelling suit that Marjorie had helped her pick out.
Sitting down at her desk she wrote a short note to Mrs. Harvey, in
which she briefly outlined her reasons for going. She sealed it, addressed it,
and laid it on her pillow. She glanced at her watch. The train left at one, and
she knew that if she walked down to the Marborough Hotel two blocks away she
could easily get a taxicab.
Suddenly she drew in her breath sharply and an expression flashed
into her eyes that a practiced character reader might have connected vaguely
with the set look she had worn in the barber's chair—somehow a development of
it. It was quite a new look for Bernice—and it carried consequences.
She went stealthily to the bureau, picked up an article that lay
there, and turning out all the lights stood quietly until her eyes became
accustomed to the darkness. Softly she pushed open the door to Marjorie's room.
She heard the quiet, even breathing of an untroubled conscience asleep.
She was by the bedside now, very deliberate and calm. She acted
swiftly. Bending over she found one of the braids of Marjorie's hair, followed
it up with her hand to the point nearest the head, and then holding it a little
slack so that the sleeper would feel no pull, she reached down with the shears
and severed it. With the pigtail in her hand she held her breath. Marjorie had
muttered something in her sleep. Bernice deftly amputated the other braid,
paused for an instant, and then flitted swiftly and silently back to her own room.
Down-stairs she opened the big front door, closed it carefully
behind her, and feeling oddly happy and exuberant stepped off the porch into
the moonlight, swinging her heavy grip like a shopping-bag. After a minute's
brisk walk she discovered that her left hand still held the two blond braids.
She laughed unexpectedly—had to shut her mouth hard to keep from emitting an
absolute peal. She was passing Warren's house now, and on the impulse she set
down her baggage, and swinging the braids like piece of rope flung them at the
wooden porch, where they landed with a slight thud. She laughed again, no
longer restraining herself.
"Huh," she giggled wildly. "Scalp the selfish
thing!"
Then picking up her staircase she set off at a half-run down the
moonlit street.
The Baltimore Station
was hot and crowded, so Lois was forced to stand by the telegraph desk for
interminable, sticky seconds while a clerk with big front teeth counted and
recounted a large lady's day message, to determine whether it contained the
innocuous forty-nine words or the fatal fifty-one.
Lois, waiting, decided she wasn't quite sure of the address, so
she took the letter out of her bag and ran over it again.
"Darling," it began—"I understand and
I'm happier than life ever meant me to be. If I could give you the things
you've always been in tune with—but I can't Lois; we can't marry and we can't
lose each other and let all this glorious love end in nothing.
"Until your letter came, dear, I'd been sitting here in the
half dark and thinking where I could go and ever forget you; abroad, perhaps,
to drift through Italy or Spain and dream away the pain of having lost you
where the crumbling ruins of older, mellower civilizations would mirror only
the desolation of my heart—and then your letter came.
"Sweetest, bravest girl, if you'll wire me I'll meet you in
Wilmington—till then I'll be here just waiting and hoping for every long dream
of you to come true.
"Howard."
She had read the letter so many times that she knew it word by
word, yet it still startled her. In it she found many faint reflections of the
man who wrote it—the mingled sweetness and sadness in his dark eyes, the
furtive, restless excitement she felt sometimes when he talked to her, his
dreamy sensuousness that lulled her mind to sleep. Lois was nineteen and very
romantic and curious and courageous.
The large lady and the clerk having compromised on fifty words,
Lois took a blank and wrote her telegram. And there were no overtones to the
finality of her decision.
It's just destiny—she thought—it's just the way things work out in
this damn world. If cowardice is all that's been holding me back there won't be
any more holding back. So we'll just let things take their course and never be
sorry.
The clerk scanned her telegram:
"Arrived Baltimore today spend day with my brother meet me
Wilmington three P.M. Wednesday Love
"Lois."
"Fifty-four cents," said the clerk admiringly.
And never be sorry—thought Lois—and never be sorry——
II
Trees filtering light onto dapple grass. Trees like tall, languid
ladies with feather fans coquetting airily with the ugly roof of the monastery.
Trees like butlers, bending courteously over placid walks and paths. Trees,
trees over the hills on either side and scattering out in clumps and lines and
woods all through eastern Maryland, delicate lace on the hems of many yellow
fields, dark opaque backgrounds for flowered bushes or wild climbing garden.
Some of the trees were very gay and young, but the monastery trees
were older than the monastery which, by true monastic standards, wasn't very
old at all. And, as a matter of fact, it wasn't technically called a monastery,
but only a seminary; nevertheless it shall be a monastery here despite its
Victorian architecture or its Edward VII additions, or even its Woodrow Wilsonian,
patented, last-a-century roofing.
Out behind was the farm where half a dozen lay brothers were
sweating lustily as they moved with deadly efficiency around the
vegetable-gardens. To the left, behind a row of elms, was an informal baseball
diamond where three novices were being batted out by a fourth, amid great
chasings and puffings and blowings. And in front as a great mellow bell boomed
the half-hour a swarm of black, human leaves were blown over the checker-board
of paths under the courteous trees.
Some of these black leaves were very old with cheeks furrowed like
the first ripples of a splashed pool. Then there was a scattering of
middle-aged leaves whose forms when viewed in profile in their revealing gowns
were beginning to be faintly unsymmetrical. These carried thick volumes of
Thomas Aquinas and Henry James and Cardinal Mercier and Immanuel Kant and many
bulging note-books filled with lecture data.
But most numerous were the young leaves; blond boys of nineteen
with very stern, conscientious expressions; men in the late twenties with a
keen self-assurance from having taught out in the world for five years—several
hundreds of them, from city and town and country in Maryland and Pennsylvania
and Virginia and West Virginia and Delaware.
There were many Americans and some Irish and some tough Irish and
a few French, and several Italians and Poles, and they walked informally arm in
arm with each other in twos and threes or in long rows, almost universally
distinguished by the straight mouth and the considerable chin—for this was the
Society of Jesus, founded in Spain five hundred years before by a tough-minded
soldier who trained men to hold a breach or a salon, preach a sermon or write a
treaty, and do it and not argue . . .
Lois got out of a bus into the sunshine down by the outer gate.
She was nineteen with yellow hair and eyes that people were tactful enough not
to call green. When men of talent saw her in a street-car they often furtively
produced little stub-pencils and backs of envelopes and tried to sum up that
profile or the thing that the eyebrows did to her eyes. Later they looked at
their results and usually tore them up with wondering sighs.
Though Lois was very jauntily attired in an expensively
appropriate travelling affair, she did not linger to pat out the dust which
covered her clothes, but started up the central walk with curious glances at
either side. Her face was very eager and expectant, yet she hadn't at all that
glorified expression that girls wear when they arrive for a Senior Prom at
Princeton or New Haven; still, as there were no senior proms here, perhaps it
didn't matter.
She was wondering what he would look like, whether she'd possibly
know him from his picture. In the picture, which hung over her mother's bureau
at home, he seemed very young and hollow-cheeked and rather pitiful, with only
a well-developed mouth and all ill-fitting probationer's gown to show that he
had already made a momentous decision about his life. Of course he had been
only nineteen then and now he was thirty-six—didn't look like that at all; in
recent snap-shots he was much broader and his hair had grown a little thin—but
the impression of her brother she had always retained was that of the big
picture. And so she had always been a little sorry for him. What a life for a
man! Seventeen years of preparation and he wasn't even a priest yet—wouldn't be
for another year.
Lois had an idea that this was all going to be rather solemn if
she let it be. But she was going to give her very best imitation of undiluted
sunshine, the imitation she could give even when her head was splitting or when
her mother had a nervous breakdown or when she was particularly romantic and
curious and courageous. This brother of hers undoubtedly needed cheering up,
and he was going to be cheered up, whether he liked it or not.
As she drew near the great, homely front door she saw a man break
suddenly away from a group and, pulling up the skirts of his gown, run toward
her. He was smiling, she noticed, and he looked very big and—and reliable. She
stopped and waited, knew that her heart was beating unusually fast.
"Lois!" he cried, and in a second she was in his arms.
She was suddenly trembling.
"Lois!" he cried again, "why, this is wonderful! I
can't tell you, Lois, how much I've looked forward to this.
Why, Lois, you're beautiful!"
Lois gasped.
His voice, though restrained, was vibrant with energy and that odd
sort of enveloping personality she had thought that she only of the family
possessed.
"I'm mighty glad, too—Kieth."
She flushed, but not unhappily, at this first use of his name.
"Lois—Lois—Lois," he repeated in wonder. "Child, we'll
go in here a minute, because I want you to meet the rector, and then we'll walk
around. I have a thousand things to talk to you about."
His voice became graver. "How's mother?"
She looked at him for a moment and then said something that she
had not intended to say at all, the very sort of thing she had resolved to
avoid.
"Oh, Kieth—she's—she's getting worse all the time, every
way."
He nodded slowly as if he understood.
"Nervous, well—you can tell me about that later. Now——"
She was in a small study with a large desk, saying something to a
little, jovial, white-haired priest who retained her hand for some seconds.
"So this is Lois!"
He said it as if he had heard of her for years.
He entreated her to sit down.
Two other priests arrived enthusiastically and shook hands with
her and addressed her as "Kieth's little sister," which she found she
didn't mind a bit.
How assured they seemed; she had expected a certain shyness,
reserve at least. There were several jokes unintelligible to her, which seemed
to delight every one, and the little Father Rector referred to the trio of them
as "dim old monks," which she appreciated, because of course they
weren't monks at all. She had a lightning impression that they were especially
fond of Kieth—the Father Rector had called him "Kieth" and one of the
others had kept a hand on his shoulder all through the conversation. Then she
was shaking hands again and promising to come back a little later for some
ice-cream, and smiling and smiling and being rather absurdly happy . . . she
told herself that it was because Kieth was so delighted in showing her off.
Then she and Kieth were strolling along a path, arm in arm, and he
was informing her what an absolute jewel the Father Rector was.
"Lois," he broke off suddenly, "I want to tell you
before we go any farther how much it means to me to have you come up here. I
think it was—mighty sweet of you. I know what a gay time you've been
having."
Lois gasped. She was not prepared for this. At first when she had
conceived the plan of taking the hot journey down to Baltimore staying the
night with a friend and then coming out to see her brother, she had felt rather
consciously virtuous, hoped he wouldn't be priggish or resentful about her not
having come before—but walking here with him under the trees seemed such a
little thing, and surprisingly a happy thing.
"Why, Kieth," she said quickly, "you know I
couldn't have waited a day longer. I saw you when I was five, but of course I
didn't remember, and how could I have gone on without practically ever having
seen my only brother?"
"It was mighty sweet of you, Lois," he repeated.
Lois blushed—he did have personality.
"I want you to tell me all about yourself," he said
after a pause. "Of course I have a general idea what you and mother did in
Europe those fourteen years, and then we were all so worried, Lois, when you
had pneumonia and couldn't come down with mother—let's see that was two years
ago—and then, well, I've seen your name in the papers, but it's all been so
unsatisfactory. I haven't known you, Lois."
She found herself analyzing his personality as she analyzed the
personality of every man she met. She wondered if the effect of—of intimacy
that he gave was bred by his constant repetition of her name. He said it as if
he loved the word, as if it had an inherent meaning to him.
"Then you were at school," he continued.
"Yes, at Farmington. Mother wanted me to go to a convent—but
I didn't want to."
She cast a side glance at him to see if he would resent this.
But he only nodded slowly.
"Had enough convents abroad, eh?"
"Yes—and Kieth, convents are different there anyway. Here
even in the nicest ones there are so many common girls."
He nodded again.
"Yes," he agreed, "I suppose there are, and I know
how you feel about it. It grated on me here, at first, Lois, though I wouldn't
say that to any one but you; we're rather sensitive, you and I, to things like
this."
"You mean the men here?"
"Yes, some of them of course were fine, the sort of men I'd
always been thrown with, but there were others; a man named Regan, for
instance—I hated the fellow, and now he's about the best friend I have. A
wonderful character, Lois; you'll meet him later. Sort of man you'd like to
have with you in a fight."
Lois was thinking that Kieth was the sort of man she'd like to
have with her in a fight.
"How did you—how did you first happen to do it?" she
asked, rather shyly, "to come here, I mean. Of course mother told me the
story about the Pullman car."
"Oh, that——" He looked rather annoyed.
"Tell me that. I'd like to hear you tell it."
"Oh, it's nothing except what you probably know. It was
evening and I'd been riding all day and thinking about—about a hundred things,
Lois, and then suddenly I had a sense that some one was sitting across from me,
felt that he'd been there for some time, and had a vague idea that he was
another traveller. All at once he leaned over toward me and I heard a voice
say: 'I want you to be a priest, that's what I want.' Well I jumped up and
cried out, 'Oh, my God, not that!'—made an idiot of myself before about twenty
people; you see there wasn't any one sitting there at all. A week after that I
went to the Jesuit College in Philadelphia and crawled up the last flight of
stairs to the rector's office on my hands and knees."
There was another silence and Lois saw that her brother's eyes
wore a far-away look, that he was staring unseeingly out over the sunny fields.
She was stirred by the modulations of his voice and the sudden silence that
seemed to flow about him when he finished speaking.
She noticed now that his eyes were of the same fibre as hers, with
the green left out, and that his mouth was much gentler, really, than in the
picture—or was it that the face had grown up to it lately? He was getting a
little bald just on top of his head. She wondered if that was from wearing a
hat so much. It seemed awful for a man to grow bald and no one to care about
it.
"Were you—pious when you were young, Kieth?" she asked.
"You know what I mean. Were you religious? If you don't mind these
personal questions."
"Yes," he said with his eyes still far away—and she felt
that his intense abstraction was as much a part of his personality as his
attention. "Yes, I suppose I was, when I was—sober."
Lois thrilled slightly.
"Did you drink?"
He nodded.
"I was on the way to making a bad hash of things." He
smiled and, turning his gray eyes on her, changed the subject.
"Child, tell me about mother. I know it's been awfully hard
for you there, lately. I know you've had to sacrifice a lot and put up with a
great deal and I want you to know how fine of you I think it is. I feel, Lois,
that you're sort of taking the place of both of us there."
Lois thought quickly how little she had sacrificed; how lately she
had constantly avoided her nervous, half-invalid mother.
"Youth shouldn't be sacrificed to age, Kieth," she said
steadily.
"I know," he sighed, "and you oughtn't to have the
weight on your shoulders, child. I wish I were there to help you."
She saw how quickly he had turned her remark and instantly she
knew what this quality was that he gave off. He was sweet. Her
thoughts went of on a side-track and then she broke the silence with an odd
remark.
"Sweetness is hard," she said suddenly.
"What?"
"Nothing," she denied in confusion. "I didn't mean
to speak aloud. I was thinking of something—of a conversation with a man named
Freddy Kebble."
"Maury Kebble's brother?"
"Yes," she said rather surprised to think of him having
known Maury Kebble. Still there was nothing strange about it. "Well, he
and I were talking about sweetness a few weeks ago. Oh, I don't know—I said
that a man named Howard—that a man I knew was sweet, and he didn't agree with
me, and we began talking about what sweetness in a man was: He kept telling me
I meant a sort of soppy softness, but I knew I didn't—yet I didn't know exactly
how to put it. I see now. I meant just the opposite. I suppose real sweetness
is a sort of hardness—and strength."
Kieth nodded.
"I see what you mean. I've known old priests who had
it."
"I'm talking about young men," she said rather
defiantly.
They had reached the now deserted baseball diamond and, pointing
her to a wooden bench, he sprawled full length on the grass.
"Are these young men happy here,
Kieth?"
"Don't they look happy, Lois?"
"I suppose so, but those young ones, those
two we just passed—have they—are they——?
"Are they signed up?" he laughed. "No, but they
will be next month."
"Permanently?"
"Yes—unless they break down mentally or physically. Of course
in a discipline like ours a lot drop out."
"But those boys. Are they giving up fine chances
outside—like you did?"
He nodded.
"Some of them."
"But Kieth, they don't know what they're doing. They haven't
had any experience of what they're missing."
"No, I suppose not."
"It doesn't seem fair. Life has just sort of scared them at
first. Do they all come in so young?"
"No, some of them have knocked around, led pretty wild
lives—Regan, for instance."
"I should think that sort would be better," she said
meditatively, "men that had seen life."
"No," said Kieth earnestly, "I'm not sure that
knocking about gives a man the sort of experience he can communicate to others.
Some of the broadest men I've known have been absolutely rigid about
themselves. And reformed libertines are a notoriously intolerant class. Don't
you thank so, Lois?"
She nodded, still meditative, and he continued:
"It seems to me that when one weak reason goes to another, it
isn't help they want; it's a sort of companionship in guilt, Lois. After you
were born, when mother began to get nervous she used to go and weep with a
certain Mrs. Comstock. Lord, it used to make me shiver. She said it comforted
her, poor old mother. No, I don't think that to help others you've got to show
yourself at all. Real help comes from a stronger person whom you respect. And
their sympathy is all the bigger because it's impersonal."
"But people want human sympathy," objected Lois.
"They want to feel the other person's been tempted."
"Lois, in their hearts they want to feel that the other
person's been weak. That's what they mean by human.
"Here in this old monkery, Lois," he continued with a
smile, "they try to get all that self-pity and pride in our own wills out
of us right at the first. They put us to scrubbing floors—and other things.
It's like that idea of saving your life by losing it. You see we sort of feel
that the less human a man is, in your sense of human, the better servant he can
be to humanity. We carry it out to the end, too. When one of us dies his family
can't even have him then. He's buried here under plain wooden cross with a
thousand others."
His tone changed suddenly and he looked at her with a great
brightness in his gray eyes.
"But way back in a man's heart there are some things he can't
get rid of—an one of them is that I'm awfully in love with my little
sister."
With a sudden impulse she knelt beside him in the grass and,
Leaning over, kissed his forehead.
"You're hard, Kieth," she said, "and I love you for
it—and you're sweet."
III
Back in the reception-room Lois met a half-dozen more of Kieth's
particular friends; there was a young man named Jarvis, rather pale and
delicate-looking, who, she knew, must be a grandson of old Mrs. Jarvis at home,
and she mentally compared this ascetic with a brace of his riotous uncles.
And there was Regan with a scarred face and piercing intent eyes
that followed her about the room and often rested on Kieth with something very
like worship. She knew then what Kieth had meant about "a good man to have
with you in a fight."
He's the missionary type—she thought vaguely—China or something.
"I want Kieth's sister to show us what the shimmy is,"
demanded one young man with a broad grin.
Lois laughed.
"I'm afraid the Father Rector would send me shimmying out the
gate. Besides, I'm not an expert."
"I'm sure it wouldn't be best for Jimmy's soul anyway,"
said Kieth solemnly. "He's inclined to brood about things like shimmys.
They were just starting to do the—maxixe, wasn't it, Jimmy?—when he became a
monk, and it haunted him his whole first year. You'd see him when he was
peeling potatoes, putting his arm around the bucket and making irreligious motions
with his feet."
There was a general laugh in which Lois joined.
"An old lady who comes here to Mass sent Kieth this
ice-cream," whispered Jarvis under cover of the laugh, "because she'd
heard you were coming. It's pretty good, isn't it?"
There were tears trembling in Lois' eyes.
IV
Then half an hour later over in the chapel things suddenly went
all wrong. It was several years since Lois had been at Benediction and at first
she was thrilled by the gleaming monstrance with its central spot of white, the
air rich and heavy with incense, and the sun shining through the stained-glass
window of St. Francis Xavier overhead and falling in warm red tracery on the
cassock of the man in front of her, but at the first notes of the "O
salutaris hostia" a heavy weight seemed to descend upon her soul.
Kieth was on her right and young Jarvis on her left, and she stole uneasy
glance at both of them.
What's the matter with me? she thought impatiently.
She looked again. Was there a certain coldness in both their
profiles, that she had not noticed before—a pallor about the mouth and a
curious set expression in their eyes? She shivered slightly: they were like
dead men.
She felt her soul recede suddenly from Kieth's. This was her
brother—this, this unnatural person. She caught herself in the act of a little
laugh.
"What is the matter with me?"
She passed her hand over her eyes and the weight increased. The
incense sickened her and a stray, ragged note from one of the tenors in the
choir grated on her ear like the shriek of a slate-pencil. She fidgeted, and
raising her hand to her hair touched her forehead, found moisture on it.
"It's hot in here, hot as the deuce."
Again she repressed a faint laugh and, then in an instant the
weight on her heart suddenly diffused into cold fear. . . . It was that candle
on the altar. It was all wrong—wrong. Why didn't somebody see it? There was
something in it. There was something coming out of it, taking
form and shape above it.
She tried to fight down her rising panic, told herself it was the
wick. If the wick wasn't straight, candles did something—but they didn't do
this! With incalculable rapidity a force was gathering within her, a
tremendous, assimilative force, drawing from every sense, every corner of her
brain, and as it surged up inside her she felt an enormous terrified repulsion.
She drew her arms in close to her side away from Kieth and Jarvis.
Something in that candle . . . she was leaning forward—in another
moment she felt she would go forward toward it—didn't any one see it? . . .
anyone?
"Ugh!"
She felt a space beside her and something told her that Jarvis had
gasped and sat down very suddenly . . . then she was kneeling and as the
flaming monstrance slowly left the altar in the hands of the priest, she heard
a great rushing noise in her ears—the crash of the bells was like hammer-blows
. . . and then in a moment that seemed eternal a great torrent rolled over her
heart—there was a shouting there and a lashing as of waves . . .
. . . She was calling, felt herself calling for Kieth, her lips
mouthing the words that would not come:
"Kieth! Oh, my God! Kieth!"
Suddenly she became aware of a new presence, something external, in
front of her, consummated and expressed in warm red tracery. Then she knew. It
was the window of St. Francis Xavier. Her mind gripped at it, clung to it
finally, and she felt herself calling again endlessly, impotently—Kieth—Kieth!
Then out of a great stillness came a voice:
"Blessed be God."
With a gradual rumble sounded the response rolling heavily through
the chapel:
"Blessed be God."
The words sang instantly in her heart; the incense lay mystically
and sweetly peaceful upon the air, and the candle on the altar went out.
"Blessed be His Holy Name."
"Blessed be His Holy Name."
Everything blurred into a swinging mist. With a sound half-gasp,
half-cry she rocked on her feet and reeled backward into Kieth's suddenly
outstretched arms.
V
"Lie still, child."
She closed her eyes again. She was on the grass outside, pillowed
on Kieth's arm, and Regan was dabbing her head with a cold towel.
"I'm all right," she said quietly.
"I know, but just lie still a minute longer. It was too hot
in there. Jarvis felt it, too."
She laughed as Regan again touched her gingerly with the towel.
"I'm all right," she repeated.
But though a warm peace was falling her mind and heart she felt
oddly broken and chastened, as if some one had held her stripped soul up and
laughed.
VI
Half an hour later she walked leaning on Kieth's arm down the long
central path toward the gate.
"It's been such a short afternoon," he sighed, "and
I'm so sorry you were sick, Lois."
"Kieth, I'm feeling fine now, really; I wish you wouldn't
worry."
"Poor old child. I didn't realize that Benediction'd be a
long service for you after your hot trip out here and all."
She laughed cheerfully.
"I guess the truth is I'm not much used to Benediction. Mass
is the limit of my religious exertions."
She paused and then continued quickly:
"I don't want to shock you, Kieth, but I can't tell you
how—how inconvenient being a Catholic is. It really doesn't
seem to apply any more. As far as morals go, some of the wildest boys I know
are Catholics. And the brightest boys—I mean the ones who think and read a lot,
don't seem to believe in much of anything any more."
"Tell me about it. The bus won't be here for another
half-hour."
They sat down on a bench by the path.
"For instance, Gerald Carter, he's published a novel. He
absolutely roars when people mention immortality. And then Howa—well, another
man I've known well, lately, who was Phi Beta Kappa at Harvard says that no
intelligent person can believe in Supernatural Christianity. He says Christ was
a great socialist, though. Am I shocking you?"
She broke off suddenly.
Kieth smiled.
"You can't shock a monk. He's a professional
shock-absorber."
"Well," she continued, "that's about all. It seems
so—so narrow. Church schools, for instance. There's more freedom
about things that Catholic people can't see—like birth control."
Kieth winced, almost imperceptibly, but Lois saw it.
"Oh," she said quickly, "everybody talks about
everything now."
"It's probably better that way."
"Oh, yes, much better. Well, that's all, Kieth. I just wanted
to tell you why I'm a little—luke-warm, at present."
"I'm not shocked, Lois. I understand better than you think.
We all go through those times. But I know it'll come out all right, child.
There's that gift of faith that we have, you and I, that'll carry us past the
bad spots."
He rose as he spoke and they started again down the path.
"I want you to pray for me sometimes, Lois. I think your
prayers would be about what I need. Because we've come very close in these few
hours, I think."
Her eyes were suddenly shining.
"Oh we have, we have!" she cried. "I feel closer to
you now than to any one in the world."
He stopped suddenly and indicated the side of the path.
"We might—just a minute——"
It was a pietà, a life-size statue of the Blessed Virgin set within
a semicircle of rocks.
Feeling a little self-conscious she dropped on her knees beside
him and made an unsuccessful attempt at prayer.
She was only half through when he rose. He took her arm again.
"I wanted to thank Her for letting as have this day
together," he said simply.
Lois felt a sudden lump in her throat and she wanted to say
something that would tell him how much it had meant to her, too. But she found
no words.
"I'll always remember this," he continued, his voice
trembling a little——"this summer day with you. It's been just what I
expected. You're just what I expected, Lois."
"I'm awfully glad, Keith."
"You see, when you were little they kept sending me
snap-shots of you, first as a baby and then as a child in socks playing on the
beach with a pail and shovel, and then suddenly as a wistful little girl with
wondering, pure eyes—and I used to build dreams about you. A man has to have
something living to cling to. I think, Lois, it was your little white soul I
tried to keep near me—even when life was at its loudest and every intellectual
idea of God seemed the sheerest mockery, and desire and love and a million
things came up to me and said: 'Look here at me! See, I'm Life. You're turning
your back on it!' All the way through that shadow, Lois, I could always see
your baby soul flitting on ahead of me, very frail and clear and
wonderful."
Lois was crying softly. They had reached the gate and she rested
her elbow on it and dabbed furiously at her eyes.
"And then later, child, when you were sick I knelt all one
night and asked God to spare you for me—for I knew then that I wanted more; He
had taught me to want more. I wanted to know you moved and breathed in the same
world with me. I saw you growing up, that white innocence of yours changing to
a flame and burning to give light to other weaker souls. And then I wanted some
day to take your children on my knee and hear them call the crabbed old monk
Uncle Kieth."
He seemed to be laughing now as he talked.
"Oh, Lois, Lois, I was asking God for more then. I wanted the
letters you'd write me and the place I'd have at your table. I wanted an awful
lot, Lois, dear."
"You've got me, Kieth," she sobbed "you know it,
say you know it. Oh, I'm acting like a baby but I didn't think you'd be this
way, and I—oh, Kieth—Kieth——"
He took her hand and patted it softly.
"Here's the bus. You'll come again won't you?"
She put her hands on his cheeks, add drawing his head down,
pressed her tear-wet face against his.
"Oh, Kieth, brother, some day I'll tell you something."
He helped her in, saw her take down her handkerchief and smile
bravely at him, as the driver kicked his whip and the bus rolled off. Then a
thick cloud of dust rose around it and she was gone.
For a few minutes he stood there on the road his hand on the
gate-post, his lips half parted in a smile.
"Lois," he said aloud in a sort of wonder, "Lois,
Lois."
Later, some probationers passing noticed him kneeling before the
pietà, and coming back after a time found him still there. And he was there
until twilight came down and the courteous trees grew garrulous overhead and
the crickets took up their burden of song in the dusky grass.
VII
The first clerk in the telegraph booth in the Baltimore Station
whistled through his buck teeth at the second clerk:
"S'matter?"
"See that girl—no, the pretty one with the big black dots on
her veil. Too late—she's gone. You missed somep'n."
"What about her?"
"Nothing. 'Cept she's damn good-looking. Came in here
yesterday and sent a wire to some guy to meet her somewhere. Then a minute ago
she came in with a telegram all written out and was standin' there goin' to
give it to me when she changed her mind or somep'n and all of a sudden tore it
up."
"Hm."
The first clerk came around tile counter and picking up the two
pieces of paper from the floor put them together idly. The second clerk read
them over his shoulder and subconsciously counted the words as he read. There
were just thirteen.
"This is in the way of a permanent goodbye. I should suggest
Italy.
"Lois."
"Tore it up, eh?" said the second clerk.
In the millennium an
educational genius will write a book to be given to every young man on the date
of his disillusion. This work will have the flavor of Montaigne's essays and
Samuel Butler's note-books—and a little of Tolstoi and Marcus Aurelius. It will
be neither cheerful nor pleasant but will contain numerous passages of striking
humor. Since first-class minds never believe anything very strongly until
they've experienced it, its value will be purely relative . . . all people over
thirty will refer to it as "depressing."
This prelude belongs to the story of a young man who lived, as you
and I do, before the book.
II
The generation which numbered Bryan Dalyrimple drifted out of
adolescence to a mighty fan-fare of trumpets. Bryan played the star in an
affair which included a Lewis gun and a nine-day romp behind the retreating
German lines, so luck triumphant or sentiment rampant awarded him a row of
medals and on his arrival in the States he was told that he was second in
importance only to General Pershing and Sergeant York. This was a lot of fun.
The governor of his State, a stray congressman, and a citizens' committee gave
him enormous smiles and "By God, Sirs" on the dock at Hoboken; there
were newspaper reporters and photographers who said "would you mind"
and "if you could just"; and back in his home town there were old
ladies, the rims of whose eyes grew red as they talked to him, and girls who
hadn't remembered him so well since his father's business went blah! in
nineteen-twelve.
But when the shouting died he realized that for a month he had
been the house guest of the mayor, that he had only fourteen dollars in the
world and that "the name that will live forever in the annals and legends
of this State" was already living there very quietly and obscurely.
One morning he lay late in bed and just outside his door he heard
the up-stairs maid talking to the cook. The up-stairs maid said that Mrs.
Hawkins, the mayor's wife, had been trying for a week to hint Dalyrimple out of
the house. He left at eleven o'clock in intolerable confusion, asking that his
trunk be sent to Mrs. Beebe's boarding-house.
Dalyrimple was twenty-three and he had never worked. His father
had given him two years at the State University and passed away about the time
of his son's nine-day romp, leaving behind him some mid-Victorian furniture and
a thin packet of folded paper that turned out to be grocery bills. Young
Dalyrimple had very keen gray eyes, a mind that delighted the army
psychological examiners, a trick of having read it—whatever it was—some time
before, and a cool hand in a hot situation. But these things did not save him a
final, unresigned sigh when he realized that he had to go to work—right away.
It was early afternoon when he walked into the office of Theron G.
Macy, who owned the largest wholesale grocery house in town. Plump, prosperous,
wearing a pleasant but quite unhumorous smile, Theron G. Macy greeted him
warmly.
"Well—how do, Bryan? What's on your mind?"
To Dalyrimple, straining with his admission, his own words, when
they came, sounded like an Arab beggar's whine for alms.
"Why—this question of a job." ("This question of a
job" seemed somehow more clothed than just "a job.")
"A job?" An almost imperceptible breeze blew across Mr.
Macy's expression.
"You see, Mr. Macy," continued Dalyrimple, "I feel
I'm wasting time. I want to get started at something. I had several chances about
a month ago but they all seem to have—gone——"
"Let's see," interrupted Mr. Macy. "What were
they?"
"Well, just at the first the governor said something about a
vacancy on his staff. I was sort of counting on that for a while, but I hear
he's given it to Allen Gregg, you know, son of G. P. Gregg. He sort of forgot
what he said to me—just talking, I guess."
"You ought to push those things."
"Then there was that engineering expedition, but they decided
they'd have to have a man who knew hydraulics, so they couldn't use me unless I
paid my own way."
"You had just a year at the university?"
"Two. But I didn't take any science or mathematics. Well, the
day the battalion paraded, Mr. Peter Jordan said something about a vacancy in
his store. I went around there to-day and I found he meant a sort of
floor-walker—and then you said something one day"—he paused and waited for
the older man to take him up, but noting only a minute wince
continued—"about a position, so I thought I'd come and see you."
"There was a position," confessed Mr. Macy reluctantly,
"but since then we've filled it." He cleared his throat again.
"You've waited quite a while."
"Yes, I suppose I did. Everybody told me there was no
hurry—and I'd had these various offers."
Mr. Macy delivered a paragraph on present-day opportunities which
Dalyrimple's mind completely skipped.
"Have you had any business experience?"
"I worked on a ranch two summers as a rider."
"Oh, well," Mr. Macy disparaged this neatly, and then
continued: "What do you think you're worth?"
"I don't know."
"Well, Bryan, I tell you, I'm willing to strain a point and
give you a chance."
Dalyrimple nodded.
"Your salary won't be much. You'll start by learning the
stock. Then you'll come in the office for a while. Then you'll go on the road.
When could you begin?"
"How about to-morrow?"
"All right. Report to Mr. Hanson in the stock-room. He'll
start you off."
He continued to regard Dalyrimple steadily until the latter,
realizing that the interview was over, rose awkwardly.
"Well, Mr. Macy, I'm certainly much obliged."
"That's all right. Glad to help you, Bryan."
After an irresolute moment, Dalyrimple found himself in the hall.
His forehead was covered with perspiration, and the room had not been hot.
"Why the devil did I thank the son of a gun?" he
muttered.
III
Next morning Mr. Hanson informed him coldly of the necessity of
punching the time-clock at seven every morning, and delivered him for
instruction into the hands of a fellow worker, one Charley Moore.
Charley was twenty-six, with that faint musk of weakness hanging
about him that is often mistaken for the scent of evil. It took no
psychological examiner to decide that he had drifted into indulgence and
laziness as casually as he had drifted into life, and was to drift out. He was
pale and his clothes stank of smoke; he enjoyed burlesque shows, billiards, and
Robert Service, and was always looking back upon his last intrigue or forward
to his next one. In his youth his taste had run to loud ties, but now it seemed
to have faded, like his vitality, and was expressed in pale-lilac four-in-hands
and indeterminate gray collars. Charley was listlessly struggling that losing
struggle against mental, moral, and physical anæmia that takes place
ceaselessly on the lower fringe of the middle classes.
The first morning he stretched himself on a row of cereal cartons
and carefully went over the limitations of the Theron G. Macy Company.
"It's a piker organization. My Gosh! Lookit what they give
me. I'm quittin' in a coupla months. Hell! Me stay with this bunch!"
The Charley Moores are always going to change jobs next month.
They do, once or twice in their careers, after which they sit around comparing
their last job with the present one, to the infinite disparagement of the latter.
"What do you get?" asked Dalyrimple curiously.
"Me? I get sixty." This rather defiantly.
"Did you start at sixty?"
"Me? No, I started at thirty-five. He told me he'd put me on
the road after I learned the stock. That's what he tells 'em all."
"How long've you been here?" asked Dalyrimple with a
sinking sensation.
"Me? Four years. My last year, too, you bet your boots."
Dalyrimple rather resented the presence of the store detective as
he resented the time-clock, and he came into contact with him almost
immediately through the rule against smoking. This rule was a thorn in his
side. He was accustomed to his three or four cigarettes in a morning, and after
three days without it he followed Charley Moore by a circuitous route up a
flight of back stairs to a little balcony where they indulged in peace. But
this was not for long. One day in his second week the detective met him in a
nook of the stairs, on his descent, and told him sternly that next time he'd be
reported to Mr. Macy. Dalyrimple felt like an errant schoolboy.
Unpleasant facts came to his knowledge. There were
"cave-dwellers" in the basement who had worked there for ten or
fifteen years at sixty dollars a month, rolling barrels and carrying boxes
through damp, cement-walled corridors, lost in that echoing half-darkness
between seven and five-thirty and, like himself, compelled several times a
month to work until nine at night.
At the end of a month he stood in line and received forty dollars.
He pawned a cigarette-case and a pair of field-glasses and managed to live—to
eat, sleep, and smoke. It was, however, a narrow scrape; as the ways and means
of economy were a closed book to him and the second month brought no increase,
he voiced his alarm.
"If you've got a drag with old Macy, maybe he'll raise
you," was Charley's disheartening reply. "But he didn't raise me till
I'd been here nearly two years."
"I've got to live," said Dalyrimple simply. "I
could get more pay as a laborer on the railroad but, Golly, I want to feel I'm
where there's a chance to get ahead."
Charles shook his head sceptically and Mr. Macy's answer next day
was equally unsatisfactory.
Dalyrimple had gone to the office just before closing time.
"Mr. Macy, I'd like to speak to you."
"Why—yes." The unhumorous smile appeared. The voice was
faintly resentful.
"I want to speak to you in regard to more salary."
Mr. Macy nodded.
"Well," he said doubtfully, "I don't know exactly
what you're doing. I'll speak to Mr. Hanson."
He knew exactly what Dalyrimple was doing, and Dalyrimple knew he
knew.
"I'm in the stock-room—and, sir, while I'm here I'd like to
ask you how much longer I'll have to stay there."
"Why—I'm not sure exactly. Of course it takes some time to
learn the stock."
"You told me two months when I started."
"Yes. Well, I'll speak to Mr. Hanson."
Dalyrimple paused irresolute.
"Thank you, sir."
Two days later he again appeared in the office with the result of
a count that had been asked for by Mr. Hesse, the bookkeeper. Mr. Hesse was
engaged and Dalyrimple, waiting, began idly fingering in a ledger on the
stenographer's desk.
Half unconsciously he turned a page—he caught sight of his name
—it was a salary list:
|
Dalyrimple |
|
Demming |
|
Donahoe |
|
Everett |
His eyes stopped—
|
Everett.........................$60 |
So Tom Everett, Macy's weak-chinned nephew, had started at sixty
—and in three weeks he had been out of the packing-room and into the office.
So that was it! He was to sit and see man after man pushed over
him: sons, cousins, sons of friends, irrespective of their capabilities,
while he was cast for a pawn, with "going on the
road" dangled before his eyes—put off with the stock remark: "I'll
see; I'll look into it." At forty, perhaps, he would be a bookkeeper like
old Hesse, tired, listless Hesse with a dull routine for his stint and a dull
background of boarding-house conversation.
This was a moment when a genii should have pressed into his hand
the book for disillusioned young men. But the book has not been written.
A great protest swelling into revolt surged up in him. Ideas half
forgotten, chaoticly perceived and assimilated, filled his mind. Get on—that
was the rule of life—and that was all. How he did it, didn't matter—but to be
Hesse or Charley Moore.
"I won't!" he cried aloud.
The bookkeeper and the stenographers looked up in surprise.
"What?"
For a second Dalyrimple stared—then walked up to the desk.
"Here's that data," he said brusquely. "I can't
wait any longer."
Mr. Hesse's face expressed surprise.
It didn't matter what he did—just so he got out of this rut. In a
dream he stepped from the elevator into the stock-room, and walking to an
unused aisle, sat down on a box, covering his face with his hands.
His brain was whirring with the frightful jar of discovering a
platitude for himself.
"I've got to get out of this," he said aloud and then
repeated, "I've got to get out"—and he didn't mean only out of Macy's
wholesale house.
When he left at five-thirty it was pouring rain, but he struck off
in the opposite direction from his boarding-house, feeling, in the first cool
moisture that oozed soggily through his old suit, an odd exultation and
freshness. He wanted a world that was like walking through rain, even though he
could not see far ahead of him, but fate had put him in the world of Mr. Macy's
fetid storerooms and corridors. At first merely the overwhelming need of change
took him, then half-plans began to formulate in his imagination.
"I'll go East—to a big city—meet people—bigger people—people
who'll help me. Interesting work somewhere. My God, there must be."
With sickening truth it occurred to him that his facility for
meeting people was limited. Of all places it was here in his own town that he
should be known, was known—famous—before the water of oblivion had rolled over
him.
You had to cut corners, that was all. Pull—relationship—wealthy
marriages——
For several miles the continued reiteration of this preoccupied
him and then he perceived that the rain had become thicker and more opaque in
the heavy gray of twilight and that the houses were falling away. The district
of full blocks, then of big houses, then of scattering little ones, passed and
great sweeps of misty country opened out on both sides. It was hard walking
here. The sidewalk had given place to a dirt road, streaked with furious brown
rivulets that splashed and squashed around his shoes.
Cutting corners—the words began to fall apart, forming curious
phrasings—little illuminated pieces of themselves. They resolved into
sentences, each of which had a strangely familiar ring.
Cutting corners meant rejecting the old childhood principles that
success came from faithfulness to duty, that evil was necessarily punished or
virtue necessarily rewarded—that honest poverty was happier than corrupt
riches.
It meant being hard.
This phrase appealed to him and he repeated it over and over. It
had to do somehow with Mr. Macy and Charley Moore—the attitudes, the methods of
each of them.
He stopped and felt his clothes. He was drenched to the skin. He
looked about him and, selecting a place in the fence where a tree sheltered it,
perched himself there.
In my credulous years—he thought—they told me that evil was a sort
of dirty hue, just as definite as a soiled collar, but it seems to me that evil
is only a manner of hard luck, or heredity-and-environment, or "being
found out." It hides in the vacillations of dubs like Charley Moore as
certainly as it does in the intolerance of Macy, and if it ever gets much more
tangible it becomes merely an arbitrary label to paste on the unpleasant things
in other people's lives.
In fact—he concluded—it isn't worth worrying over what's evil and
what isn't. Good and evil aren't any standard to me—and they can be a devil of
a bad hindrance when I want something. When I want something bad enough, common
sense tells me to go and take it—and not get caught.
And then suddenly Dalyrimple knew what he wanted first. He wanted
fifteen dollars to pay his overdue board bill.
With a furious energy he jumped from the fence, whipped off his
coat, and from its black lining cut with his knife a piece about five inches
square. He made two holes near its edge and then fixed it on his face, pulling
his hat down to hold it in place. It flapped grotesquely and then dampened and
clung clung to his forehead and cheeks.
Now . . . The twilight had merged to dripping dusk . . . black as
pitch. He began to walk quickly back toward town, not waiting to remove the
mask but watching the road with difficulty through the jagged eye-holes. He was
not conscious of any nervousness . . . the only tension was caused by a desire
to do the thing as soon as possible.
He reached the first sidewalk, continued on until he saw a hedge
far from any lamp-post, and turned in behind it. Within a minute he heard
several series of footsteps—he waited—it was a woman and he held his breath
until she passed . . . and then a man, a laborer. The next passer, he felt,
would be what he wanted . . . the laborer's footfalls died far up the drenched
street . . . other steps grew nears grew suddenly louder.
Dalyrimple braced himself.
"Put up your hands!"
The man stopped, uttered an absurd little grunt, and thrust pudgy
arms skyward.
Dalyrimple went through the waistcoat.
"Now, you shrimp," he said, setting his hand
suggestively to his own hip pocket, "you run, and stamp—loud! If I hear
your feet stop I'll put a shot after you!"
Then he stood there in sudden uncontrollable laughter as audibly
frightened footsteps scurried away into the night.
After a moment he thrust the roll of bills into his pocket,
snatched off his mask, and running quickly across the street, darted down an
alley.
IV
Yet, however Dalyrimple justified himself intellectually, he had
many bad moments in the weeks immediately following his decision. The
tremendous pressure of sentiment and inherited ambition kept raising riot with
his attitude. He felt morally lonely.
The noon after his first venture he ate in a little lunch-room
with Charley Moore and, watching him unspread the paper, waited for a remark
about the hold-up of the day before. But either the hold-up was not mentioned
or Charley wasn't interested. He turned listlessly to the sporting sheet, read
Doctor Crane's crop of seasoned bromides, took in an editorial on ambition with
his mouth slightly ajar, and then skipped to Mutt and Jeff.
Poor Charley—with his faint aura of evil and his mind that refused
to focus, playing a lifeless solitaire with cast-off mischief.
Yet Charley belonged on the other side of the fence. In him could
be stirred up all the flamings and denunciations of righteousness; he would
weep at a stage heroine's lost virtue, he could become lofty and contemptuous
at the idea of dishonor.
On my side, thought Dalyrimple, there aren't any resting-places; a
man who's a strong criminal is after the weak criminals as well, so it's all
guerilla warfare over here.
What will it all do to me? he thought with a persistent weariness.
Will it take the color out of life with the honor? Will it scatter my courage
and dull my mind?—despiritualize me completely—does it mean eventual
barrenness, eventual remorse, failure?
With a great surge of anger, he would fling his mind upon the
barrier—and stand there with the flashing bayonet of his pride. Other men who
broke the laws of justice and charity lied to all the world. He at any rate
would not lie to himself. He was more than Byronic now: not the spiritual
rebel, Don Juan; not the philosophical rebel, Faust; but a new psychological
rebel of his own century—defying the sentimental a priori forms of his own
mind——
Happiness was what he wanted—a slowly rising scale of
gratifications of the normal appetites—and he had a strong conviction that the
materials, if not the inspiration of happiness, could be bought with money.
V
The night came that drew him out upon his second venture, and as
he walked the dark street he felt in himself a great resemblance to a cat—a
certain supple, swinging litheness. His muscles were rippling smoothly and
sleekly under his spare, healthy flesh—he had an absurd desire to bound along
the street, to run dodging among trees, to turn "cart-wheels" over
soft grass.
It was not crisp, but in the air lay a faint suggestion of
acerbity, inspirational rather than chilling.
"The moon is down—I have not heard the clock!"
He laughed in delight at the line which an early memory had
endowed with a hushed awesome beauty.
He passed a man and then another a quarter of mile afterward.
He was on Philmore Street now and it was very dark. He blessed the
city council for not having put in new lamp-posts as a recent budget had
recommended. Here was the red-brick Sterner residence which marked the
beginning of the avenue; here was the Jordon house, the Eisenhaurs', the
Dents', the Markhams', the Frasers'; the Hawkins', where he had been a guest;
the Willoughbys', the Everett's, colonial and ornate; the little cottage where
lived the Watts old maids between the imposing fronts of the Macys' and the
Krupstadts'; the Craigs—
Ah . . . there! He paused, wavered violently—far up
the street was a blot, a man walking, possibly a policeman. After an eternal
second be found himself following the vague, ragged shadow of a lamp-post
across a lawn, running bent very low. Then he was standing tense, without
breath or need of it, in the shadow of his limestone prey.
Interminably he listened—a mile off a cat howled, a hundred yards
away another took up the hymn in a demoniacal snarl, and he felt his heart dip
and swoop, acting as shock-absorber for his mind. There were other sounds; the
faintest fragment of song far away; strident, gossiping laughter from a back
porch diagonally across the alley; and crickets, crickets singing in the
patched, patterned, moonlit grass of the yard. Within the house there seemed to
lie an ominous silence. He was glad he did not know who lived here.
His slight shiver hardened to steel; the steel softened and his
nerves became pliable as leather; gripping his hands he gratefully found them
supple, and taking out knife and pliers he went to work on the screen.
So sure was he that he was unobserved that, from the dining-room
where in a minute he found himself, he leaned out and carefully pulled the
screen up into position, balancing it so it would neither fall by chance nor be
a serious obstacle to a sudden exit.
Then he put the open knife in his coat pocket, took out his
pocket-flash, and tiptoed around the room.
There was nothing here he could use—the dining-room had never been
included in his plans for the town was too small to permit disposing of silver.
As a matter of fact his plans were of the vaguest. He had found
that with a mind like his, lucrative in intelligence, intuition, and lightning
decision, it was best to have but the skeleton of a campaign. The machine-gun
episode had taught him that. And he was afraid that a method preconceived would
give him two points of view in a crisis—and two points of view meant wavering.
He stumbled slightly on a chair, held his breath, listened, went
on, found the hall, found the stairs, started up; the seventh stair creaked at
his step, the ninth, the fourteenth. He was counting them automatically. At the
third creak he paused again for over a minute—and in that minute he felt more
alone than he had ever felt before. Between the lines on patrol, even when
alone, he had had behind him the moral support of half a billion people; now he
was alone, pitted against that same moral pressure—a bandit. He had never felt
this fear, yet he had never felt this exultation.
The stairs came to an end, a doorway approached; he went in and
listened to regular breathing. His feet were economical of steps and his body
swayed sometimes at stretching as he felt over the bureau, pocketing all
articles which held promise—he could not have enumerated them ten seconds
afterward. He felt on a chair for possible trousers, found soft garments,
women's lingerie. The corners of his mouth smiled mechanically.
Another room . . . the same breathing, enlivened by one ghastly
snort that sent his heart again on its tour of his breast. Round object—watch;
chain; roll of bills; stick-pins; two rings—he remembered that he had got rings
from the other bureau. He started out winced as a faint glow flashed in front
of him, facing him. God!—it was the glow of his own wrist-watch on his
outstretched arm.
Down the stairs. He skipped two crumbing steps but found another.
He was all right now, practically safe; as he neared the bottom he felt a
slight boredom. He reached the dining-room —considered the silver—again decided
against it.
Back in his room at the boarding-house he examined the additions
to his personal property:
Sixty-five dollars in bills.
A platinum ring with three medium diamonds, worth, probably, about
seven hundred dollars. Diamonds were going up.
A cheap gold-plated ring with the initials O. S. and the date
inside—'03—probably a class-ring from school. Worth a few dollars. Unsalable.
A red-cloth case containing a set of false teeth.
A silver watch.
A gold chain worth more than the watch.
An empty ring-box.
A little ivory Chinese god—probably a desk ornament.
A dollar and sixty-two cents in small change.
He put the money under his pillow and the other things in the toe
of an infantry boot, stuffing a stocking in on top of them. Then for two hours
his mind raced like a high-power engine here and there through his life, past
and future, through fear and laughter. With a vague, inopportune wish that he
were married, he fell into a deep sleep about half past five.
VI
Though the newspaper account of the burglary failed to mention the
false teeth, they worried him considerably. The picture of a human waking in
the cool dawn and groping for them in vain, of a soft, toothless breakfast, of
a strange, hollow, lisping voice calling the police station, of weary,
dispirited visits to the dentist, roused a great fatherly pity in him.
Trying to ascertain whether they belonged to a man or a woman, he
took them carefully out of the case and held them up near his mouth. He moved
his own jaws experimentally; he measured with his fingers; but he failed to
decide: they might belong either to a large-mouthed woman or a small-mouthed
man.
On a warm impulse he wrapped them in brown paper from the bottom
of his army trunk, and printed false teeth on the package in
clumsy pencil letters. Then, the next night, he walked down Philmore Street,
and shied the package onto the lawn so that it would be near the door. Next day
the paper announced that the police had a clew—they knew that the burglar was
in town. However, they didn't mention what the clew was.
VII
At the end of a month "Burglar Bill of the Silver District
was the nurse-girl's standby for frightening children. Five burglaries were
attributed to him, but though Dalyrimple had only committed three, he
considered that majority had it and appropriated the title to himself. He had
once been seen—"a large bloated creature with the meanest face you ever
laid eyes on." Mrs. Henry Coleman, awaking at two o'clock at the beam of
an electric torch flashed in her eye, could not have been expected to recognize
Bryan Dalyrimple at whom she had waved flags last Fourth of July, and whom she
had described as "not at all the daredevil type, do you think?"
When Dalyrimple kept his imagination at white heat he managed to
glorify his own attitude, his emancipation from petty scruples and remorses—but
let him once allow his thought to rove unarmored, great unexpected horrors and
depressions would overtake him. Then for reassurance he had to go back to think
out the whole thing over again. He found that it was on the whole better to
give up considering himself as a rebel. It was more consoling to think of every
one else as a fool.
His attitude toward Mr. Macy underwent a change. He no longer felt
a dim animosity and inferiority in his presence. As his fourth month in the
store ended he found himself regarding his employer in a manner that was almost
fraternal. He had a vague but very assured conviction that Mr. Macy's innermost
soul would have abetted and approved. He no longer worried about his future. He
had the intention of accumulating several thousand dollars and then clearing
out—going east, back to France, down to South America. Half a dozen times in
the last two months he had been about to stop work, but a fear of attracting
attention to his being in funds prevented him. So he worked on, no longer in
listlessness, but with contemptuous amusement.
VIII
Then with astounding suddenness something happened that changed
his plans and put an end to his burglaries.
Mr. Macy sent for him one afternoon and with a great show of
jovial mystery asked him if he had an engagement that night. If he hadn't,
would he please call on Mr. Alfred J. Fraser at eight o'clock. Dalyrimple's
wonder was mingled with uncertainty. He debated with himself whether it were
not his cue to take the first train out of town. But an hour's consideration decided
him that his fears were unfounded and at eight o'clock he arrived at the big
Fraser house in Philmore Avenue.
Mr. Fraser was commonly supposed to be the biggest political
influence in the city. His brother was Senator Fraser, his son-in-law was Congressman
Demming, and his influence, though not wielded in such a way as to make him an
objectionable boss, was strong nevertheless.
He had a great, huge face, deep-set eyes, and a barn-door of an
upper lip, the melange approaching a worthy climax in a long professional jaw.
During his conversation with Dalyrimple his expression kept
starting toward a smile, reached a cheerful optimism, and then receded back to
imperturbability.
"How do you do, sir?" he laid, holding out his hand.
"Sit down. I suppose you're wondering why I wanted you. Sit down."
Dalyrimple sat down.
"Mr. Dalyrimple, how old are you?"
"I'm twenty-three."
"You're young. But that doesn't mean you're foolish. Mr.
Dalyrimple, what I've got to say won't take long. I'm going to make you a
proposition. To begin at the beginning, I've been watching you ever since last
Fourth of July when you made that speech in response to the loving-cup."
Dalyrimple murmured disparagingly, but Fraser waved him to
silence.
"It was a speech I've remembered. It was a brainy speech,
straight from the shoulder, and it got to everybody in that crowd. I know. I've
watched crowds for years." He cleared his throat as if tempted to digress
on his knowledge of crowds—then continued. "But, Mr. Dalyrimple, I've seen
too many young men who promised brilliantly go to pieces, fail through want of
steadiness, too many high-power ideas, and not enough willingness to work. So I
waited. I wanted to see what you'd do. I wanted to see if you'd go to work, and
if you'd stick to what you started."
Dalyrimple felt a glow settle over him.
"So," continued Fraser, "when Theron Macy told me
you'd started down at his place, I kept watching you, and I followed your
record through him. The first month I was afraid for awhile. He told me you
were getting restless, too good for your job, hinting around for a
raise——"
Dalyrimple started.
"——But he said after that you evidently made up your mind to
shut up and stick to it. That's the stuff I like in a young man! That's the
stuff that wins out. And don't think I don't understand. I know how much harder
it was for you after all that silly flattery a lot of old women had been giving
you. I know what a fight it must have been——"
Dalyrimple's face was burning brightly. It felt young and
strangely ingenuous.
"Dalyrimple, you've got brains and you've got the stuff in
you— and that's what I want. I'm going to put you into the State Senate."
"The what?"
"The State Senate. We want a young man who has got brains,
but is solid and not a loafer. And when I say State Senate I don't stop there.
We're up against it here, Dalyrimple. We've got to get some young men into
politics—you know the old blood that's been running on the party ticket year in
and year out."
Dalyrimple licked his lips.
"You'll run me for the State Senate?"
"I'll put you in the State Senate."
Mr. Fraser's expression had now reached the point nearest a smile
and Dalyrimple in a happy frivolity felt himself urging it mentally on—but it
stopped, locked, and slid from him. The barn-door and the jaw were separated by
a line strait as a nail. Dalyrimple remembered with an effort that it was a
mouth, and talked to it.
"But I'm through," he said. "My notoriety's dead.
People are fed up with me."
"Those things," answered Mr. Fraser, "are
mechanical. Linotype is a resuscitator of reputations. Wait till you see
the herald, beginning next week—that is if you're with us—that
is," and his voice hardened slightly, "if you haven't got too many
ideas yourself about how things ought to be run."
"No," said Dalyrimple, looking him frankly in the eye.
"You'll have to give me a lot of advice at first."
"Very well. I'll take care of your reputation then. Just keep
yourself on the right side of the fence."
Dalyrimple started at this repetition of a phrase he had thought
of so much lately. There was a sudden ring at the door-bell.
"That's Macy now," observed Fraser, rising. "I'll
go let him in. The servants have gone to bed."
He left Dalyrimple there in a dream. The world was opening up
suddenly— The State Senate, the United States Senate—so life was this after
all—cutting corners—common sense, that was the rule. No more foolish risks now
unless necessity called—but it was being hard that counted— Never to let
remorse or self-reproach lose him a night's sleep—let his life be a sword of
courage—there was no payment—all that was drivel—drivel.
He sprang to his feet with clinched hands in a sort of triumph.
"Well, Bryan," said Mr. Macy stepping through the
portières.
The two older men smiled their half-smiles at him.
"Well Bryan," said Mr. Macy again.
Dalyrimple smiled also.
"How do, Mr. Macy?"
He wondered if some telepathy between them had made this new
appreciation possible—some invisible realization. . . .
Mr. Macy held out his hand.
"I'm glad we're to be associated in this scheme—I've been for
you all along—especially lately. I'm glad we're to be on the same side of the
fence."
"I want to thank you, sir," said Dalyrimple simply. He
felt a whimsical moisture gathering back of his eyes.
At the present time no
one I know has the slightest desire to hit Samuel Meredith; possibly this is
because a man over fifty is liable to be rather severely cracked at the impact
of a hostile fist, but, for my part, I am inclined to think that all his hitable
qualities have quite vanished. But it is certain that at various times in his
life hitable qualities were in his face, as surely as kissable qualities have
ever lurked in a girl's lips.
I'm sure every one has met a man like that, been casually
introduced, even made a friend of him, yet felt he was the sort who aroused
passionate dislike—expressed by some in the involuntary clinching of fists, and
in others by mutterings about "takin' a poke" and "landin' a
swift smash in ee eye." In the juxtaposition of Samuel Meredith's features
this quality was so strong that it influenced his entire life.
What was it? Not the shape, certainly, for he was a
pleasant-looking man from earliest youth: broad-bowed with gray eyes that were
frank and friendly. Yet I've heard him tell a room full of reporters angling
for a "success" story that he'd be ashamed to tell them the truth
that they wouldn't believe it, that it wasn't one story but four, that the
public would not want to read about a man who had been walloped into prominence.
It all started at Phillips Andover Academy when he was fourteen.
He had been brought up on a diet of caviar and bell-boys' legs in half the
capitals of Europe, and it was pure luck that his mother had nervous
prostration and had to delegate his education to less tender, less biassed
hands.
At Andover he was given a roommate named Gilly Hood. Gilly was
thirteen, undersized, and rather the school pet. From the September day when
Mr. Meredith's valet stowed Samuel's clothing in the best bureau and asked, on
departing, "hif there was hanything helse, Master Samuel?" Gilly
cried out that the faculty had played him false. He felt like an irate frog in
whose bowl has been put goldfish.
"Good gosh!" he complained to his sympathetic
contemporaries, "he's a damn stuck-up Willie. He said, 'Are the crowd here
gentlemen?' and I said, 'No, they're boys,' and he said age didn't matter, and
I said, 'Who said it did?' Let him get fresh with me, the ole pieface!"
For three weeks Gilly endured in silence young Samuel's comments
on the clothes and habits of Gilly's personal friends, endured French phrases
in conversation, endured a hundred half-feminine meannesses that show what a
nervous mother can do to a boy, if she keeps close enough to him—then a storm
broke in the aquarium.
Samuel was out. A crowd had gathered to hear Gilly be wrathful
about his roommate's latest sins.
"He said, 'Oh, I don't like the windows open at night,' he
said, 'except only a little bit,'" complained Gilly.
"Don't let him boss you."
"Boss me? You bet he won't. I open those windows, I guess,
but the darn fool won't take turns shuttin' 'em in the morning."
"Make him, Gilly, why don't you?"
"I'm going to." Gilly nodded his head in fierce
agreement. "Don't you worry. He needn't think I'm any ole butler."
"Le's see you make him."
At this point the darn fool entered in person and included the
crowd in one of his irritating smiles. Two boys said, "'Lo,
Mer'dith"; the others gave him a chilly glance and went on talking to
Gilly. But Samuel seemed unsatisfied.
"Would you mind not sitting on my bed?" he suggested
politely to two of Gilly's particulars who were perched very much at ease.
"Huh?"
"My bed. Can't you understand English?"
This was adding insult to injury. There were several comments on
the bed's sanitary condition and the evidence within it of animal life.
"S'matter with your old bed?" demanded Gilly
truculently.
"The bed's all right, but——"
Gilly interrupted this sentence by rising and walking up to
Samuel. He paused several inches away and eyed him fiercely.
"You an' your crazy ole bed," he began. "You an'
your crazy——"
"Go to it, Gilly," murmured some one.
"Show the darn fool—"
Samuel returned the gaze coolly.
"Well," he said finally, "it's my bed—"
He got no further, for Gilly hauled off and hit him succinctly in
the nose.
"Yea! Gilly!"
"Show the big bully!"
"Just let him touch you—he'll see!"
The group closed in on them and for the first time in his life
Samuel realized the insuperable inconvenience of being passionately detested.
He gazed around helplessly at the glowering, violently hostile faces. He
towered a head taller than his roommate, so if he hit back he'd be called a
bully and have half a dozen more fights on his hands within five minutes; yet
if he didn't he was a coward. For a moment he stood there facing Gilly's
blazing eyes, and then, with a sudden choking sound, he forced his way through
the ring and rushed from the room.
The month following bracketed the thirty most miserable days of
his life. Every waking moment he was under the lashing tongues of his
contemporaries; his habits and mannerisms became butts for intolerable witticisms
and, of course, the sensitiveness of adolescence was a further thorn. He
considered that he was a natural pariah; that the unpopularity at school would
follow him through life. When he went home for the Christmas holidays he was so
despondent that his father sent him to a nerve specialist. When he returned to
Andover he arranged to arrive late so that he could be alone in the bus during
the drive from station to school.
Of course when he had learned to keep his mouth shut every one
promptly forgot all about him. The next autumn, with his realization that
consideration for others was the discreet attitude, he made good use of the
clean start given him by the shortness of boyhood memory. By the beginning of
his senior year Samuel Meredith was one of the best-liked boys of his class—and
no one was any stronger for him than his first friend and constant companion,
Gilly Hood.
II
Samuel became the sort of college student who in the early
nineties drove tandems and coaches and tallyhos between Princeton and Yale and
New York City to show that they appreciated the social importance of football
games. He believed passionately in good form—his choosing of gloves, his tying
of ties, his holding of reins were imitated by impressionable freshmen. Outside
of his own set he was considered rather a snob, but as his set was the set,
it never worried him. He played football in the autumn, drank high-balls in the
winter, and rowed in the spring. Samuel despised all those who were merely
sportsmen without being gentlemen or merely gentlemen without being sportsmen.
He lived in New York and often brought home several of his friends
for the week-end. Those were the days of the horse-car and in case of a crush
it was, of course, the proper thing for any one of Samuel's set to rise and
deliver his seat to a standing lady with a formal bow. One night in Samuel's
junior year he boarded a car with two of his intimates. There were three vacant
seats. When Samuel sat down he noticed a heavy-eyed laboring man sitting next
to him who smelt objectionably of garlic, sagged slightly against Samuel and,
spreading a little as a tired man will, took up quite too much room.
The car had gone several blocks when it stopped for a quartet of
young girls, and, of course, the three men of the world sprang to their feet
and proffered their seats with due observance of form. Unfortunately, the
laborer, being unacquainted with the code of neckties and tallyhos, failed to
follow their example, and one young lady was left at an embarrassed stance.
Fourteen eyes glared reproachfully at the barbarian; seven lips curled
slightly; but the object of scorn stared stolidly into the foreground in sturdy
unconsciousness of his despicable conduct. Samuel was the most violently
affected. He was humiliated that any male should so conduct himself. He spoke
aloud.
"There's a lady standing," he said sternly.
That should have been quite enough, but the object of scorn only
looked up blankly. The standing girl tittered and exchanged nervous glances
with her companions. But Samuel was aroused.
"There's a lady standing," he repeated, rather
raspingly. The man seemed to comprehend.
"I pay my fare," he said quietly.
Samuel turned red and his hands clinched, but the conductor was
looking their way, so at a warning nod from his friends he subsided into sullen
gloom.
They reached their destination and left the car, but so did the
laborer, who followed them, swinging his little pail. Seeing his chance, Samuel
no longer resisted his aristocratic inclination. He turned around and, launching
a full-featured, dime-novel sneer, made a loud remark about the right of the
lower animals to ride with human beings.
In a half-second the workman had dropped his pail and let fly at
him. Unprepared, Samuel took the blow neatly on the jaw and sprawled full
length into the cobblestone gutter.
"Don't laugh at me!" cried his assailant. "I been
workin' all day. I'm tired as hell!"
As he spoke the sudden anger died out of his eyes and the mask of
weariness dropped again over his face. He turned and picked up his pail.
Samuel's friends took a quick step in his direction.
"Wait!" Samuel had risen slowly and was motioning back.
Some time, somewhere, he had been struck like that before. Then he
remembered—Gilly Hood. In the silence, as he dusted himself off, the whole
scene in the room at Andover was before his eyes— and he knew intuitively that
he had been wrong again. This man's strength, his rest, was the protection of
his family. He had more use for his seat in the street-car than any young girl.
"It's all right," said Samuel gruffly. "Don't touch
'him. I've been a damn fool."
Of course it took more than an hour, or a week, for Samuel to
rearrange his ideas on the essential importance of good form. At first he
simply admitted that his wrongness had made him powerless—as it had made him
powerless against Gilly—but eventually his mistake about the workman influenced
his entire attitude. Snobbishness is, after all, merely good breeding grown
dictatorial; so Samuel's code remained but the necessity of imposing it upon
others had faded out in a certain gutter. Within that year his class had
somehow stopped referring to him as a snob.
III
After a few years Samuel's university decided that it had shone
long enough in the reflected glory of his neckties, so they declaimed to him in
Latin, charged him ten dollars for the paper which proved him irretrievably
educated, and sent him into the turmoil with much self-confidence, a few
friends, and the proper assortment of harmless bad habits.
His family had by that time started back to shirt-sleeves, through
a sudden decline in the sugar-market, and it had already unbuttoned its vest,
so to speak, when Samuel went to work. His mind was that exquisite tabula
rasa that a university education sometimes leaves, but he had both
energy and influence, so he used his former ability as a dodging half-back in
twisting through Wall Street crowds as runner for a bank.
His diversion was—women. There were half a dozen: two or three
débutantes, an actress (in a minor way), a grass-widow, and one sentimental
little brunette who was married and lived in a little house in Jersey City.
They had met on a ferry-boat. Samuel was crossing from New York on
business (he had been working several years by this time) and he helped her
look for a package that she had dropped in the crush.
"Do you come over often?" he inquired casually.
"Just to shop," she said shyly. She had great brown eyes
and the pathetic kind of little mouth. "I've only been married three
months, and we find it cheaper to live over here."
"Does he—does your husband like your being alone like
this?"
She laughed, a cheery young laugh.
"Oh, dear me, no. We were to meet for dinner but I must have
misunderstood the place. He'll be awfully worried."
"Well," said Samuel disapprovingly, "he ought to
be. If you'll allow me I'll see you home."
She accepted his offer thankfully, so they took the cable-car
together. When they walked up the path to her little house they saw a light
there; her husband had arrived before her.
"He's frightfully jealous," she announced, laughingly
apologetic.
"Very well," answered Samuel, rather stiffly. "I'd
better leave you here."
She thanked him and, waving a good night, he left her.
That would have been quite all if they hadn't met on Fifth Avenue
one morning a week later. She started and blushed and seemed so glad to see him
that they chatted like old friends. She was going to her dressmaker's, eat
lunch alone at Taine's, shop all afternoon, and meet her husband on the ferry at
five. Samuel told her that her husband was a very lucky man. She blushed again
and scurried off.
Samuel whistled all the way back to his office, but about twelve
o'clock he began to see that pathetic, appealing little mouth everywhere—and
those brown eyes. He fidgeted when he looked at the clock; he thought of the
grill down-stairs where he lunched and the heavy male conversation thereof, and
opposed to that picture appeared another; a little table at Taine's with the
brown eyes and the mouth a few feet away. A few minutes before twelve-thirty he
dashed on his hat and rushed for the cable-car.
She was quite surprised to see him.
"Why—hello," she said. Samuel could tell that she was
just pleasantly frightened.
"I thought we might lunch together. It's so dull eating with
a lot of men."
She hesitated.
"Why, I suppose there's no harm in it. How could there
be!"
It occurred to her that her husband should have taken lunch with
her—but he was generally so hurried at noon. She told Samuel all about him: he
was a little smaller than Samuel, but, oh, much better-looking.
He was a book-keeper and not making a lot of money, but they were very happy
and expected to be rich within three or four years.
Samuel's grass-widow had been in a quarrelsome mood for three or
four weeks, and through contrast, he took an accentuated pleasure in this
meeting; so fresh was she, and earnest, and faintly adventurous. Her name was
Marjorie.
They made another engagement; in fact, for a month they lunched
together two or three times a week. When she was sure that her husband would
work late Samuel took her over to New Jersey on the ferry, leaving her always
on the tiny front porch, after she had gone in and lit the gas to use the
security of his masculine presence outside. This grew to be a ceremony—and it
annoyed him. Whenever the comfortable glow fell out through the front windows,
that was his congé; yet he never suggested coming in and Marjorie
didn't invite him.
Then, when Samuel and Marjorie had reached a stage in which they
sometimes touched each other's arms gently, just to show that they were very
good friends, Marjorie and her husband had one of those ultrasensitive,
supercritical quarrels that couples never indulge in unless they care a great
deal about each other. It started with a cold mutton-chop or a leak in the
gas-jet—and one day Samuel found her in Taine's, with dark shadows under her
brown eyes and a terrifying pout.
By this time Samuel thought he was in love with Marjorie—so he
played up the quarrel for all it was worth. He was her best friend and patted
her hand—and leaned down close to her brown curls while she whispered in little
sobs what her husband had said that morning; and he was a little more than her
best friend when he took her over to the ferry in a hansom.
"Marjorie," he said gently, when he left her, as usual,
on the porch, "if at any time you want to call on me, remember that I am
always waiting, always waiting."
She nodded gravely and put both her hands in his. "I
know," she said. "I know you're my friend, my best friend."
Then she ran into the house and he watched there until the gas
went on.
For the next week Samuel was in a nervous turmoil. Some
persistently rational strain warned him that at bottom he and Marjorie had
little in common, but in such cases there is usually so much mud in the water
that one can seldom see to the bottom. Every dream and desire told him that he
loved Marjorie, wanted her, had to have her.
The quarrel developed. Marjorie's husband took to staying in New
York until late at night, came home several times disagreeably overstimulated,
and made her generally miserable. They must have had too much pride to talk it
out—for Marjorie's husband was, after all, pretty decent—so it drifted on from
one misunderstanding to another. Marjorie kept coming more and more to Samuel;
when a woman can accept masculine sympathy at is much more satisfactory to her
than crying to another girl. But Marjorie didn't realize how much she had begun
to rely on him, how much he was part of her little cosmos.
One night, instead of turning away when Marjorie went in and lit
the gas, Samuel went in, too, and they sat together on the sofa in the little
parlor. He was very happy. He envied their home, and he felt that the man who
neglected such a possession out of stubborn pride was a fool and unworthy of
his wife. But when he kissed Marjorie for the first time she cried softly and
told him to go. He sailed home on the wings of desperate excitement, quite
resolved to fan this spark of romance, no matter how big the blaze or who was
burned. At the time he considered that his thoughts were unselfishly of her; in
a later perspective he knew that she had meant no more than the white screen in
a motion picture: it was just Samuel—blind, desirous.
Next day at Taine's, when they met for lunch, Samuel dropped all
pretense and made frank love to her. He had no plans, no definite intentions,
except to kiss her lips again, to hold her in his arms and feel that she was
very little and pathetic and lovable. . . . He took her home, and this time
they kissed until both their hearts beat high—words and phrases formed on his
lips.
And then suddenly there were steps on the porch—a hand tried the
outside door. Marjorie turned dead-white.
"Wait!" she whispered to Samuel, in a frightened voice,
but in angry impatience at the interruption he walked to the front door and
threw it open.
Every one has seen such scenes on the stage—seen them so often
that when they actually happen people behave very much like actors. Samuel felt
that he was playing a part and the lines came quite naturally: he announced
that all had a right to lead their own lives and looked at Marjorie's husband
menacingly, as if daring him to doubt it. Marjorie's husband spoke of the
sanctity of the home, forgetting that it hadn't seemed very holy to him lately;
Samuel continued along the line of "the right to happiness";
Marjorie's husband mentioned firearms and the divorce court. Then suddenly he
stopped and scrutinized both of them—Marjorie in pitiful collapse on the sofa,
Samuel haranguing the furniture in a consciously heroic pose.
"Go up-stairs, Marjorie," he said, in a different tone.
"Stay where you are!" Samuel countered quickly.
Marjorie rose, wavered, and sat down, rose again and moved
hesitatingly toward the stairs.
"Come outside," said her husband to Samuel. "I want
to talk to you."
Samuel glanced at Marjorie, tried to get some message from her
eyes; then he shut his lips and went out.
There was a bright moon and when Marjorie's husband came down the
steps Samuel could see plainly that he was suffering—but he felt no pity for
him.
They stood and looked at each other, a few feet apart, and the
husband cleared his throat as though it were a bit husky.
"That's my wife," he said quietly, and then a wild anger
surged up inside him. "Damn you!" he cried—and hit Samuel in the face
with all his strength.
In that second, as Samuel slumped to the ground, it flashed to him
that he had been hit like that twice before, and simultaneously the incident
altered like a dream—he felt suddenly awake. Mechanically he sprang to his feet
and squared off. The other man was waiting, fists up, a yard away, but Samuel
knew that though physically he had him by several inches and many pounds, he wouldn't
hit him. The situation had miraculously and entirely changed—a moment before
Samuel had seemed to himself heroic; now he seemed the cad, the outsider, and
Marjorie's husband, silhouetted against the lights of the little house, the
eternal heroic figure, the defender of his home.
There was a pause and then Samuel turned quickly away and went
down the path for the last time.
IV
Of course, after the third blow Samuel put in several weeks at
conscientious introspection. The blow years before at Andover had landed on his
personal unpleasantness; the workman of his college days had jarred the
snobbishness out of his system, and Marjorie's husband had given a severe jolt
to his greedy selfishness. It threw women out of his ken until a year later,
when he met his future wife; for the only sort of woman worth while seemed to
be the one who could be protected as Marjorie's husband had protected her.
Samuel could not imagine his grass-widow, Mrs. De Ferriac, causing any very
righteous blows on her own account.
His early thirties found him well on his feet. He was associated
with old Peter Carhart, who was in those days a national figure. Carhart's
physique was like a rough model for a statue of Hercules, and his record was
just as solid—a pile made for the pure joy of it, without cheap extortion or
shady scandal. He had been a great friend of Samuel's father, but he watched
the son for six years before taking him into his own office. Heaven knows how
many things he controlled at that time—mines, railroads, banks, whole cities.
Samuel was very close to him, knew his likes and dislikes, his prejudices,
weaknesses and many strengths.
One day Carhart sent for Samuel and, closing the door of his inner
office, offered him a chair and a cigar.
"Everything O. K., Samuel?" he asked.
"Why, yes."
"I've been afraid you're getting a bit stale."
"Stale?" Samuel was puzzled.
"You've done no work outside the office for nearly ten
years?"
"But I've had vacations, in the Adiron——"
Carhart waved this aside.
"I mean outside work. Seeing the things move that we've
always pulled the strings of here."
"No," admitted Samuel; "I haven't."
"So," he said abruptly "I'm going to give you an
outside job that'll take about a month."
Samuel didn't argue. He rather liked the idea and he made up his
mind that, whatever it was, he would put it through just as Carhart wanted it.
That was his employer's greatest hobby, and the men around him were as dumb
under direct orders as infantry subalterns.
"You'll go to San Antonio and see Hamil," continued
Carhart. "He's got a job on hand and he wants a man to take charge."
Hamil was in charge of the Carhart interests in the Southwest, a
man who had grown up in the shadow of his employer, and with whom, though they
had never met, Samuel had had much official correspondence.
"When do I leave?"
"You'd better go to-morrow," answered Carhart, glancing
at the calendar. "That's the 1st of May. I'll expect your report here on
the 1st of June."
Next morning Samuel left for Chicago, and two days later he was
facing Hamil across a table in the office of the Merchants' Trust in San
Antonio. It didn't take long to get the gist of the thing. It was a big deal in
oil which concerned the buying up of seventeen huge adjoining ranches. This
buying up had to be done in one week, and it was a pure squeeze. Forces had
been set in motion that put the seventeen owners between the devil and the deep
sea, and Samuel's part was simply to "handle" the matter from a
little village near Pueblo. With tact and efficiency the right man could bring
it off without any friction, for it was merely a question of sitting at the
wheel and keeping a firm hold. Hamil, with an astuteness many times valuable to
his chief, had arranged a situation that would give a much greater clear gain
than any dealing in the open market. Samuel shook hands with Hamil, arranged to
return in two weeks, and left for San Felipe, New Mexico.
It occurred to him, of course, that Carhart was trying him out.
Hamil's report on his handling of this might be a factor in something big for
him, but even without that he would have done his best to put the thing
through. Ten years in New York hadn't made him sentimental and he was quite
accustomed to finish everything he began—and a little bit more.
All went well at first. There was no enthusiasm, but each one of
the seventeen ranchers concerned knew Samuel's business, knew what he had
behind him, and that they had as little chance of holding out as flies on a
window-pane. Some of them were resigned—some of them cared like the devil, but
they'd talked it over, argued it with lawyers and couldn't see any possible
loophole. Five of the ranches had oil, the other twelve were part of the
chance, but quite as necessary to Hamil's purpose, in any event.
Samuel soon saw that the real leader was an early settler named
McIntyre, a man of perhaps fifty, gray-haired, clean-shaven, bronzed by forty
New Mexico summers, and with those clear steady eye that Texas and New Mexico
weather are apt to give. His ranch had not as yet shown oil, but it was in the
pool, and if any man hated to lose his land McIntyre did. Every one had rather
looked to him at first to avert the big calamity, and he had hunted all over
the territory for the legal means with which to do it, but he had failed, and
he knew it. He avoided Samuel assiduously, but Samuel was sure that when the
day came for the signatures he would appear.
It came—a baking May day, with hot wave rising off the parched
land as far as eyes could see, and as Samuel sat stewing in his little
improvised office—a few chairs, a bench, and a wooden table—he was glad the
thing was almost over. He wanted to get back East the worst way, and join his
wife and children for a week at the seashore.
The meeting was set for four o'clock, and he was rather surprised
at three-thirty when the door opened and McIntyre came in. Samuel could not
help respecting the man's attitude, and feeling a bit sorry for him. McIntyre
seemed closely related to the prairies, and Samuel had the little flicker of
envy that city people feel toward men who live in the open.
"Afternoon," said McIntyre, standing in the open
doorway, with his feet apart and his hands on his hips.
"Hello, Mr. McIntyre." Samuel rose, but omitted the
formality of offering his hand. He imagined the rancher cordially loathed him,
and he hardly blamed him. McIntyre came in and sat down leisurely.
"You got us," he said suddenly.
This didn't seem to require any answer.
"When I heard Carhart was back of this," he continued,
"I gave up."
"Mr. Carhart is——" began Samuel, but McIntyre waved him
silent.
"Don't talk about the dirty sneak-thief!"
"Mr. McIntyre," said Samuel briskly, "if this
half-hour is to be devoted to that sort of talk——"
"Oh, dry up, young man," McIntyre interrupted, "you
can't abuse a man who'd do a thing like this."
Samuel made no answer.
"It's simply a dirty filch. There just are skunks
like him too big to handle."
"You're being paid liberally," offered Samuel.
"Shut up!" roared McIntyre suddenly. "I want the privilege
of talking." He walked to the door and looked out across the land, the
sunny, steaming pasturage that began almost at his feet and ended with the
gray-green of the distant mountains. When he turned around his mouth was
trembling.
"Do you fellows love Wall Street?" he said hoarsely,
"or wherever you do your dirty scheming——" He paused. "I suppose
you do. No critter gets so low that he doesn't sort of love the place he's
worked, where he's sweated out the best he's had in him."
Samuel watched him awkwardly. McIntyre wiped his forehead with a
huge blue handkerchief, and continued:
"I reckon this rotten old devil had to have another million.
I reckon we're just a few of the poor he's blotted out to buy a couple more
carriages or something." He waved his hand toward the door. "I built
a house out there when I was seventeen, with these two hands. I took a wife
there at twenty-one, added two wings, and with four mangy steers I started out.
Forty summers I've saw the sun come up over those mountains and drop down red
as blood in the evening, before the heat drifted off and the stars came out. I
been happy in that house. My boy was born there and he died there, late one
spring, in the hottest part of an afternoon like this. Then the wife and I
lived there alone like we'd lived before, and sort of tried to have a home,
after all, not a real home but nigh it—cause the boy always seemed around
close, somehow, and we expected a lot of nights to see him runnin' up the path
to supper." His voice was shaking so he could hardly speak and he turned
again to the door, his gray eyes contracted.
"That's my land out there," he said, stretching out his
arm, "my land, by God— It's all I got in the world—and ever wanted."
He dashed his sleeve across his face, and his tone changed as he turned slowly
and faced Samuel. "But I suppose it's got to go when they want it—it's got
to go."
Samuel had to talk. He felt that in a minute more he would lose
his head. So he began, as level-voiced as he could—in the sort of tone he saved
for disagreeable duties.
"It's business, Mr. McIntyre," he said. "It's
inside the law. Perhaps we couldn't have bought out two or three of you at any
price, but most of you did have a price. Progress demands some things——"
Never had he felt so inadequate, and it was with the greatest
relief that he heard hoof-beats a few hundred yards away.
But at his words the grief in McIntyre's eyes had changed to fury.
"You and your dirty gang of crooks!" he cried. "Not
one of you has got an honest love for anything on God's earth! You're a herd of
money-swine!"
Samuel rose and McIntyre took a step toward him.
"You long-winded dude. You got our land—take that for Peter
Carhart!"
He swung from the shoulder quick as lightning and down went Samuel
in a heap. Dimly he heard steps in the doorway and knew that some one was
holding McIntyre, but there was no need. The rancher had sunk down in his
chair, and dropped his head in his hands.
Samuel's brain was whirring. He realized that the fourth fist had
hit him, and a great flood of emotion cried out that the law that had
inexorably ruled his life was in motion again. In a half-daze he got up and
strode from the room.
The next ten minutes were perhaps the hardest of his life. People
talk of the courage of convictions, but in actual life a man's duty to his
family may make a rigid corpse seem a selfish indulgence of his own
righteousness. Samuel thought mostly of his family, yet he never really
wavered. That jolt had brought him to.
When he came back in the room there were a log of worried faces
waiting for him, but he didn't waste any time explaining.
"Gentlemen," he said, "Mr. McIntyre has been kind
enough to convince me that in this matter you are absolutely right and the
Peter Carhart interests absolutely wrong. As far as I am concerned you can keep
your ranches to the rest of your days."
He pushed his way through an astounded gathering, and within a
half-hour he had sent two telegrams that staggered the operator into complete
unfitness for business; one was to Hamil in San Antonio; one was to Peter
Carhart in New York.
Samuel didn't sleep much that night. He knew that for the first
time in his business career he had made a dismal, miserable failure. But some
instinct in him, stronger than will, deeper than training, had forced him to do
what would probably end his ambitions and his happiness. But it was done and it
never occurred to him that he could have acted otherwise.
Next morning two telegrams were waiting for him. The first was
from Hamil. It contained three words:
"You blamed idiot!"
The second was from New York:
"Deal off come to New York immediately Carhart."
Within a week things had happened. Hamil quarrelled furiously and
violently defended his scheme. He was summoned to New York and spent a bad
half-hour on the carpet in Peter Carhart's office. He broke with the Carhart
interests in July, and in August Samuel Meredith, at thirty-five years old,
was, to all intents, made Carhart's partner. The fourth fist had done its work.
I suppose that there's a caddish streak in every man that runs
crosswise across his character and disposition and general outlook. With some
men it's secret and we never know it's there until they strike us in the dark
one night. But Samuel's showed when it was in action, and the sight of it made
people see red. He was rather lucky in that, because every time his little
devil came up it met a reception that sent it scurrying down below in a sickly,
feeble condition. It was the same devil, the same streak that made him order
Gilly's friends off the bed, that made him go inside Marjorie's house.
If you could run your hand along Samuel Meredith's jaw you'd feel
a lump. He admits he's never been sure which fist left it there, but he
wouldn't lose it for anything. He says there's no cad like an old cad, and that
sometimes just before making a decision, it's a great help to stroke his chin.
The reporters call it a nervous characteristic, but it's not that. It's so he
can feel again the gorgeous clarity, the lightning sanity of those four fists.
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